


Breaking Through Walls

by Astral_Writer



Series: B.T.W. [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M, POV First Person, POV switch, Post-Time Skip, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-11-18
Packaged: 2017-12-29 08:10:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 50,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1003028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Astral_Writer/pseuds/Astral_Writer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the Mugiwara crew runs into a very large hang-up on their journey through the New World, they temporarily split up. In the meantime, Usopp is dealing with an ongoing crush he’s had for quite some time. This side-trip could be the time to make or break the relationship he already has standing with the notorious love-cook. Nerves get the better of him while Sanji has some revelations of his own. It’s not just about jumping hurdles anymore. We need to Break Through them...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ink_Dragon_Rosette](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ink_Dragon_Rosette/gifts).



It all sounded pretty good. Well at least the part where I get to hang out in a little quiet town for three and a half weeks with enough spare time to work on my weapons and… just, uh, monitor and relay messages back and forth between Robin and the Sunny. Yeah. That’s not that hard. Well despite the fact that I’ll be right smack in the middle of a marine town full of marines! That’s got me a little anxious… Okay, a lot of anxious, but I-I can h-handle it. I mean I got the skills. Yeah, I’m probably the only member of this crew, well besides Robin maybe… and maybe Nami—nah, scratch that. She’d start robbin’ everyone blind and then there’d be an uproar or something. Nah, I’m one in the very small percentage of this ship that can actually keep a low profile. I’ll just keep my head down and keep myself distracted and all will be good. As long as I don’t break cover, I’ll be fine.

 Nami had just finished going over the plan again, making sure that absolutely everyone knew what they were supposed to be doing, though we all know the real reason it took her so long to wrap up the meeting was because Luffy kept interrupting and asking questions. It’s not that hard to figure out, really. We’ve reached a small hang-up on our journey through the New World. Okay, maybe small isn’t the right word, but—Ugh…

We got this map on our last stop—now how we got it is its own story right there—Anyway, it’s to an island that’s not connected to the log pose because it’s too far away from any of the closest islands near it—it’s right on the edge of the Calm Belt even—and the maps a treasure map. Robin’s assured everybody that it’s legit so we’re going for it. But we don’t know how to find it ‘cause we don’t have a positive heading. That’s until we reached the next island on the log pose. Now here’s where things get complicated. There’s a marine check point here and not just a normal one either. They’ve got this wall that spans as far as the eye can see. According to what we heard from people on the island, it’s supposedly still under construction, but it spans the entire length of the Grand Line—from Calm Belt to Calm Belt—freaky, huh?

But the gate only opens once a month and only ships that get marine clearance can get through. Now, I’d like to beg the question about how other pirates have managed to get across, but it seems that nobody wants to hear it right now ‘cause they’re all in their strategic battle planning modes and don’t want to listen to the brilliant Captain Usopp’s observations. Though at the same time I wonder why Robin hasn’t brought it up either.

Uh, anyway Nami’s got this plan worked out where she and most of the crew sail along this man made sea wall out to the Calm Belt, using it like tethering rope, and then sail along the Calm Belt until they reach the island with the treasure on it. Meanwhile, Robin’s gonna sneak inside the marine base undercover and sabotage the gate so we can get through. Thing is, both projects are going to take a lot time and that’s too long to go without hearing from Robin, so Franky and I offered up our newest invention. It’s a modified version of your household den den mushi that we’ve tricked out with some camera dials. It runs on a different frequency so the marines can’t intercept our messages. The only catch is the equipment to use it is, well, uh, kinda bulky. I haven’t had the time to size it down, okay? So I made a smaller one that can transmit over a shorter distance and gave it to Robin and kinda ended up volunteering myself to stay on the island and work as the middle man. I get her messages and then radio them back to the crew on the Sunny and vice a versa. That way if something happens, everybody will know about it.

Yeah, it’s a pretty good plan… If Sanji didn’t have to throw a fit about Robin going into the marine base all by herself…

“Why must the lovely Robin-chwan go in to such a dangerous place all by herself? You can’t send a lady into a marine base like this without any kind of backup?” Sanji looks pretty upset about it, but he always gets like this whenever it involves Nami or Robin. It’s normal, I know that, but—agh, uh, never mind.

Nami rubs her palm down the length of her face. “Sanji,” she sighs as she says his name, “that’s what Usopp’s for.”

I squeaked involuntarily and try to cover it up with a cough before bumbling over the word, “W-wha-a-t?!” This is the first I’ve heard of this. Wasn’t I just the relay boy?

“You expect that coward to be any help if Robin-chan gets in trouble,” Sanji yells back before realizing that he’s yelling _at_ Nami and backtracks a bit. “I mean, your plans are brilliant as always Nami-swan, no one calculates strategies quite like you, but I’m still worried about what could happen to Robin-chan when we’re all so far away and can’t come to assist her.”

If I wasn’t still stuck on the fact that—a) _I’m Robin’s back up?!_ and b) Sanji’d just taken a verbal kick at me—I’d be rolling my eyes at him. If anyone on this ship is capable of handling themselves in any given situation, it’s Robin and Sanji’s completely blowing this out of proportion, even for him. As luck has it, Zoro’s arguing my point that Sanji’s being stupid for me, which is escalating into a mini-brawl in the galley which Luffy is half attempting to join—still smiling—if not for Franky holding him back.

Nami’s rubbing her face again and sighing in exasperation, but I can feel her eyes on _me_ , peeking from between her fingers. She’s got this sympathetic thing going and it’s all because she’s been prying.

It’s been kind of my well-kept secret that Nami’s invited herself to be part of and nobody besides the two of us—Hmm.. and possibly Robin ‘cause she gives me those knowing looks every once in a while too—that I’ve got unrequited feelings for our ship’s chef. Argh, I feel like such a masochist sometimes, falling complete nose-over-heels in love with the deadly love-cook that loves all women and seemingly despises all homosexuals and okama. Not that I’ve got anything to do with the latter… or even the former to be honest. It’s just… Sanji. Besides my long standing crush that I once had for Kaya that lasted for so long and the occasional cute girls we meet, he’s the only person that’s made my heart beat like it’s trying to shatter my rib cage or twist like it’s tied to a rotating propeller. Sometimes I’d like to take a step back and yell at myself for a while for getting me into this heart wrenching situation.

It started back a while ago, maybe even back when we first met him at that sea restaurant, the Baratie; back when he first came up to our table and started swooning over Nami. He was really sharp looking—confident—and if he wasn’t noodling over some girl, he actually looked really cool.

Back then I was admiring him, I think. You know, like an idol or something. He was strong and able to stand next to our captain and Zoro, who are monsters disguised as men, as an equal—something that I thought no other man could do. And he still seemed to be normal! He actually seemed to have common sense like the rest of world—again, when not in the presence of girls—but that was still more then I could say for Luffy who would tell you anything you wanted to know at the drop of a hat and Zoro who got lost just trying to find the toilet on the ship for our first few weeks together.

I don’t know when those feelings started turning into something else, but I finally realized it during our trip to Skypiea when I, uh, mistakenly thought that Sanji died after the creepy god-guy shocked him with lightning. It was a completely understandable mistake given the panic stricken state I was in, not to mention we were in the presence of a tyrannical would-be god. But the moment that Nami corrected me and I heard his heart beat under my ear I felt something more than just relief. I didn’t get time to think about it then, I had to protect Sanji and Nami, but later when I actually got time to sit down and ponder about it… Well, I don’t need to tell you again what I discovered, do I?

Anyway, there’s been a whole lot that’s happened since then, and even I’m surprised to admit that my feelings haven’t gone away—I mean with the way that Sanji treats me most of the time that masochist theory is starting to sound pretty plausible. Actually what freaks me out is that they’ve gotten even worse. Back when the crew was split up for two years, which was almost half a year ago now, I told myself that when we got back together things were going to be different. I was training just like the rest of them, they were going through a lot of changes. Sanji might not even be the same person anymore.

And when I saw him again, he had changed, a lot. So did my feelings. The damn things got stronger. And I’ve been coping with it. I am pretty good at wiggling my way out of sticky situations and I’ve managed to keep this little crush completely under wraps. Nobody’s been the wiser… ‘cept a certain nosey red head that’s apparently known about this since before Sabaody and keeps trying to meddle.

I keep telling her I’m fine with the way things are. The moment I let the fact that I L-l..Lovv—…um, _really like_ Sanji loose, he really will hate me. Right now we have a decent relationship. He slips me snacks and I trade him scandalous images that I’ve drawn of Nami and Robin in anything from swim suits to bunny girl costumes. It’s a win-win situation. I get snacks and some extra time to talk to him in which he compliments my artistic skill to my heart’s content and he gets… more material to jerk off to…

Which brings us back to our current moment in time where this thought propels me to slam my head against the table we’re sitting at, mashing my nose, but my ego hurts more than that. It goes unnoticed because most of the crew is trying to stop the fight that’s gone a bit further than a brawl. The only ones who might have noticed are the female members; I am not so sure that I care whether they notice or not since they both seem to be in the know. It seems they’ve both been watching me, which if anything does bother me ‘cause if anyone notices them paying me extra attention, especially Sanji, there are going to be a lot more questions asked besides Luffy’s.

Nami finally looks away from me and goes to stop the fight— _her way…_ When I see the way that Nami beats him up, I start wondering who’s the real masochist on our ship, me or him?

After everyone’s calmed down and sitting back at the table, Sanji’s still saying that Robin needs to have someone—besides “ _worthless”_ me and ouch that hurts—to stay behind to help her. Nami’s tired of hearing it and I can just tell from the look on her face. She finally seems to relent.

“Fine than. If it will make you feel better; Robin, Usopp, _and Sanji_ will stay behind on the island—”

““ _What!?_ ””

I clap my hands over my mouth before I can say anymore—everyone’s kind of curious why my outburst was even louder than Sanji’s, especially Sanji, who’s eyeing me funny—but Nami keeps it rolling, never missing a beat, and saving my bacon again by continuing unfazed which brings everyone’s attention back to her.

“—have sufficient backup until the rest of us get back.” She glances at me with a smile that she thinks makes her look cute, but just makes my knees start shaking under the table and a shiver run down my spine. If this is her idea of somehow deepening the bond between me and the cook that’s staring at her with big pink hearts for eyes, she can keep it to herself. I don’t need it.


	2. Building Bridges or Building Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Usopp

Robin says she knows who we’re looking for. I trust her and all, but at the same time I’m not so sure, since I _don’t_ know and she’s not sharing anything. Sanji seems eager enough to follow her without asking for any more details. He just keeps going on and on about how Robin looks good with short blonde hair. It’s part of her disguise for sneaking into the base, and I’ll admit that she does look nothing like herself. In hindsight, Sanji and I were probably the best ones suited for this just because neither of our wanted posters look much like us, since I was dressed as Sogeking in mine and Sanji’s is, well, Sanji’s is an abstract sketch that should have never seen the light of day, and let’s just leave it at that…

All Robin has told us is that there’s a scientist, a professor from a university, coming to the island to work on a special project that’s top secret within the marine base. It’s common knowledge in the town that the woman’s arriving today, but it seems that no one, not even the marines, actually knows what she looks like. Robin say’s that she’s not only heard of this scientist, but been to one of her lectures before and is positive she can find her. The plan was to tie her up and put her on another boat set to leave as a stowaway so by the time she gets back here, we’ll already be long gone with our new treasure. It’s easy, right? Well, I would feel just the tiniest bit better if I had a description. You know, so I could help.

“Why doesn’t anyone know what this woman looks like?” I ask, at least wanting the reason why not even the marines have a picture of her.

Robin’s sitting on bench that encircles a fountain in the middle of the town’s square with her eyes closed and her wrists crossed, combing over the docks using her Akuma no Mi. Sanji shoots me a look that makes me take a step back.

“Don’t use that cynical tone with the lovely Robin-chan. Leave her be so she can use her beautiful mind to concentrate!” Sanji barks like a guard dog.

Robin chuckles lightly. “It’s okay Sanji-san. Professor Bacari has a very strong case of photogophobia and has since she was a child. The only people that truly know what she looks like are people that have met her and this is her first time venturing into the Grand Line, so I doubt many people know her face.”

I don’t question Robin’s insight on the woman—I know better than to ask about where she gets this stuff. I just put my hand on my chin and nod. “Oh. Well that makes a lot of sense. Why didn’t you just say that in the first place?”

Robin merely titters, but Sanji’s still glaring at me. I expect to hear him start yapping at me about how I dare to undermine “Robin- _chwan_ ’s” judgment, when Robin cuts him off. “Found her.”

She stands up and heads towards the docks. Sanji’s right on her heels, but I’m struggling to get my backpack back on. It’s full of all the stuff I thought might come in handy and the communication equipment. The bag’s pretty big. Not nearly as big as the one I had when I left home, but it still sticks out a good three feet from my person in all directions.

Just my luck, I lost sight of them and end up wandering around lost for a bit like a certain notorious pirate hunter turned pirate. I find them in a darkened alleyway, which partly explains why it was so hard for me to find them, and squeeze myself and my huge backpack through the narrow opening. It seems that they’ve mostly wrapped things up, not that I should talk like kidnapping is just an everyday chore or somethin’. Sanji’s kneeling behind the woman and tying off the ropes, making sure they’re secure. I’d say that we’re lucky that nobody knows what this Bacari woman looks like, ‘cause Robin might not look quite like herself, but Professor Bacari is half her height. Where Robin’s tall and slender, Bacari is petite and curvy. The only visual similarity is that Robin and her are sporting the same platinum blonde bobs.

“We should be able to leave her on that spice trader’s ship on the far end of the dock. They’re departing rather soon. They’ve got clearance from the marines to get through their check point and it’s highly unlikely that Professor Bacari will find the means to return in time to disrupt the plan,” Robin says, all rather coolly.

I have to admit, I kind of feel sorry for the woman. She looks positively terrified as she stares up at Robin. She throws me a glance, her eyes beggin’ me to help her, but that’s a no go, ‘cause we need her out of the way so Robin can sneak in, ‘cause otherwise how is she going to get any access to the base without some kind of alias. When I turn to Robin and ignore her, I don’t have to be the genius I am to know that Bacari’s more petrified than ever knowing I’m not here to save her. She starts whimpering and she’s shaking like a leaf, and before I can say anything about how 'wouldn’t it be kinder to her if we knocked her out', Sanji cuts in and starts comforting her in his typical fashion.

He goes into his full swooning mode right there kneeling in this dark and dirty alleyway telling her that not only are we not going to harm her, but that he could never dream of laying a finger on her himself. He says things like she doesn’t need to be scared ‘cause he won’t let anything happen to her—which is a lie if _I’ve_ ever heard one, ‘cause if he hasn’t noticed, _we are kidnapping her_. He goes on to tell her that even though she’s all tied up and gagged, she’s still as lovely as a vision that makes his heart race and the tears in her eyes make his same heart feel like it’s breaking. He’d probably have kept going if Robin hadn’t reminded him that we’re a little short on time. Besides, I think his rambling was just creeping the poor woman out more.

 I’m relieved that Robin stopped him ‘cause despite the fact that I know better, I’ve got this nasty twisting feeling in my chest watching all that. I know it’s stupid to have any kind of jealousies in this kind of situation, and I surprise myself sometimes with how unbothered I normally am with Sanji’s flirting. I think it’s because I know that’s just the way he is with all women and it’s never serious, not even with Nami and Robin who he gives more attention to than strangers because, if anything, the whole crew’s like a family. But when he slips completely into his stupid Casanova phase it makes me want to look away so I can preserve some of the respect that I still have for him as a man and preserve my own self dignity as another _stupid man_ that fell for him. It still hurts, but what can I do? Stop having these strange feelings for him? I can’t regrettably, I’ve tried. So I do the next best thing and lie.

Not batting an eye, Sanji swoops down and picks the woman up, bridal style, and starts carrying her towards the ship that Robin’s specified. “I’ll return shortly, my dear _Robin_ -chwan, just as soon as I deposit the mademoiselle somewhere where she’ll be comfortable until the crew finds her.”

Robin and I stay behind in the shadows, and I’m hoping that he doesn’t bring that much attention to himself, when I feel Robin’s eyes on me—well not literally though, ‘cause when she does make her eyes appear on my skin it creeps me out and gives me goose bumps. I look at her as she asks, “Are you alright, Usopp-kun?”

I shake my head, snapping myself out of reliving the last time Robin summoned one of her eyes on my shoulder and turn back to her again. “Uh, y-yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

She smiles at me with that knowing look that I’ve been getting accustomed to her giving me and turns back to stare after Sanji as he jumped on to the near empty deck of the spice ship and then disappears somewhere below deck. “I was just wondering how you were holding up while you watched our cook fawn over professor Bacari.”

I take a few steps back, my jaw dropped open as I point an accusing finger at her. “Ha! I knew that you knew about it!”

Robin chuckles again, despite the fact that I’m not amused.

“How did you figure it out?” I demand. “Was it Nami; she tell you?”

She looks again at me, still smiling. “No, I believe I figured it out on my own—”

“How?!” How did she figure it out when I’ve been working so hard to hide it? Nami just happened to overhear me freaking out about it once when she walked in on me in my workshop aboard the Sunny, coming to demand I fix something on her Clima-Tact ‘cause one of the dials was malfunctioning. I thought besides the fact that I needed to install some locks on that door, I’d done a really amazing job of keeping my thoughts to myself.

Robin just gives me that knowing smile again and says, “It’s not easy to hide your feelings around the one you love.”

My face feels like someone’s lit a fire right next to it. I don’t know whether to sputter about how I don’t know what she’s talking about or to pull my hat further over my face and think up some new, creative and awesome way to kill myself so that they’ll never find my remains. I manage to settle for a pretty good mix of both.

I dread hearing what she might say next, but then Sanji’s back and I silently thank Robin that she’s got enough mercy to not say any more about this. The last thing I want is for the man of the hour to learn about it. Bad as it is, he sees how red my face is and asks what’s going on. Thinking on my toes, I launch into a story about how I’ve been training myself to eat these Mondo spicy peppers recently and while he was gone I was telling Robin about them and offered her one. Then, I tried this really big one, but it was way hotter than the others and my tongue feels like it’s on fire now. And. I. Need. WATER!

I quickly shrug off my backpack and dig around in it looking for my canteen—adding a look of desperate urgency—to make my story all that more believable, and when I find the water, I chug a few mouthfuls before coming back up for air. Sanji’s looking at me like I’m crazy and I’m worried he’s going to call me out on it, but he just turns to Robin and asks if she ate the pepper I offered her and if she might need water too. She smiles and neither confirms or denies my story, which is fine as long as it’s not the truth.

Sanji doesn’t seem to care after a moment, because we’re moving again. Now that the professor is out of the way, there’s nothing really keeping Robin from trying to gain access to the marine base. On our way towards the entrance—Robin’s got a plan on how to get in—I kinda get the urge to ask somethin’ that’s been on my mind for a while now since I heard that she was sneaking in disguised as a scientist.

“Hey Robin,” I call up from behind her.  She looks over her shoulder at me. “What exactly did the marine base want with Professor Bacari?”

“I’m not entirely sure,” Robin admits, which makes me nervous all of a sudden, ‘cause doesn’t that mean that her whole façade isn’t truly complete? “I know that Professor Bacari’s major involves the study and history of the sea, the ocean itself. But besides that, I’ve only got some theories on what the marines might want with her. Whatever it is, she came here to study it willingly.”

When we get to the entrance of the base, Sanji and I hang back, hiding behind some shrubbery and large rocks, and out of sight. Some guards stop Robin at the gate. She’s carrying some light luggage and looks like she knows what’s she doing as she asks where the escorts were when she arrived at the docks. She tells them her alias—that’s she Professor Bacari—and that she’s a little disappointed that she had to find the base all by herself. The guards stumble over what to say and I can only imagine that the real Professor would appear like a frail doll next to her confident imposter. After calling up to their superiors on a den den mushi behind them, they apologize and claim that their superiors did send someone to escort her, but they were confused and didn’t know who they were looking for despite the intel about her having short blonde hair, which Robin has. Silly that that’s the only physical feature they have on the woman, but lucky again, ‘cause anymore might have given Robin away. Robin says she’s not all that upset about it, but she’s feeling a little sick because she’s never been at sea this long and really would like to get to her quarters and rest.

Robin’s a brilliant fabricator, practically on par with myself. When the door’s close behind Robin and one of the guards that’s leading her in, I release a breath I’ve been holding with a sigh of relief. The first part of the job is done and now I have to get somewhere where I can set up the equipment.

As I turn around, I’m falling over Sanji, who’s kneeling on his hands and knees looking like he’s just learned for a fact that there is no All Blue. I apologize quickly, but Sanji doesn’t seem to care about me at the moment.

“How are we supposed to save Robin-chan if we are out here?” He asks kind of hollowly. I roll my eyes and slap the palm of my hand against my face.

“Of course Robin was supposed to sneak in alone. Weren’t you paying attention when Nami was going over the plan?” I say, going ahead and not hiding how frustrated I am. Thinking back, Sanji probably was too busy staring at Nami to actually hear what she was saying, so why am I asking?

Sanji looks up at me confused. “Then what are the two of us supposed to do out here?”

I sigh and adjust the straps of my backpack, really hoping nothing was damaged when I tripped. I think about how to respond to him, because thinking about how much money I brought with me, I don’t think I have enough belies to pay for both of us to stay in a nice inn like I planned and pay for enough food. I don’t have a lot of time to waste, ‘cause I wanted to get the communicator set up and check in with everyone before sunset. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of options for us until I remember something I heard from a girl with freckles working in town. I’d been looking for cheap, but nice places to stay. She told me about a few inns and a nice bed and breakfast, but she also mentioned an abandoned shack on the far edge of town. Given that even though Sanji and I aren’t recognizable standing on our own, the two of us coming and going from a place in town might draw too much suspicion to us. I mean this is a marine town with wanted posters everywhere. This shack’s starting to sound like the better option. Yeah, I just need to remember where that girl said it was. And then I remember that I had her draw me a map on the back of a napkin. I scramble for my shoulder bag and pull it around, fighting with the straps of my heavier backpack, open the latch and start digging for it.

Sanji seems to have pulled himself together and has stood up. He’s pulled out his cigarettes and started smoking by the time I’ve found the crumpled up napkin.      

“Got it!” I shout excitedly

“You’ve got what?” he asked dryly and I flinch at his tone, which I try to cover up, pretending like I’ve got an itch on my arm.

“It’s a map that one of the town’s people drew me to a rundown shack on the edge of town,” I smile, proud of myself that I’m as prepared as I am and that my reconnaissance yesterday was fruitful. I kind of hope that Sanji’ll notice all my hard work too.

He cocks his one visible curly brow at me. “A rundown shack?” he asked me skeptically. “Is that where you plan on us staying?”

He doesn’t look happy, but I nod, jumping right back to defend my decision. “We stay there, it’s a lot less likely that people will recognize us and we can probably save our money. And—”

“And you would rather be as far away as you can from a town full of marines and their families, right?”

Well, yeah, that is a good point that I hadn’t gotten to yet, but I was going to say that we could afford more food and I thought Sanji would be happy to hear that, but he seems more irritated now, and says, “Just get us there already”, so I drop it and start walking as I unwrinkled the map and start looking for landmarks.

~~.~~

Even though this is a summer island, it seems that they get a lot of flash storms and stuff ‘cause by the time we find the shack, it’s raining like the entire island of Skypiea’s having plumbing problems, and is flooded. Sanji’s even taken off his jacket and is using it as a make shift umbrella for himself, grumbling curses even as the rain puts out his new cigarette. When we see the shack and I point it out to Sanji, he curses again and I don’t blame him ‘cause the building looks a little more crumbly then I thought it'd be. The girl made it sound like a place fishermen used to store equiptment.

We run for it not caring if we get any wetter now that the rains soaked through our clothes, thoroughly drenching us.

The door’s stuck fast when we get to it and I have a hard time with the knob, when Sanji comes up behind me and kicks the door down. It falls to the floor of the shack with a soggy thud. I sigh, thinking that’s one way to open a door, but I’ll have to probably fix it later. Inside it’s dark and I rummage around in my shoulder bag for a light dial. I point it into the room and it appears that the roof in here is almost as porous as one of Sanji’s colanders. I hear Sanji make a disgruntled noise and turn the dial towards him. He glares at the room.

“Well this place looks like shit.” He turns to me. “You expect us to stay _here_ for a month?”

I stumble around for the right words. It might just be a better idea to turn back now and go to an inn for the night, we’re already wet enough that it doesn’t matter if we head back out into the rain, but I need to set up the equipment now or everyone back on the Sunny might get anxious when I don’t check in. I manage to make my answer sound pretty convincing, if not a bit confident, as I say, “Yeah, I do. Don’t worry about the leaks right now—they can be fixed tomorrow—I need to find a dry spot to set up the communication system and the cola power generator for it that Franky made.”

Sanji grumbles some more colorful curses and finally walks in. After looking around for a while, the two of us find a dry patch against a wall. I put the dial in my mouth to hold it steady and I take off my pack setting it along the wall and start digging around inside.

“What are we going to do about a place to sleep, genius?” he asked sarcastically as I find what I’m looking for. I hand him the two water resistant tarps that I packed. I take the dial out of my mouth and hand it to him too.

“Make a lean-to with one of these. We can use the other one to sleep on. I don’t think the water will soak through it.” Not with the oil I’ve used to make them. I put on my head lamp that I packed, power the light, and start digging around my pack again.

Sanji looks down at the tarps and light dial in his hands then starts to say, “Hey, Mr. prepared. You got any ro—”

I toss him a coil of rope before he can finish. I don’t have to time to help him and I’m sorry about that, but I got to get this set up and ready, ‘cause it’s about time Robin checks in and I don’t want to miss her.

I finally get everything set up and have the generator working just in time. Robin’s face appears on the screen the moment I flick it on.

˹Usopp-kun, can you hear me?˼ The camera dial on her wrist model magnifies her face kind of funny, but the image is coming in pretty strong.

“Yes, Robin. You’re coming in fine.” I’m really happy that this is working as well as I hoped it would. “How are things on your end? Have you figured out what they wanted Professor Bacari for yet?”

She smiles and shakes her head. ˹No, not yet. I think they will be informing me on the details of her research tomorrow. For now, how are things with you and Sanji-san?˼ she says with her usual calm tone.  

I gulp. “We’re fine for now. We found shelter though it’s a little rundow—”

“Robin-chwan, is that you? You’re looking lovely as always~” Sanji pounces over me, smiling like an idiot at the screen.

“S-sanji,” I mutter from under his weight. “The camera’s over here. She can’t see you if you just talk to the screen.”

Sanji moves himself off of me and Robin chuckles. ˹Well it looks like everything is going well there. I’ve got to go have dinner with the captain, so I have to leave. Tell everyone else that I said hi.˼ And then just like that, she’s gone and the screen in front of us is grey. 

Sanji looks at me darkly. “What did you say to make Robin-chan hang up like that?”

My eyes get big and I try to defend myself quickly. “I didn’t say anything. She probably really does need to go have dinner with this captain guy.” _And it was probably your stupid gushing that made her hang up_ , I add in the safe confines of my own head. I wanted to ask her more about how the communicator is working for her.

All the same, Sanji seems pacified enough with my response and sits next to me in front of the screen. “You’re going to call the crew next on this thing right?” he asks.

“Uh yeah. I’m going to tell them that Robin got in alright and that we’ve got a place set up here,” I say working the dials on the right side of the screen to the frequency that we have the communicator on the Sunny set for.

“Tch, I don’t know if I can stand staying in this shit hole for a whole month,” he grumbles.

I smirk, ‘cause—curse my nature—I find the look on his face actually cute—which you don’t normally hear being said about a man with a soul patch, but Sanji makes it work.

“Don’t worry about it. We can start fixing it up in the morning and then it won’t seem so bad.”

“Heh, you think,” he says, finally smiling at me and my heart starts to do that rib shattering thing again.

I gulp again, “Y-yeah, I do.”

But then the screen flicks to life and the first thing we see is Nami’s bikini covered boobs in a camera dial and Sanji falls backwards, the pressure from his nose bleed propelling him, ‘cause Nami’s got the camera at such an awkward angle. _Why’s she even handling it in the first place?_ I think. I thought that Franky and I were going to handle communications. My face it beet red and I speak into the mic. begging her to move the camera.


	3. Raising Barriers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Sanji  
> > Usopp  
> > Sanji  
> in that order.

I was right in the middle of one of my favorite dreams—not the one where I finally find the All Blue and prove its existence to everyone in the world or the dream where I finally impress that stupid old geezer and have him on his knees kissing my feet, but definitely a very special dream all the same—when I feel water splash my face. Not the way I like waking up in the morning or on any other occasion. The instinct to fight back is like a kick of adrenaline and I’m sitting up ready to hurt someone. But something’s definitely off. The room’s fucking foreign to me and for a moment I wonder if I’ve been shanghaied. My brain’s on high alert as I try to get my bearings until I see _his_ face. _Shit, that’s right_ , I remember. I’m stuck on this shitty island while the other’s play treasure hunter and poor Robin-chwan’s putting her life at risk for the rest of our crew. I’m trapped in a Hell with the ship’s sniveling sniper. _Great,_ this is going to be one of the longest months of my life.

Usopp utters a stuttered “Uh, g-good morning Sanji.” He looks ridiculous, his hair’s an explosion of curls—bedhead is an understatement for this guy—and I wonder why the Hell he bothered to change into his pajamas last night. The reason he brought them at all, is beyond me...Although I will admit, if anything, Usopp’s always prepared for pretty much every occasion. From those tarps he miraculously pulled out of that mini-storage unit he was carrying around on his back all day, to the blanket he gave me when I vaguely mentioned I sleeping on the bare trap with nothing. I was watching him unrolling his sleeping bag. I wouldn’t be surprised if the bastard had an industrial fridge in there, though that’s probably asking too much of the guy.

All I can think about now though is how bad I want a cigarette and a cup of coffee. The former’s an easy fix—I reach behind me blindly for my jacket and grab my pack from the pocket and I thank whatever god is out there that they’re not damp—But the latter’s going to take some work. I don’t have anything to make coffee with and since Usopp’s not the most fond of it, I don’t think he’s going to pull the stuff to make a warm mug of it out of his bag for me. I could go into town and get—

I look up at the gurgling sound that I know all too well as the sound of a stomach announcing that it needs nourishment. It’s not mine, though I won’t deny that I am hungry, so I know it’s Usopp’s. He’s looking at me innocently, and trying to laugh it off as he shrugs, announcing the obvious, “I-I guess I’m hungry.”

 _No shit Sherlock_. But I don’t have anything to make you right now. Fuck, what kind of cook am I?

“God Usopp, sometimes you’re as bad as Luffy,” I say just to fill the air and because his stomach growling makes me flashback to the Sunny and I hope that those idiots _and Nami-swan_ are okay. I made enough frozen dishes to last them a month and enough fresh produce that they can make sandwiches and snacks to tie them over, right? Oh, who the fuck do I think am I kidding? My kitchen’s going to be shot for shit when I get back. I shake my head wanting to run my fingers through my hair. _Fucking great_ way to wake up in the morning, Sanji, I tell myself.

I look up and see Usopp scrambling over to that huge bag of his and almost actually smirk as he just avoids landing one of his kneecaps in a large pool of water on his way over. He fiddles around over there and I’m half hoping that he does magically pull out a thermos of hot coffee, but I know I’m getting my hopes too high. He comes back with a plastic bag and reaches into it excitedly, handing me something that looks like a candy bar. I’m almost willing to accept it as another form of the caffeine I need to jumpstart my system before I realize it’s not a candy bar. I’ve seen shit like this before. It’s a goddamn waste of food, that’s what it is. I take it, because he’s handing it to me, but I wouldn’t eat this shit if you paid me. I watch him peel back the wrapper and take a large bite out of it, enjoying the comical look on his face as he tastes it. Usopp’s a funny character. His antics usually brighten my mood, even if I don’t tell him so. Maybe I should sometime…

I turn back to the offensive piece of trash in my hands and read over the ingredients list on the back. Half the stuff listed here, I’m pretty sure neither of us could pronounce, and there’s enough preservatives in this thing to keep a corpse looking fresh for weeks. These things could out last the World Government. I look over at him, cocking an eyebrow.

“Do you have any idea what’s in these things?” He’d get more nutrients eating the dirt outside.

“Uh, protein?” he offers trying to feign innocent.

I blink at him. “Yeah, there’s that, along with a lot of other shit that you shouldn’t be forcing yourself to eat,” I say even as he’s still coercing himself into taking another bite. I want to grab the shit and throw it as far away from him as possible. I would rush out and get him something better to eat if he would just stop. It’s sad to watch. “Where did you even get these anyway?”

“I bought them a real long time ago,” he admits sheepishly, and I’m not surprised. I can image the circumstances of some salesman telling him that they’re great as emergency rations or something and that only the best adventures or whatever have them; at least that’s the lines I would use to sell him this shit.

“You waste your money on shit like this,” I say standing up and grabbing my jacket off the floor to bring it with me. I need to get us both something to eat before my own stomach starts growling. But I don’t know how much money he has and I know I don’t have a lot. I think that’s something that slipped my mind when I was packing the night before last. Maybe I should get a temporary job or something. I sigh, _Great_ , _more work_. I look back over. He’s still sitting on his sleeping bag, his eyes on me. “You know, you’re always buying useless shit.”

I kind of regret picking on him, because I can see him getting defensive—“Hey, I only buy the stuff I need,” he argues back—but I’m compelled to keep arguing with him.

“Yeah, after the salesman tells you you need it.” He needs to stop being such an easy mark.

He doesn’t say anything as he looks away. He knows I’m right, but I also know I really haven’t won anything. He looks so vulnerable and this really isn’t anything like picking on the marimo back on the ship. That idiot would raise the roof and keep opening his shitty mouth, Usopp’s just going to sit there and take it the moment the fights left him.

“Ugh,” it’s too early for this. I take the cigarette out of my mouth and scratch at the side of my head with the same hand. “Do you have any real food?”

He looks down at the half eaten garbage in his hands and offers it up to me with an apologetic smile and I feel like he hasn’t heard a word I just said. _I said real food, you idiot_ , I think as I roll my eyes.

“’Tch, fine. I guess I’ll go see about getting some. It’s not like I could cook anything here anyway.” This place doesn’t look like even the structure would be enough kindling to toast a piece of bread, let alone house a stove or anything salvageable.

“Uh, Sanji…?” he starts, but the longer I wait, the more hungry the two of us are going to get. I can already feel the first signs of stomach pains.

I walk over to the door—or what’s left of it after I kicked it down yesterday—and move it aside. “I’ll be back later,” I say giving him a wave over my shoulder. I know I haven’t given myself a good look-over today. I probably look no better than Usopp right now, God forbid worse since I slept in my suit. It’s probably all wrinkled. I need to get to a bathroom and a mirror and at least fix my hair and wash my face. I wander into the town with a lot on my mind. First, coffee—I need the energy boost—then clean myself up a bit, and then I have get to work on procuring some food for Usopp and myself. The question now is where… or is it how? Shit, whatever.

The town’s pretty active for it being so early in the morning—probably because it’s nestled in the shadow of a marine base, early risers and all. Which reminds me that it _is_ really early… And that long-nosed idiot was awake before I was. What the Hell is wrong with me? I must have been really exhausted yesterday if I allowed myself to sleep in later than that languishing dolt.

A lot of what I walk by are produce stalls and I see everything from the first catch of the day to truffles—and that all looks really appetizing and right up my alley and I remind myself that I have to come back here later and pick some stuff up to make dinner—but right now I need to thoroughly wake up and it’s not long before I find a nice little café with a couple of tables and chairs sitting around out front under colorful umbrellas. I should be able to get a decent cup of coffee here so I pull out a chair from a table and fall back into it.

I’m out here for a while, holding my head up because if I don’t get something in me soon, sitting out here in the warm morning sun is going to put me back to sleep. My face slips from my grasp and I nearly hit my chin on the table at the sound of a voice that’s as soothing as a well-played melody. “I’m sorry sir, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave. We’re not allowed to serve hung-over bums here.”

At a glance, her clothes would mark her as no different than any other member of the food service class—her black slacks, white buttoned blouse, and simple cut apron—but her person lying beneath those belittling rags is far more beautiful than words alone can make right. From her slender ankles that peek out from the bottoms of her trousers to her almond shaped brown eyes that aren’t unlike my precious Nami’s. Her strawberry blonde hair is all pulled up into a pretty ponytail with frail little baby-hair curls refusing to relent and settling around her gorgeous nape. Her most rememberable feature for sure is her freckles, for I have only seen their likeness once and I could never possibly forget them. It’s like an artist spent hours doting every visible inch of her lovely fair skin. As I soak up her beauty, my cruel body and senses are betraying me. All I can focus on is the faint scent of fresh brewed coffee that is wafting off of her like the smell of sea salt near the ocean.      

“Please mademoiselle,” and she blinks at me with this cute bewildered look as she takes a step back. “Would you kindly ignore my weathered appearance? I… I… I could really use a cup of coffee.” I realize I’m so out of it that I can’t even shower this woman with the complements she deserves. “Please,” I add again. “I have the money to pay.”

She looks at me curiously and I can tell she’s judging me with her elegant eyes, deciding whether she’ll take my order or tell her manager and have me escorted off the premises. I would never blame such a lady if she chose the latter.

But no. The girl is truly an angel and she comes back with a pearly white mug full of a dark, earth-toned brew that’s still steaming, cream and sugar packets on the side of the saucer underneath it. From the moment it touches my tongue, I can tell that they buy their beans pre-ground, but I’d take most anything at this point.

The lovely speckled lady stays long enough to watch me finish and when I’m done, before she can ask, I pull out the few beli notes I have in my pocket. Seeing that I’m not going to rip her off anymore, she finally graces me with a smile full of teeth pearlier than the mug and makes an attempt at small talk as she refills my cup.

“You look like you had a rough night, sir.”

It feels weird to have the lovely address me so distantly, so I moved to give her my name, but I am reminded by some part of my brain that is refusing to shut up and simply bask in her beauty that I’m supposed to be covert right now. I pause long enough to listen and I’m glad, because if my cover were blown, I would not only be putting myself in danger, but jeopardizing Robin-chan’s mission… oh, and uh, probably getting the long-nose back at the shack in trouble too, I guess. I need to come up with something, even though I would hate to lie to the lovely lady.

“Please, mademoiselle, call me..Ji-..Jin.” The stall was not thought out very well, but she gives me an amused smile.

“I see, Jin,” she says my fake name with a laugh in her lovely voice. “Care to tell me why you look like you slept outside?”

I sigh, embarrassed, but the lady did ask. “That’s not so far from the truth actually. Between getting caught in the rain in the middle of nowhere and sleeping on a tarp, I’m probably marring your café’s reputation with my presence.”

Her lovely face goes from a humored smile, to sympathetic understanding. “Oh, shit. You were caught in that last night?” She covers her mouth with freckled fingers as she catches herself. “I mean, uh, I’m sorry. Uh, would it help if I lent you our employee’s washroom?”

The girl is not merely an angel. _She is a goddess_.     

 

The first thing I set about doing is fixing the door. It’s pretty thick and luckily it didn’t break. It was the screws in the frame that did it. The threads were completely ripped off and they’re rusted beyond reuse, the actual hinges weren’t far behind. Luckily, I have an assortment of screws in my shoulder bag and a few of them should do the trick. While working on getting the hinges off the door, I remember a solution that I made not too long ago that worked wonders on rust, though its initial purpose had been an acid that would dissolve metal and not wood. It failed, but I did find another useful purpose for the concoction. And it’s not that hard to make more with some of the chemicals I’ve already got. After I make a huge gallon of it, I take the hinges and drop them into the basin full of the stuff out back behind the shake, ‘cause if I use this stuff inside, I don’t think Sanji will ever be convinced to come back inside. The smell of this stuff could peel paint.

From back here I can see that the back wall of the shack’s actually carved out of stone, which is curious given that the other three walls are made of wood. After further investigating, I realize that the back wall of the house is part of a kitchenette and the wall itself is a brick oven carved out of the stone. This place isn’t just a shack, but actually a really cool rundown cottage. You can’t really see any of this cool stuff though ‘cause there’s a lot of old junk just stacked up against this back wall. I’m more then sure that I’m better off just cleaning it out of here than attempting going through it. I don’t know how many people have squatted here before us.

While clearing it away I find more to this place. There’s a woodstove with four places to cook, even though it’s missing the hot plates. It’s made heavy so I can’t lift it. I try… and almost pull something in my back, so no, it’s staying where it is. I could probably find some hot plates for it in town if they have an antique store or something. There’s also a really deep sink with an old-fashion hand pump to get water to it. It would work too—it’s connected to a well under the house—... If the faucets weren’t full of rust and hard water buildup. _Shit_ , it's like everything’s still here, but it’s all half broken. I get a wrench out of my bag and work the faucet off and add it in with the door hinges out back. Eventually I get everything moved out of the way and I see that the brick oven’s got cast iron doors… that are also rusted. I’m grumbling to myself as I get to work trying to get the doors off too.

When I slip the doors in with the rest of the stuff out back it suddenly occurs to me that I’ve been working on the shack all morning. And I suddenly find myself on my hands and knees depressingly staring at the earth under my splayed fingers. I was going to spend this time working on my inventions. Not becoming a fix-it man for this neglected old dump. I know it’s going to be me and Sanji’s home for the next little bit, but seriously, what am I thinking?

A part of me pokes at the fact that this is home for a while. Sanji and me are going to be living here, right? It might not be such a bad idea to fix the place up. But then I argue, what’s the point in fixing it up if we’re going to leave eventually. That other part responses with the comment, it might make Sanji happy.

 _Shit_ , who do I think I’m kidding? Making this place look nice is not going to get Sanji to like me. Nothing is ever going to make Sanji love me the way that I—I need to stop this spiral that I’ve got myself stuck in. I’ve already had this particular conversation with myself many times before. This is the same one that Nami walked in on me having that got my secret blown in the first place. I know that Sanji is a ladies man, and the Love Cook. I know this and yet I keep pining for him anyway. I know that even though I’ve got some talent, it’s kind of like a jack-of-all trades kind of thing—master of none. And skills aside, I’m not all that good looking. I’m not handsome or charming, but even if I was remotely attractive that wouldn’t change anything because Sanji would never go for a guy. If anything, if I was a quarter as handsome as him, he’d probably see me as competition with the ladies and never talk to me at all. So maybe I should feel happy that I’m as plain looking— _plain_ , because I’m not going to touch the U word again—as I am, ‘cause at least he talks to me now. If you could call that talking.

I flash back to the conversation this morning….

~~.~~

_… “Um.. Uh, g-good morning Sanji.”_

_Sanji looks me up and down before groping around blindly behind himself for his discarded jacket from yesterday and gets out his cigarettes with a glum look to him. He sits there smoking without saying anything for a while. The silence is killing me and I open my mouth to say something just as my stomach growls. My arms wrap tightly around my belly as a reflex and Sanji looks at me, his one eye demanding me to tell him if I’m serious. I chuckle, but my throat goes dry like the deserts of Alabasta and I shrug. “I-I guess I’m hungry.”_

_Sanji sighs aggravatedly. “God Usopp, sometimes you’re as bad as Luffy,” he shakes his head as he looks away._

_I move over to my bag that’s by the communication system, carefully avoiding another puddle in the floor, and dig around inside it until I find a bag full of some food that I did think to bring with me. I come back over to him with the plastic bag in hand and pull out some candy bar shaped protein bars. I offer one of them over to him, and he takes it with this look on his face like I’ve just handed him something repulsive. I don’t know why he’s looking like that. I open mine and take a bite of it...only to potentially wish I hadn’t. These taste weirder then I thought it possibly could. It’s not really bad, but it’s not like anything I’ve ever eaten before and definitely not like the candy it resembles._

_Sanji’s sitting there reading the package and looks over at me as I gag, some of it going down the wrong pipe by mistake._

_“Do you have any idea what’s in these things?” he asks me, raising an eyebrow._

_“Uh, protein?” I offer with a smile._

_“Yeah, there’s that, along with a lot of other shit that you shouldn’t be forcing yourself to eat,” he say as I’m preparing to take another bite. “Where did you even get these anyway?”_

_“I bought them a real long time ago,” I admit, thinking to back to when I was in that adventure’s store back in Loguetown buying all kinds of cool stuff._

_“You waste your money on shit like this,” he says standing up. He sighs. “You know you’re always buying useless shit.”_

_I’m kind of offended. I do have every right to be, don’t I? “Hey, I only buy the stuff I need,” I argue back._

_“Yeah, after the salesman tells you you need it.”_

_I don’t know what to say for myself, ‘cause I know that he’s kind of right. I sit there thinking for a bit, looking down at my nose and avoid him until he makes a disgruntled noise and I look back up._

_“Do you have any real food?” he asks._

_I offer him the protein bar I’m still eating with an apologetic smile and he rolls his eyes._

_“’Tch, fine. I guess I’ll go see about getting some. It’s not like I could cook anything here anyway.”_

_“Uh, Sanji…?” I start, but he walks over to the door that’s leaning on the frame and kicks it aside and I can tell he’s in a bad mood._

_“I’ll be back later,” he says without looking back at me._   

~~.~~

“Yeah, he really likes talking with me, huh?”

 _Well maybe this is what you need. He talks to you just fine when you draw pictures of Nami and Robin for him_ …

“Yeah, and then he skulks off somewhere to put my artwork to good use, no doubt,” I grumble to myself.

_Okay, but this is different. You saw that kitchen in there. It’s probably just the thing to get him to really look at you. You could fix this place up and then he’ll see your skills. You’re not trying to seduce him, just lessening the gap between the two of you._

I know I should know better—Sanji and I are friends. JUST friends—but every once in a while I still give myself glimpses of hope...

 

I really fucked up. It’s already this late and I’ve forgotten about him all day. After the lovely lady—Windy, such a heavenly name like it pulls waves up from the surface of the sea—escorted me to the bathroom and I managed to clean myself up enough that it’s acceptable to be in her presence, I come out to find her waiting for me, which brought a very big smile to my face because such a lovely lady was waiting for _me!_ She smiled when she saw me as well and it only amplified her beauty. She walked back over to me with my jacket that I’d realize she’d ironed for me. Such a kind soul she is.

“You clean up pretty well,” she commented and I felt like my legs are turning to rubber even though I’m pretty sure I’ve never switched bodies with Luffy before. She moved forward to catch me even though I was not in any risk of actually falling. “You okay, Jin?” she asked with concern marring her features.

“Why yes Windy darling, I couldn’t be better,” I said, trying to reassure her.

Her lip quirked up in one corner and she gave me a cute little lopsided grin. “Okay, if you say so,” and she released me so abruptly, pulling away from me, and I almost really did lose my balance. I righted myself and she snickered, which I found completely charming.

“Hey,” she began, “I know this is a little sudden, but when you mentioned earlier that you needed a job, I went and talked to the owner and she says we’re hiring.”

“You did that for me, mademoiselle? _Mellorine!_ You are miraculously generous.”

She moves on, ignoring my praise without a reaction, and I admired her modesty. “It’s job as a waiter, like me. I don’t know if you have any experience with it, but it’s easy as Hell to pick up,” and she covered her mouth with her hands. “Sorry,” she apologized quickly. M’lady’s attempts to hide her cursing were so precious.

“There’s no need to worry about me, my dear Windy. I grew up in a restaurant in the East Blue.”

“Really,” she said with a curious smile as she removed her hands. “That’s pretty far out there, isn’t it? What brings you all the way to the New World in the Grand Line?”

Another opportunity where I have to watch what I say. “I came to this part of the ocean to improve my skills,” I lied, and feel rather abashed for it.

“And what skills would those be?” Windy-san asked me with another joking smile—

—and I couldn’t help smiling back at her loveliness. “Why I’m a chef, m’lady.”

“Oh,” she smirked. “I didn’t see that coming when you’re dressed up all snazzy like that,” she said as her eyes wander over me, my skin feeling like it was igniting. “Too bad we don’t need another cook right now, but waiters get to take home left-overs and the pay’s decent.”

“That sounds fabulous,” I said, too preoccupied by her presence to think better of what I was agreeing too.

“Great, then let’s go introduce you to the owner. She’s really curious when it comes to strangers on the island,” and the lovely lady took my hand and dragged me all the way to her boss, who’s apparently now my boss, who’s a lovely older woman with a grip that could break bones from the crunch I felt when she shook my hand.

I started work immediately and I couldn’t really complain, they gave me lunch and those leftovers the lady mentioned when my shift was over. But now, as I’m carrying them back towards that homely looking shack, I realize that while in the company of those lovely ladies and working alongside them, I’ve completely forgot about that stupid long-nose. He’s been back at that shack all day with nothing to eat but those shitty protein bars of his and what kind of cook am I if I can’t feed my own nakama. I look down at the takeout container in my hands as I sprint back to that shitty worthless shack and wonder how I’m going to apologize to Usopp. But as I approach, I recognize his familiar silhouette on the _roof_. He leans back on his heels, wiping at his head, and sees me before I can ask him what the Hell he’s doing?

“Hey Sanji! Didja get dinner?” he asks cheerfully.

“Uh, yeah. What are you doing up there?” I say as I see that there’s a lot of junk along one side of the shack that wasn’t there earlier.

“Well,” Usopp says shifting his balance and dusting his hands off on his pants. “I don’t have any wood and shingles to fix the roof right now, so I’m nailing the tarps down until I can fix it properly. That way, when it rains again, we can stay dry.”

Just from where I’m standing, I can see that he’s been working all day and I’m kind of surprised that he’s put so much effort into it. But as he’s climbing down from the roof using the boxes and junk along the side of the house as a make-shift stepstool—I hear his stomach growl and guilt rushes back into me. _Fuck_ , I’m an asshole—and the sound of his impatient digestion system startles Usopp enough that he loses footing and clumsily falls the last three feet to the ground, landing hard on his backside.

“Ow owow,” he says sitting up and rubbing his lower back. I don’t rush forward to help, because even though I should, I’m ashamed I forgot about him all day while he’s been working here. What kind of friend am I? “Hey,” he smiles sheepishly. “Let get back inside and eat. It’s about time that Robin called-in anyway.” 


	4. Outside the Fortress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Usopp  
> > Sanji  
> > Usopp  
> in that order.

I’m sitting there telling Franky about how easy it was to fix the roof shingles a couple of days ago and that that solution I used on the rust worked wonders and he’s asking me where I might of left some in my workshop when Nami comes in, out of nowhere, cutting him off and demanding he leave because she’s got something she needs to discuss with me. And when Franky says she can’t kick him out, she gives him this look that I can see though the camera dial and I’m somewhat sorry for Franky, but at the same time glad that I’m not actually in the room. Franky leaves, but I can still hear him muttering something about how it’s not fair that she throwing him out of his own workshop.

She suddenly turns on me and I’m worried for a moment that it’s my turn—Am I in trouble? She sighs and brushes her hair over her shoulder as she sits in a chair in front of the camera and adjusts it down a bit because Franky's just too tall. She clears her throat before quickly asking if Sanji’s here with me like it’s a sudden last minute thought.

I tell her no, he’s at the job he got and her shoulders noticeably relax. I think it’s because Sanji’s possibly gotten on her last nerve lately— _Finally,_ I might add—but then she asks something that makes my brain physically stop for a couple of seconds. When it starts up again, she asks the question once more as if to make sure I heard her.

˹Have you told Sanji you love him yet?˼

Even before she starts, I’m trying to smother the speaker ‘cause I heard her loud and clear the first damn time. I look over my shoulder and scan the room behind me ‘cause I’m half convinced Sanji’s standing somewhere behind me and heard everything Nami just said. I turn back to the camera and my voice is a short tight whisper ‘cause even though I know that he’s not here, and he doesn’t have ears on the walls like Robin, I’m scared that somehow Sanji’ll still manage to hear what I’m about to say and he’ll magically appear to kick my ass.

“Shut Up Nami!” I hiss. “I-I’m not going to tell Sanji I l-lo—I’m not going to confess to Sanji!!” I’m getting really fed-up with her meddling and I’m glad she’s far enough away that she can’t hit me for telling her off.

But she doesn’t seem to care that I just told her to shut it and I’m kind of irritated that she’s snickering into her hand as she’s looking back at me with her own knowing smile. ˹What’s the problem, Usopp? Can’t say the word ‘l-l-love’?˼ she says mockingly.

“I can when it’s not in _that_ context,” I grumble.

Nami sighs and stares at me sadly through the screen. ˹Come on Usopp. You’re not so much of a coward that you can’t even admit you love him just between the two of us. We both know the truth already.˼

I want to tell her to mind her own fucking business—her using the ‘coward’ card on me again—but I’m too busy dealing with the fact that I _am_ being a coward. I’ve got myself believing that if I don’t admit that I l-lu— _the L word_ for Sanji, that it won’t hurt as bad when it all falls through. I tell Nami as much.

She slaps her palm against her forehead. ˹You’re not seriously that naïve, are you?˼

I shy away from the camera. I know she’s right—she’s right about almost everything—but I’m still afraid to take that next step.

˹Come on Usopp˼ she says pulling my eyes back to the screen with her sincere tone. ˹You need to do something about this.˼

 _I am doing something_ , I think.

˹You need to get out there and make a move˼ she adds.

I sigh at her pushiness and my own chickenosity. “God, Nami. How do you even know if he likes me?”

˹I don’t˼ she says like it’s that obvious.

“Then why push me towards my own doom?” I’m pretty sure she knows the likely outcome of all this.

˹Because either way this ends, you’ll be able to move forward. Right now you’re stuck in this unrequited-love-limbo. If Sanji turns you down—˼

“You mean ‘when’.”

˹I mean ‘if’, Usopp. Really, you need more confidence in yourself. _If_ Sanji turns you down, you’ll be able to cut yourself free and move on.˼

I nod.

˹But if by some miracle he does like you back, you can actually start a relationship with him...˼

I can’t help the color that rises to my cheeks at the thought of such an amazing, yet impossible outcome. I’ve had a hard time imagining it since the beginning because the only face I’ve seen of a Sanji that’s being affectionate is when he’s noodle-dancing around girls and I don’t think I’d be comfortable with that being anywhere near me. Picturing something more romantic feels like it’s almost just as impossible.

When I glance back at the screen, Nami’s got this scary smile on her face. ˹What were you thinking about, Usopp?˼ She asks like she’s sharing a dirty secret.

It takes me a moment but then my face gets redder. “N-no! Nothing like that Nami!!”

˹Nothing like what?˼ she prods.

I glare at her despite the fact that my face is still hot. “You know what I mean.”

She laughs and I just hide my face in my arms. I’m tempted to cut the call short since she’s already kicked Franky out of the room—this was our call—and there seems little reason for me to keep talking to her, but Nami stops laughing and says she’s sorry and even though I know she doesn’t really mean it, I let her keep bothering me.

˹You know you’re really lucky that I gave you this opportunity with him—it's honestly quite charitable of me—You better not let my generosity go to waste.˼

Yeah, _generosity_ , she says. She just didn’t want to listen to Sanji complain about Robin’s situation anymore. She was simply pushing her problems on me and using my crush as an excuse. But if I don’t humor her now, she’s less likely to be merciful next time. Like when—not if! _When!_ —she figures out about the deal I have with Sanji and the pictures I’ve drawn him. She figures out I’m drawing her in scantily clothed images, she’ll start charging me royalties and back royalties for everything else I’ve drawn of her. And while I’m on the subject, I’d be willing to bet belies that Robin already knows about it. I wouldn’t doubt it if she has tabs on everything that happens on that ship. Her finding out about my crush all on her own only supports my theory that she’s got eyes and ears all over. Even when us guys are, uh... yeah.

˹Waste ‘a what?˼ Luffy asks as he suddenly pounces over the back of Nami’s chair and appears on the screen in front of me. I freeze, wondering how much he’s over heard. If Luffy knows it’s as good as everyone hearing me shout it over the loud speaker in the crow’s nest and I mean everybody. It wouldn’t be long before the marines know and our other enemies or the Heart pirates.

˹Luffy, get off!˼ Nami screams and Luffy quickly moves to get off her.

˹What were you guys talking about that you had to kick Franky out? He’s walking round the lawn deck all mad ‘cause your taking over his place˼ Luffy says in typical Luffy manner.

˹We were just talking about how lucky Usopp is to have Sanji all too himself.˼

I want to reach through the screen and strangle the woman before Luffy turns to the screen—Not the camera, _the screen_ , which gives me a lovely shot of his forehead—and starts yelling at it.

˹Yeah, Usopp’s real lucky. Usopp gets to have Sanji’s cooking all to himself and he doesn’t have to share.˼

Honestly, Sanji hasn’t cooked for me once since we got here. He doesn’t have the means to or the time really. And I’ve been hiding the unfinished kitchenette from him until it’s done. I want it to be a surprise.

I see Nami looking around Luffy’s body with a smile that says, ‘See? He didn’t notice a thing’. She may be calm about it, but my heart’s still hammering away in my chest.

˹Sanji’s gone˼ Luffy goes on. ˹And the only person he’s told the combination for the fridge to is Nami. And she... Oh yeah! Nami, I’m hungry! Can you go make lunch now?!˼

Nami moaned and I won’t lie—it made me feel a little better.

  

Now, I could never stand waiting tables—it’s one of the things I hated about how under staffed the Baratie was—but I’m pleasantly surprised at how much I’ve been enjoying working at the Finch Café alongside the lovely Windy-san. The way that she shoots down all of my advances reminds me fondly of my dear Nami-san. But she also has a boisterous side to her and comical persona which the nature of differs from that of my goddess of navigation. It’s sometimes as if the fact that we’re at work slips her mind, and she lets the odd curse slip or her adorable incoordination gets the better of her. She also likes to fiddle with whatever she can get her hands on during our breaks and lunch hour, though it’s usually misguided. Another amazing benefit to working the tables at this establishment is the bouquet of flowers that parade in every day. It has been over a week that I’ve been here and I think the number of lovelies that I see come in has only grown and it’s a jubilant struggle to keep my head about me when I’m on the floor.

That’s right, I realize as my hand freezes in the middle of wiping down a table; it has been over a week. I haven’t cooked anything in that long. And I would be telling myself a shitty lie if I said I haven’t missed it. Working the tables out here gives me plenty of time to talk and admire the fair maidens, but I miss my usual euphoria I get from chopping, sautéing, baking, and preparing meals, the looks of enjoyment I see on the faces of the people that eat my food.

I haven’t even made anything for Usopp yet. I’ve just been bring him back the chilled scraps from the kitchen day in and day out. I feel that I’m failing my job as our crew’s chief in that respects, though Usopp hasn’t said anything about it, not a word of complaint. Which has not lightened my guilt any. Usopp’s probably one of the few crew members that wouldn’t complain if the quality of my meals on the Sunny suddenly dropped—not that I would ever let that happen—but it’s well known among the crew that Usopp doesn’t often ask for more than what he’s given. A personality like that makes you want to give them more, you know. Or maybe I’m thinking too much. This is that cowardly shitty long-nose I’m talking about. I pick up the tray of collected crockery and start back to the kitchen.

But now that I mention that fool, that pathetic shack has been improving lately. After Usopp fixed the roof and the door, he’s been doing other things here and there to fix it up, even though he hasn’t really mentioned it. The other night I realized that the floorboards beneath my back were actually level. That might seem like something that should be normal, but the wood’s been warped and buckled or something in places because of all that rain and water damage and it’s been shit to sleep on. I don’t know how he fixed it without replacing the flooring, but it’s impressive to say the least.

When I walk into the kitchen I see the lovely Windy-san standing near the sink with a tray of her own and she looks breath taking as she smears suds on her forehead unintentionally as she rubs at her brow with the elegant back of her wrists. I deposit my tray next to her and swoop in to help.

“My lovely Windy-san, you should not be damaging you beautiful hands with this kind of work.”

She cocks an eyebrow at me and continues to work at the dish in her hands. “Why shouldn’t I? This is my job after all,” she smiles at me again. I’ve also noticed that she’s quick to smile.

“But a lady shouldn’t—”

“Not ta sound anti-modern and all, but dishes have always kind of been a woman’s job, haven’t they? You know some times I really think you’re—...” She stops and I’m uneasy that she might have developed a negative opinion of me somehow, but then she starts again. “Hey Jin, are you like the kind of guy that ‘likes his privacy’?” she says with a serious look on her face.

 _Fuck_ , is she on to our operation. There were those men coming in here the other day—bounty hunters that just arrived on the island—and they were flashing around wanted posters of our crew. None of these guys would stand a chance against any member of the crew, even Usopp, but they were acting up and asking questions. One of them even showed me that- _that thing_ —that horrible fucking image that’s been haunting me since the day that I saw it—and asked me if I’d seen them. It took... all I had not to crack his skull open on my knee cap. I managed to tell him that no, I hadn’t seen that disgusting image before, but inside I vowed that someday I would find this sketch artist and kick them to death.

Had _that_ somehow tipped off the lovely Windy-san? She did seem a bit brighter than quite a few other people.  

But before I could answer her, the owner opens the kitchen doors and calls for me. Now I can’t ignore a lady when she summons me, so I have to excuse myself with Windy-san, who seems to be studying me as I leave. I really do hope that she hasn’t caught on to it all. If Robin-chan gets exposed all on account of something I did, I could never forgive myself.

“Yes, Owner-san? What could I do for you?” The woman smiles at me. She’s probably twice my age or so, but she’s a woman that takes a lot of pride in her appearance which makes her shine quite dazzlingly.

“There’s a customer at one of the outside tables. Get him, would you? Ann and Negi are busy.”

“But of course ma’am.” I smile and head towards the outdoor dining area.

“Oh, and Jin?”

“Yes,” my body comes to an immediate halt and turns to face her stunningness.

“Windy says that you’re an aspiring cook. Maybe one of these days I’ll let you interview for the position and try your hand at impressing me,” she says like she’s offering a challenge, a confident smirk perches on her full lips.

“Yes ma’am. I’ll be looking forward to it,” I smile back, some of my normal bravado for my trade slipping over.

She excuses me and I resume heading toward the patio outside. _Finally_ , I have a chance to stand in a kitchen again and do what I do best. There’s not a doubt in my mind that the owner would like whatever I made for her. It would be better than what their current chief produces. Maybe I could even bring home some to Usopp and see if he’d notice the difference.

As I clear the doorframe, all thoughts of preparing a good meal for that idiot halt. I’m unsure of what I’m looking at, at first. It’s like catching that elusive cite of a blue moon; a form I’m not accustomed to seeing. Sitting in strictly casual clothes—a green shirt with a yellow star in the middle of the chest and tan khaki shorts—with eyes casted down as hand and writing utensil move rapidly over a semi-blank sheet of paper from a sketch journal that I’ve seen a number of times, I find myself more or less speechless. There’s quite a few things that tie the image to who I know it to be—like the dark mess of black curls that look slightly less unruly today than usual, that armband on his forearm, that hat and the headphones around his neck, and of all, that nose sticking out from under the brim. I’m just confused why... Why is he in town, why he’s sitting there drawing, and why he’s dressed that way.

“Usopp?”

He looks up like it’s an instinct reaction and when he sees me, his initial response is to jump in his chair—like I’ve spooked him—but then the look on his face shifts from startled to that of confusion.

“What are you doing here?” I ask.

“Uh, oh! I was getting some stuff,”—I notice the bags behind his chair for the first time. Some of them are pretty big—“and I was kind of hungry so I figured I eat something and-and.. and I didn’t know you worked here,” he says curiously.

“Yeah. I told you I was working at a restaurant in town,” and it’s after that I realize I’ve never actually told him where I was working. His being here probably is just that, a coincidence.

“I thought you’d be working in a kitchen,” Usopp asks, looking more confused.

I sigh. That is my preferred work space, yes. “No, right now I’m a waiter.”

“Oh,” he says with understanding. “That explains it.”

“Explains what?” I say cocking an eyebrow and expecting him to make some crappy joke about why I smell like dirty dishes when I get back late or something.

“Why the food you bring back never tastes just right,” he smiles with that silly poised grin of his. “It’s not yours.”

I’m kind of speechless for a second instead of responding with the typical smack over the back of the head and phrased “of course it’s not mine. I could never make something that bland”, and it’s ‘cause I’m kind of surprised that he’s noticed.

“Hey, it’s you again!” The lovely Windy-san is suddenly standing next to me, but I’m confused why she’s addressing Usopp. I’m just as surprised when Usopp responded back.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“So didja get a place in the end?” she asks and Usopp nods.

“Yeah, thanks for all the help.”

“You two know each other?” I couldn’t take any more of this parody. How did Usopp get to be acquainted with the lovely Windy-san?

“Sure, I gave this guy here advice a while back. What, you know him too, Jin?”

Usopp looks at me for a moment wearing a puzzled expression, but then his face lights up with understanding, though I wonder how much he actually understands.

“Uh, yes. He and I are, uh, staying together,” I admit, hoping that giving her this much information isn’t telling her too much.

“Really?” she says, arching her eyebrows. “Hmmm...What exactly is the nature of your relationship, if you don’t mind me asking?” And that fear about her being on to our true identities makes my train of thought derail.

“Why we’re brothers, of course,” Usopp says when I don’t say anything.

_What!?_

Windy-san has a similar reaction, which is only logical. Fashion sense aside, Usopp’s and my own appearance are as alike as night and day. What kind of lie is this?

“We have different moms,” Usopp adds.

“And different fathers,” I feel compelled to add myself. There’s no way I’m even going to pretend he’s related to me. Besides, simply having different mothers is not going to explain the very large gap in our genetics.

“Yeah,” Usopp admits, his voice dropping suddenly. “I-I’m adopted,” he says with a sad tone in his voice. “Jin here’s the only family I have left,” and for even a moment, I’m convinced by his mournful expression and melancholy disposition that’s come on rather suddenly within only the deration of a few sentences. Windy-san on the other hand is taken in completely.

“Are you serious,” she says, leaning on the table he’s sitting at.

“Yup. Jin and I had some falling outs at our last home and so the two of us left and started our lives at sea. You see,” he starts, almost bashfully, “he’s pursing his dream of being the words greatest chief and I’m here to cheer him on.”

“Wow!” Windy-san’s eyes are large with shimmering tears in the corners and she looks so cute as she hangs on to every word of Usopp’s bullshit story. “That sounds so romantic!”

“What!?” Usopp gasps. And I’m right behind him on this one. What part of that story remotely fits the definition of _romantic_? Romantic is a word that sparks visions of gifts and flowers and moon lit dates. Two men roughing it at sea is the last thing I would think of.

But the fair Windy-san seems to be swooning. “Two brothers fall on hard times and runaway together, one supporting the other’s dream. It’s such a beautiful story,” she sighs. “Why didn’t you tell me it was something like this?” she says as she punches me in the shoulder roughly even though I’m sure the action was intended to be playful.

I blush. “I-I wouldn’t have wanted to dredge up such a _sorry_ tale in our first meeting, my dear Windy-san,” I say glancing at Usopp, trying to give him a look for concocting such an outrageous tale like that, but he now seems fixated on his sketch journal that he has in his lap. And-and there’s something in his expression that tugs at my thoughts.

“Oi, Usopp?” I ask.

He looks up at the sound of his name again, and after a moment, he smiles that nervous smile he gets when he’s lying about how brave he is while his knee are obviously still shaking.

“Sorry I came by when you’re working, Jin.” He does look as if he’s sincerely sorry, but it’s not for the reason he’s giving, I measure. I get this ache in my chest, which I contribute to the guilt. I’ve been feeling guilty for a lot of things lately pertaining to Usopp. The guy really deserves more... More what exactly, I’m not sure.

I shake my head. “Forget about it Usopp. I don’t mind. What do you want to eat? I’ll take your order.”

Usopp smiled a little more normally. “Can I get a big slice of chocolate cake?”

I sigh as I scribble that down, ‘cause I should have seen that coming. “Sure, I’ll be right back with it.” I turn to Windy-san as I leave. “If you’ll excuse me, Windy-san!” I say trying for my usual pleasant tone with her.

I look over my shoulder as Windy-san turns to Usopp and she and he start talking rather animatedly to each other about something that I’m too out of ear shot to hear and I wonder, not for the first time, what’s been up with Usopp lately.

 

“Wow! You’re really good! Is that supposed to be Jin?” the waitress—Windy?—asks after Sanji’s left and I’m freaking out ‘cause she’s too loud and I can’t tell if he’s heard her. I was just lucky that I had the chance to cover up the page before he saw it.

“Uh, yeah—his form’s really easy to sketch so when I don’t have anything to doodle, I just start drawing him,” I lie. Drawing Sanji’s actually the hardest thing to draw ‘cause it’s never just right and I haven’t even been able to observe him lately so I don’t think any of these are any good. I’ve been practicing drawing Sanji for a while—even before Sabaody—and I’ve probably got more sketches of him in my sketchbooks, here and back in my locker on the Sunny, then of anything else. It started out as just a fickle thought that if I’m thinking about him so much and I put it down on paper, maybe I’ll be able to think of something else. That hasn’t gotten me very far now, I guess, since I’m still thinking about him a lot and I’m becoming a freaking perfectionist because nothing is ever good enough.

Anyway, I seriously never imagined that he’d be working here of all places. This is the one place that I stopped at the day before the crew left on the Sunny. And Windy is the one that drew me the map. Watching Sanji gush over her makes my inadequacy all that more apparent, but that’s so normal by now that it barely pinches anymore. I feel so stupid for showing up here and getting in his way. I look behind me at the bags of stuff that I got today and I’m nervous too about how he’s going to react when he eventually sees all this. He was kind of angry about me buying _certain_ things earlier.

“So,” Windy’s leaning over the table with her hands planted far apart from each other. “Jin’s a cook and you’re an artist?” she asks.

“Oh, nah! I’m not an artist. It’s just a hobby. I’m actually a—” I try to come up with a better idea for an occupation, but Windy tends to talk fast, as I’d learned last time I spoke to her.

“Awe really? Oh, hey! Is Jin batting for the other team?”

I choke hard on my own saliva and Windy runs off and comes back quickly with a glass of water.

“Here! Sorry!” she shouts.

I chug the whole thing before I can breathe again. “W-why would you think that s—Jin’s gay?” I ask nervously, given that because I’ve got feelings for him, I probably am... or, uh, at least half gay.

“Oh,” she blushes and fiddles with the end of her ponytail. “I just thought he was when I saw him. He just dresses like a host and he talks kinda funny and he flirts with every girl like he’s over compensating for something—so I just thought.”

I start laughing—laughing really hard—even as Sanji comes back over with the cake, ‘cause I can’t really argue with her there. If I didn’t know him as well as I do—and I’d like to think that I know a lot about him in a not-stalkerish-kinda way—and know how much he really loves women and all, I might think he’s leaning towards that side of the spectrum too.

“What’s so funny?” he asks with a half-smile.

I shake my head. “Nothing-nothing.” I don’t have the heart to tell him what _Windy-san_ thinks of him. It would crush his ego... 


	5. Bracing Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Sanji

I don’t know how to explain what kind of day I’ve had, since it’s been so long since everything’s seemed to be going so right. Staying on this island and working everyday at that café has been an _interesting_ break from living on the Sunny. I’ve gotten a chance to see more than those eight familiar faces in any given day—not that I want to make it sound like I don’t kind of miss those guys, especially my beloved _Nami-swan_ and _Robin-chwan_ —but I’m not hounded almost hourly about meals—something I’ll never openly admit, but I am beginning to miss that idiot captain too—or fighting with that idiot marimo or being attacked by marines or other pirates or evil organizations and shit. It’s been like a long peaceful vacation if you think about it that way. And today has been like icing on the metaphorical cake. Everything is just going so smoothly that I can hardly feel my feet hitting the ground as I walk home with the groceries I’ve bought with my new _bonus_. I’m in such a good mood, I’m ready to just make a campfire outside and cook over that—lack of kitchen be damned.

I’ve been feeling motivated ever since I woke up this morning from _that_ dream again. It’s the third time since we’ve arrived on this island that I’ve had it and I can’t remember having it so frequently in such a short amount of time before. I’m almost thinking of it as a sign of something good to come. I don’t usually believe in dreams like this predicting your future—the one formally mentioned being one of the few exceptions—because normal dreams tend to run a little too crazy even for my daily life. For example the dream I had two nights ago where Luffy had eaten another Akuma no mi—and didn’t die or self-implode like I heard could happen—and had gotten the power to duplicate himself. The little shit decided to bombard me with an army of himself demanding lunch—surprisingly it wasn’t as nightmarish as it sounds because I was having far too much fun beating the shit out of Luffy as many times as I wanted. All the same this other dream has always lifted my mood, even though I’ve never seen the end of it.

The dream starts with a kitchen. A kitchen that I feel has been designed to my exact specifications from how high the countertops are to where and what’s in each cupboard and drawer. I’d be able to walk around this kitchen even blindfolded and never feel lost. There’s also every tool and ingredient that I could ever use—such as an industrial walk-in fridge and a spice rack as tall as Brook with some spices that I’ve only vaguely heard of before. I’ve got this whole kitchen to myself and the only task I have set before me it to create a meal for the person waiting just beyond the archway and out of view. I don’t know how I know this, but that person waiting out there is very possibly the one; it’s the lovely lady that I’ll find I can’t live without. I’m working so hard just to make the perfect entrée to present to her.

The menu’s always changing in the dream and is never the same thing twice, possibly because I don’t know what will suit her dreamy pallet just yet. All I can think about is walking out there with the cart to present it to her, imagining who it could be—sometimes I hope that it will be Nami-san—but no matter how hard or fast I work, I’m never able to finish preparing the meal before I’m forced back into awake land. Sometimes I feel that I’m so close and I’ll definitely finish it next time. But the idea that there is someone waiting for me like that has always made me feel like I need to crack down and get to work and a smile always finds its way to my face.

The whole experience was made even better since I wasn’t waking up on that hardwood floor of the shack. As surprised as I was to see Usopp at the café several days ago, I was even more surprised to see what he’d purchased the night after when we finished hearing from the lovely Robin-chan and reporting back to the Sunny. He pulled out a futon and unrolled it before he set to work hanging what looked like one the hammocks we had on the Going Merry. I watched him curiously. When I asked what he was doing, he said he bought the futon for _me_ and got the hammock for himself. I followed that up by asking why and he started bashfully into how he thought that I’d like the futon more, and then quickly added that he was used to the hammocks and he was kind of missing the sensation of swinging back and forth as he slept. I’d leaned over and felt how soft the futon was before I told him I really appreciated it. He told me to think nothing of it as he climbed into his hammock and rolled onto his side with his back to me before yawning exaggeratedly and saying good night. Ever since then, I’ve been waking up without that annoying kink in my neck that it takes me half the day to pop.

Beyond the futon, Usopp’s really been putting an effort into that place. He even installed a light so we can see without the torches and flashlights. At first I thought he was just bored or something, waiting around that communicator all day for someone to call in with an emergency, but when I saw all the half started projects that he’s got sitting around—his homemade weapons and inventions—it seems like he’s got more than enough to keep himself interested besides climbing on roofs and sanding floorboards. I’ve been thinking he must be lonely or something since on the Sunny it’s hard to get a moment of time alone and I’d always see him screwing around with Chopper and Luffy, or chatting it up with Brook, heads drawn together with Franky as the two conspire over their newest idea, or even hanging out with the Lovely Nami-san when she’s willing to talk to him. It’s hard for me to think that Usopp’s not at least a little lonesome. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately and that’s why I’m going to cook us dinner tonight. That and to celebrate that I’m finally working in a kitchen again.

There was a problem today that the Finch Café’s current cook couldn’t come in. Normally the owner herself can take care of small orders, but apparently there’s a customer that Windy-san always delivers too and this patron is kind of special. The lovely owner called me over and threw a kitchen apron and hairnet at me and told me to show her what I’ve got, a challenge that I’ve never backed down from. After I prepared the meal, the lovely Windy-san dashed in, packed the meal into a carrier and flew out of there like a breeze. The owner did like my quick work, but I think, after she tried the plate I’d also made for her, that she was impressed more by the quality. It was quite an exciting day at work to say the least, as she told me I was banned from working the floor ever again and I spent the day in my natural habitat. Windy-san had come back an hour or so later and said that the customer was very impressed with my cooking. So much so, they wanted me to make the same thing tomorrow. Yes, a very excellent day all around.

I find myself standing in front of the door that I knocked down a couple of weeks ago. It’s kind of weird, but it almost feels like I’m coming home to this place. I figure it’s because that’s what it’s kind of become, especially since there’s someone here waiting for me. I hope that Usopp’s willing to wait a bit longer than usual since I plan on making dinner tonight. I open the door.

“I’m home—”

“Ahhh!” Usopp yelps. “Dammit! No, no! Shut the door!”

I turn around and shut the door behind me, confused why he’s shouting.

“No,” he says, throwing his arms up to hid whatever’s behind him. “I meant I wanted the door shut with you on the other side of it!”

“Fine, then I’ll leave!” I say turning back to the door. I don’t know what’s got him so riled up, but his behavior’s pissing me off.

“Ah, No! Don’t leave. Ah, um, just, uh...” I look back at him as he casts a look over his shoulder with an anxious expression on his face, which piques my curiosity. _What’s back there?_ I remember vaguely that there’s been some kind of tarp or cover against the back wall of this place and I just thought it was because there was a big hole back there that he was patching up.

“Uh shit, I only need maybe a few more minutes. Can-can you, uh, just wait out there and I’ll come get you when it’s—when I’m ready?” He says looking back at me like he’s begging.

 _Shit_ , “Fine. I’ll wait. But hurry the Hell up. I got stuff I need to do too.”

I leave and close the door behind me. _What the Hell is wrong with me!?_ Uh, I mean _him_. Yeah, him. What the Hell was he giving me that face for? He’s been acting weird lately—though now that I think about he’s always been kind of weird and jumpy around me, like he’s scared I’m going to kick him or something—but it’s like it’s only been getting worse. I don’t know whether I should be offended that he thinks he can’t trust me, or to tell him he’s being an idiot ‘cause he should... trust me, that is. And that look on his face. That pleading, innocent look, it made my stomach flip-flop. No, wait, that’s not what I meant.

My relationship with Usopp has always been a little different then with the other guys on the ship and... I think it’s because he’s one of the few people I can talk to. Between him and the other members of the crew—not including the ladies—I’m glad that he’s the one I got stuck here with. I always thought he and I got along pretty well. Especially since he and I made this deal where he draws me his beautiful images of my Nami-swan and Robin-chwan and I feed him a bit better than the rest of those slobs.

He’s really got talent. He can draw pretty well. I also heard that he originally painted the Jolly Roger for the crew so I guess he can paint too. He’s the one that was doing most of the repairs on the Going Merry and somehow managed to keep her afloat as long as he did despite all the hard loving she got. That and look what he’s done to this place. Not to mention some of the stuff he’s invented in the past to make up for his short comings. He’s always got something handy for most situations—even if sometimes he mutilated my cooking tools to make his shit. And it seems that after those two years that everyone was separated, he came back with more self-confidence. So why’s he acting so weird around me? What did I do?

“Uh, Sanji?” he says from where he’s standing in the doorway. He’s got this timid smile on his face and I want to tell him to stop being so nervous ‘cause it’s making me nervous. “You can come in now.”

“Good,” I say scooping up the bags into my arms.

“What are those?” he asks.

“Groceries. I’m going to make dinner tonight.”

“Oh...” Usopp looks confused and glances back at the back wall, that’s got that tarp up again. “W-where are you going to make it?” he asks looking back at me.

I sigh. “I was thinking of roughing it and making a campfire outside to cook over.”

“Oh!” Usopp smiled. “Well hold off on that a bit and let me show you something first,” he starts moving towards the back of the shack. “I just finished it and I think you’re really going to like it.”

“Yeah, really?” I smirk. He’s practically got a skip in his step. “What it is?”

“You got to close your eyes first,” he says.

“Don’t be an idiot. Just show it to me already.”

“Okay, okay,” he says even as he’s laughing. “Here ya go!”

He reaches up and pulls down the tarp and for a moment I don’t know what I’m looking at. I mean, I know what I’m looking at, I just don’t know what it’s doing in a place like this. There’s a polished metal stove in the left corner, a huge sink next to it, and a counter space that lines the rest of the wall. There, a good couple feet above the counter, is a small cast-iron door that I can only assume is the opening to an oven _in the wall_. Under the counter’s another opening, that’s got to be where you put the fire wood in. There’s even a small icebox under the right corner of counter where it meets the other wall. There’s metal cups bolted to the wall holding rubber spatulas, whisks, wooden spoons, and eating utensils and a block of knives on the countertop next to a cutting board. There’s also hooks that have a cooking skillet and pots hanging from them. I’m so dazed I nearly lose my hold on the bags in my arms. Usopp’s standing next to it smiling at me with that confident smile he wears when he’s telling his ‘Captain Usopp’ stories.

“You-you did this?” I ask.

“Uh, yeah. Most of it,” he said scratching the back of his head bashfully. “The sink, stove, and the oven were here the whole time, but they were broken so I fixed ‘em, and then I installed the counter and all the hooks and stuff. The fridge was somethin’ I bought as an afterthought and I just finished splicing the cords and hooking it up to the generator...” He seems really proud of himself as he stands there shuffling his feet and I don’t know what to say to him. I think I’ve been knocked speechless again.

“You could break it in tonight, since you got the stuff.” He looks at me and there’s a slight look of apprehension tugging at the corner of his smile. “You like it, right?”

“You don’t need to ask that, you idiot,” I smile at him. “I love it. I still can’t believe you did all this. It’s amazing!”

His confident smile’s back and he’s returned to his normal self for the first time I’ve seen in forever. “Well of course it is. I, the great and astounding Captain Usopp made it. Nothing but the best for the world’s greatest chef,” he says throwing me a smile before his cheeks turn red at his own words. “I-I thought that you’d be itchin’ to cook something since you haven’t been able to lately.”

It’s still kind of fuzzy in my head. He made this for _me_. I can’t think of a time I’ve gotten a more amazing gift. There’s even hand painted images on the stone wall that everything’s braced against. The fact that he did all this in two and a half weeks is just as astonishing.

I walk up to the countertop and put my bags down so I can look it over. Usopp seems content to stand back and watch as I take everything in, inspecting his handiwork. The counter he’s installed is even sealed to the stone wall behind it so nothing will fall through. I run my hands over the knives. They’re pretty nice, but so’s the pots and pans on the walls. And the fridge. Where did he get the money for all this? I turn on him to ask, but he’s already one step ahead of me, already answering my unvoiced question.

“I had some money set aside for this trip, but when the plan changed and we started stayin’ here, and you were getting meals for free, I found myself with a lot of loose change. If something cost more than I had, I traded manual labor to cover the rest. I tried to get the stuff that I thought you’d really use first,” and I’m flashing back to that argument we had that first morning. He was really listening.

“Oh,” he says like he just remembered something else. “I also made something else out back. But I can show that to ya later if you want to start this first.”

I’m looking at him like I haven’t seen him in a long time and after a moment he starts fidgeting. “Sanji?” he asks nervously.

“Ah, sorry. I-I’m just really impressed. This is the most anyone’s ever done for me. I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t really have to say anything. Just make me a really awesome dinner and we’ll call it even,” he says excitedly, his face red.

“Dinner’s coming right up,” I say, but I don’t think just dinner’s going to be enough. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get that idiot to understand what this means to me. I mean, the counter’s the right height and everything. This may not be my dream kitchen, but it’s one of a kind and that idiot worked on it just for me. I still can’t wrap my head around it.       

~~.~~

I’m kind of surprised when my conscious mind tells me that I’m in the dream again. But I had this dream only the other night? Two nights in a row? That has to be a sign. I’m in my perfect kitchen as always, but I recognize that my dream kitchen’s made some slight modifications like the new pattern that’s been hand painted onto the walls and the cupboard doors. I smirk because the painted images fit in nicely with the rest of the dreamt up room. I look down at what I’m cooking and see that it’s some kind of fish today—pike by the looks of it. My body moves over to the other part of the entrée that I’m cooking in another pan and I stir the vegetables as it simmers in the butter. I look over to the archway and try to lean my head to see if I can catch a glimpse of her, but as usual, I’m at the wrong angle to see much of anything. I sigh as I return to preparing the meal in front of me.

I try to imagine her as my hands work; performing tasks that they are well acquainted with so I don’t have to watch what I’m doing as closely and can let my mind wander. The funny thing is, my mind can’t conjure up any images of beautiful women or gorgeous mademoiselles. Since I can’t fantasize about her, I’m left to focus on the food before me, which to my surprise is almost complete. I move over to the sink and rinse my hands before grabbing a plate from the cupboard two doors over and bring it back. I go about placing the food on the plate taking my time to make sure the food not only tastes exquisite, but looks marvelous as well. I dribble a light sauce over the seasoned piece of fish and slice open one of the sautéed Brussels sprouts on the plate and lay the two halves so they overlap in the shape of a heart.

As I lift my hands away from my masterpiece, I’m confused because—if I haven’t missed anything—I’m done. I’m really done! I’ve never finished a dish before the dream ended. _Wait!_ That means I can—

I look over at the archway leading to the dining room and my hearts begins to hammer in my chest. I-I finally get to see her?

 _Well, hurry up!_ I warn myself, _before you wake up!_

I put the plate on the cart that’s waiting next to my work space and start out to the dining room. I know somewhere in my mind that this is only a dream, but I can’t help my frazzled nerves. I’m so excited, yet now that I’m here, I’m nervous. What am I going to do if the dream doesn’t end the way I wanted it to?

I shake my head. It’s just a dream, so there’s no point in getting scared now. _Come on._

I turn the corner and for a moment my thoughts come to a complete stop. I know what I’m looking at this time around. I’ve seen something like it a week ago. Sitting there in casual clothes—that green shirt with a yellow star in the middle of the chest and even though I can’t see them from under the starch white table cloth, I knows he’s wearing those tan khaki shorts—with eyes casted down as hand and writing utensil move rapidly over his page in his sketch journal that I’ve seen a number of times, I’m kind of shocked that there aren’t blaring alarms going off in my head. There’s quite a few things that are unmistakable about him—like the dark mess of black curls that I’ve noticed have started to look less and less unruly lately, that armband on his forearm that he wears religiously and I’m starting to find myself curious why, that hat and the headphones around his neck, and of all, the nose sticking out from under the brim. I’m just confused why... Why is he here, why he’s sitting there drawing, and why am I not freaking out about this as much as I should be ‘cause isn’t this _the dream_ , the one that I’ve always thought was supposed to be about...

“Usopp?” He looks up instinctively at the sound of his name and when he sees me his initial response isn’t to jump in his chair or to look at me like he’s confused. He smiles in a way that makes my heart stutter for a moment and I lay my hand over my chest as if trying to calm it. _No need to act this way, it’s just Usopp._

“Hey Sanji! What took you so long? I was waiting for you.”

“Uh, I’m sorry,” I apologize almost mechanically. “I didn’t think it would take so long,” which sounds eerily similar to what I told the real Usopp just this evening when I brought his dinner. _Shit_ , I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.

“Nah, that’s okay. I’m just glad you’re here. I wanted to show ya somethin’,” he says as I walk over to him pushing the cart. I’m still toiling over all this in my head. Why is Usopp i-in that chair? I’ve always thought that that special someone was supposed to be waiting for me here, a beautiful lady with long luscious hair, dreamy curves, and tan bouncy breasts. This just has to be because I’ve been feeling bad about Usopp lately. That’s why this is happening, because I can’t—

“Hey? Why’d you bring only one plate?” he asks, and I glance down at the one dish that I’ve never been able to finish before, completely done and ready to be served.

“B-because this... is for you.” My throat feels extremely dry.

“Why,” he asks and I freeze for a moment, wondering what direction this is going to take and then Usopp goes on to say. “It’s not right if I’m eating all alone.”

I don’t know what to say. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I feel just as speechless as I did earlier when Usopp unveiled the kitchen he made me.

But Usopp smiles, “Eh, why don’t we share it? Come on, sit down. I still want to show this to you.”

I take the plate off the cart and set it down on the table, then push the cart away. I pull back a chair and nervously take the seat next to him. I don’t know what to do anymore, because I’m still freaking out somewhat about what’s going on and at the same time Usopp’s smiling at me like I’m being silly and grabs his sketchbook to hand me.

“I was thinking that you liked the kitchenette I fixed so much, maybe we could remodel the kitchen on the Sunny too.” He starts cutting into the fish on the plate—Pike, _his_ favorite, _Shit!_ “I don’t think Franky would mind all that much. It would just be awkward feeding the rest of the crew while we’re working on it, but maybe we can do only one part of the kitchen at a time. What do ya think?”

I’m looking down at the sketchbook and I kind of feel like my hands are shaking. It’s weird. I’ve seen the image sketched on the paper over a dozen times, but I’ve never seen it quite like this. I look back up at the archway leading back to my dream kitchen and then at Usopp, who looks like he really likes his food and I’m wondering how he could have possibly known how my dream kitchen would look.

“Sanji,” he says happily. “You really out did yourself this time. This is amazing.” Then he spears another piece of fish with the fork and holds it out to me like he wants me to bite it off the end. “Here, you should have some too.”

~~.~~

I sit up with a start and realize that I’m back in the shack. The dream’s over and it’s ended so abruptly that I’m not sure what’s going on. I look up and over at Usopp’s hammock where he’s sleeping and I can hear his snoring. I want to stand up, walk over there, wake him up and...and do what exactly? I run my fingers through my hair and breathe in deeply. _What is wrong with me!?_


	6. Explosive Turret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Usopp  
> > Sanji  
> > Usopp

I’m tinkering with something when I get a reaction from the communicator. It’s the middle of the day and Sanji’s still at work, so I wonder what’s up. I pull a chair over to the desk—I finally got around to getting one not too long ago so the communicator isn’t just sitting on the floor—and turn the screen to the right channel. Franky’s face appears on the screen and I wonder what’s up.

˹Hey Long-nose-bro, how are ya doin’?˼

“Fine, but what’s up over there? You usually don’t call unless—”

˹It’s Nami, Long-nose-bro. She’s driving me crazy!˼

“Ah,” I nod. The crew’s succeeded in getting the treasure a couple of days ago, but the days leading up to it, from what I’ve heard from everyone else, were pretty rough. The weather’s been fine and the sea’s been giving them no trouble. It’s our own nakama that are having problems with each other.

˹It’s Mugiwara-bro too˼ Franky says. ˹Without you around he and Tanuki-bro haven’t been the same. Mugiwara’s been driving everyone crazy and without Eyebrow-bro to shut him up, he’s really driving that woman over the edge. Even Haramaki-bro’s been tense lately ‘cause he’s not gotten a chance to spare with the cook. And the whole time me and Brook have been trying to keep everyone from killin’ each other. There were these poor guys on the island that were trying to defend the treasure—turns out they’re the ones that originally stole it from some other poor-saps—and everyone was so stressed out that they didn’t bother holding back. Dude, I can’t wait till we get you guys back. The crew’s not super without ya.˼

It’s nice to be missed... I guess. I feel more like they’re desperate to have us back so that we can babysit our captain, but I’ve been missing everybody too, even though I’ve been getting the chance to talk to everybody—even Zoro surprisingly enough—on the communicator at one point or another; everyone’s complaining about something or someone. I feel so wanted that it actually makes me eager to see them all again. I’ve told Sanji about everybody calling in to talk to me, and though he wasn’t as sympathetic to anyone’s plight aside from Nami’s, he shared the sentiment.

˹Franky! Are you down there?˼ The big guy flinches at the sound of our navigator’s voice and I don’t blame him. She sounds like she does only during that time of the month.

I hear heels clicking and Franky looks over to the other side of the room where I’m guessing Nami’s standing and he defends himself again, saying he’s got a right to be down here, but Nami’s not going to take that right now and tells him to scram ‘cause it’s her turn to talk to me. Franky high-tails it out of there and I’m worried what Nami has to say to me.

She falls back into the chair with a moan and swivels it around to face the screen and the camera. She fixes the camera angle again and brings the mic closer to her. She looks exhausted, large dark circles under her eyes. It’s been hardest on her, I guess, since she’s the only one—as Luffy’s said—that Sanji told the combination to the fridge to, so Luffy’s been on her like white on rice beggin’ her for food every chance he gets. Meanwhile, she’s having to do everything herself because Sanji’s not waiting on her hand and foot and she doesn’t even have anyone to talk to because Robin and I—the people she normally goes to to blow off steam—aren’t there to hear her and the only time she’s got is whenever she can steal the communicator from someone else. Not that I don’t see why she doesn’t just use it to call me herself instead of stealing it from other people. Everyone else has just had Franky set it up for them.

I’m not all that empathetic, ‘cause this is the Nami that storms around acting more like a captain half time than Luffy and bossing everyone around and charges friends money and takes advantage of Sanji ‘cause he gets stupid around her, and she’s been really getting involved in my business besides a lack of invitation. But, at the same time, she is my friend. And yesterday I heard from Chopper about the huge fight that happened onboard the Sunny when Luffy was screwing around and pushed Zoro over board _again_ and when he got back on deck he was too pissed to see straight and he and Luffy started going at it because Luffy insisted that it was Zoro’s fault for getting in his way. They started tearing up the lawn deck and Nami started yelling, but the two of them weren’t listening. It took both Franky’s and Chopper’s Heavy Point’s combined strength to disarm Zoro and then their combined weights, ‘cause they had to pin the guys to the deck by sitting on them. I’m actually scared the ship might not be in one piece by the time they get back here.

But Nami doesn’t start into the horror stories I’ve been hearing. She goes straight into what she wants to know.

˹Has there been any progress between the two of you?˼

I sigh, ‘cause how does she still have the energy to prod at me. “Not that it’s any of your business,” I mutter this first part where the mic won’t be able to pick up the sound of my voice. “But No, there’s nothing to report.”

˹Really?˼ Nami seems almost upset by this. ˹I thought after the kitchen-gift thing went so well that maybe you were going to make a move.˼

I suppress a groan and rub my fingers agitatedly through my hair. I didn’t tell Nami about the kitchenette until after I’d already given it to Sanji and she heard about it with everyone else when Sanji was telling them. And there has been some progress, but it’s not something that Nami would consider progress since the two of us have just been talking more, especially while Sanji’s cooking and sometimes I even help, ‘cause I get to be closer to him for a bit on that narrow counter space. They’re little things that make _me_ happy.

But also, there’s, um, something else. Not that this is something possibly to be worried about, but I’ve noticed that Sanji is a little tense around me and sometimes even jumpy. But he tells me nothing’s wrong and then goes right back to talking to me and I don’t know what to think of it. Maybe he’s on to me? But if he’s on to me and doesn’t seem completely disgusted with it, maybe... Argh, I don’t even know if that’s the reason behind why he’s been a little weird. It could be some stress about work.

As I’ve sat here sweating over this, apparently it’s shown all over my face, ‘cause Nami responds with, ˹That bad, eh?˼

“What?!” I ask, confused about what she’s getting at.

˹I’m sorry if my meddling has been pressuring you, Usopp. I just...˼ she looks away from the camera and sighs and I’m just shocked that she’s apologizing and it actually sounds kind of honest. And this is Nami we’re talking about. Did the stress on their end actually break her? ˹I... I just think that you should suck it up and tell him! Get over your stupid incompetence and tell the idiot that you love him before your little reprieve is over. Because the moment you guys step foot back on this ship there’s not going to be any time for you to cozy up to him. I’m going to run you guys ragged, making you work off what you owe me for this little _vacation_ of yours, and you and Sanji are going to know the Hell I’ve been through for the past few weeks in your snuggly little absence!!˼

She sounds mad. Does she sound mad? How do those two things relate? Uh... maybe I should get this whole confession thing over with... ‘cause I might not have a chance to tell him ever again if I’m to take Nami’s threats to heart.                        

 

I don’t know whether I’ve been possessed, or brainwashed, or this is just some kind of strange sailor madness that I’ve yet to hear of, but it’s become pretty clear that my feelings for that shitty long-nose have been changing ever since we arrived on this godforsaken island. After that dream, I’ve been thinking about him more in just one day than any other woman, even my dear sweet _Nami-swan_. And if it’s not that, then I’m seeking his company at every available moment. This wouldn’t be so strange if I didn’t seriously race back to that shack every night, just knowing that when I open that door and say “I’m back”, he’ll look up from whatever he’s doing and smile at me so brightly it’s like he’s brought the sun into the room. You see? The man’s ‘causing me to sprout poetic verses about him. I think I’m going crazy...

And-and I think I’m in love with him...

I don’t know why this is happening. It’s not in my nature to look at men as anything other than possible competition for my mademoiselles’ affections; stupid wastes of oxygen and necessary resources. My purpose in life has always been to love and admire the fairer sex. And this is Usopp. He’s unintentionally fucked up my whole reality.

He’s clumsy, and socially awkward, and a coward that’s afraid of his own shadow. And I’ve known him a long time! How is this happening now? It can’t be because it’s just the two of us stuffed into tight quarters. It’s just as cramped as it is on the Sunny and even here there are lovely ladies everywhere I look, so it’s not like I’m desperate or anything. I’ve even theorized that it’s might be because he gave me that amazing little kitchen—I did have that dream the following evening—but then that wouldn’t explain why the days leading up to that I found my thoughts infested with him.

I run my hands over my face, wishing that I could have a cigarette right now, but I’m at work. I’ve been so distracted with this, I’m glad it hasn’t been affecting my performance. I’ve noticed that my feelings for Usopp have a different effect on me than any other reaction I’ve had in the presence of other women. It’s not like how I am with say Robin-chan or Nami-san or every other gorgeous being I see. The sight of such beauties makes my heart flutter and my head spin, but with Usopp it’s more like my pulse is pumping blood from my heart so powerfully that it makes my whole body quiver with the tempo of my heartbeat—making my hands unsteady and my legs shaky—and my mind becomes so crystal-clear that I can see everything around me and still process normal thought, and still I can’t focus on anything besides him. The worst part is that these violent side-effects to being around him only started after I admitted to myself that he might just be the one.  

And-and there’s even something worse that I’ve started to notice... Admitting this to myself is the hardest thing I’ve ever endured—even worse than that Hellish island full of those disturbing okama... I’m actually thinking of that long-nose with impure intentions in mind. I-I’ve caught myself looking at him in a way that I’ve always thought a man should never look at another. I was checking out _his ass_ just yesterday while he was standing next to me peeling carrots and talking to me. When he looks up at me, innocently unaware of what I was doing, wearing that smile that he always seems to be displaying recently—such a smile that makes me feel like I’ve lost my balance—and I realized what I was doing, I felt like my airway tied itself in a knot and I couldn’t breathe. The erotic images that I occasionally come up with when I’m not paying attention to anything in particular are the very things that I’ve been trying to protect lovely ears of maidens from hearing. Oh god, I’ve become a pervert!!

“Jin, it’s our lunch break!” Windy-san called from the kitchen door.

I freeze. I’ve been thinking about such things all morning as I’ve gone about work. I’m so happy to be cooking again, but because I’m so well trained in the task, my mind’s free to wander and there’s little I can do to control myself and stop from thinking of that idiot, inappropriate thoughts or not.

I turn my head towards the swinging doors and cast the lovely Windy-san a smile. “I’ll be there shortly, my dear Windy-san. Just let me finish this.”

She smiles as she leaves, the door swinging closed behind her. Looking down at the nearly completed meal in front of me—which reminds me of that dream again—I tell myself to keep it together. I can’t let anyone know of this current development. Not the ladies, not the crew, and especially not that shitty idiot. I feel extremely guilty looking at him that way. He thinks of us as friends, which is what we should be, _what we are_. He’s good to me because we’re friends and this little vacation has kind of only made me realize that he’s an even better person then I thought before. I’ve got no right to come on to him like my mind keeps playing over and over for me like a broken record. Besides, this is _Usopp_ we’re talking about. He’s an idiot and a coward. If I told him I’ve realized I’m in love him, he would probably runaway or avoid me, possibly never be capable of acting normal around me ever again. I don’t want him to become awkward in my presence, especially after we seem to have gotten closer recently. I don’t know how I’d handle that kind of rejection anyway. It’s best to let sleeping dogs lie.

I walk into the employee’s break room to find that the other two waiters, Ann-chan and that Negi guy, are gone. It’s simply the lovely Windy-san present. She looks up at me expectantly and I place the finished dish on the small table in front of her, feeling uneasy that while making it for her, I was thinking solely of that long-nose. She seems blissfully unaware of the deceit as she starts digging in with table manners that are only slightly more acceptable than our captain’s; though since it is Windy-san, it seems far more attractive. But I can’t even get any pleasure out of watching her enjoy my food I especially prepared of her, because seeing her eating like this only reminds me of Usopp and I wonder what he’s eating for lunch. God, I hope it’s not one of those shitty protein bars again.

“Jin?”

I respond more to the sound of her voice then the alias as I turn in my seat to face her. In fact it takes me a second more to realize the connection.

“Oh, uh, yes?” I say, rattling off rather stupidly.

“You okay, right?” she asks cocking a lovely eyebrow at me.

“Why yes. I’m fine, my lovely Windy-san. Any particular reason why you ask?”

“Uh,” she blushes and it’s such a cute sight as color rushes up to her speckled cheeks. Her blush, I sigh, makes me think of Usopp—and then I tell my thoughts to stop right there, because I’m talking to _Windy-san_ right now. “It’s nothing. You just seem a bit different lately.”

 _I probably seem lost in thought_ , I think to myself.

“Um, Jin, can I ask you something?”

“Why of course, my dear. I would love to answer anything I can for you,” I say leaning forward on the table and smiling at her reassuringly.

The tint of her red deepens as she speaks. “Well it’s kind of personal. Are you sure?”

“That hardly matters, my sweet,” I encourage her. “I could never shoot down a lady’s query.”

“Okay then,” she says looking down at her half polished off lunch. “Are you, um, uh, how to put it, a ‘confirmed bachelor’?”

I look at her confused. I’m not sure what that’s supposed to mean. “I’m not seeing anyone right now, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Uh, no, not exactly. I mean, what I really wanted to ask was if you’re, uh, you know—” she pauses as she gives the room a quick sweep, “—gay?” Her face flushes still as she looks away from me.

But her’s is not nearly as red as mine. Has this gorgeous, yet perceptive young woman caught onto the fact that I’ve been having immoral thoughts about and pertaining to one of my fellow Nakama? But how? It’s only been a few days since I figured it out myself.

Panic causes my heart to accelerate. I’m ready to fear the worst, but I-I’m suddenly not really upset about whether she may or may not have figured it out.

 _Am I actually okay with someone realizing I like another man?_ Even after what I told myself only a few minutes ago, I’m kind of surprised that I’m not jumping to defend myself. It’s weird, but I’m not as scared of her knowing as I thought I would be. Strange, I’m not ashamed that I like that idiot.

 _That’s right, why should I be?_ I ask myself. He’s not a bad guy at all. A little gutless, but he’s proven time and again that it’s not going to stop him from trying. He’s extremely loyal to his friends and everyone on the crew. He’s also exceedingly talented. He has more creative instinct and abilities than anyone I’ve ever met, even if he lacks assurance. And besides that, he’s not even that hard on eyes. Though I’ve only been looking at him that way recently, I’ve found that he’s actually rather attractive. It’s weird, I know, for me to be thinking of anyone that’s not a woman as attractive, but it’s true. The way he blushes and fumbles with things is endearing. I’ve thought that even long before we arrived at this island. He’s also handsome, I guess, when he, uh, actually bothers to, uh, clean up and...Ah, Hell. I’d even say I like the way he looks when he’s all covered in grease and oil and saunters into the galley to eat, even as I’d yell at him to get his greasy ass out of my kitchen.

“ _. . . .”_

 _Wait!_ I think as panic flared up again. _I-I’ve been thinking he’s attractive for that long? When-when did I really start to like him?!_ Looking back on memories of the past with him, I finally recognize certain impulses and I’m translating anonymous feelings I’ve once had.

“I’m sorry, Jin.” My attention’s hastily brought back to Windy-san. “I’m a little pushy. That was rude, wasn’t it? I just had to know. It was driving me crazy,” she admits bashfully.

 I’m not sure what to say for myself. This is a first for me. I-I’ve never been accused of being gay and..and the accusations bared truth; though the fact that I’m in love with Usopp is the only exception to my otherwise _straight_ track record.

The innocent Windy-san speaks again before I can make any leeway with my thoughts. “I tried asking your brother if you were once...”

 _My brother?_ Oh, that’s right Usopp said he was my brother when he came here that once... Wait! She asked Usopp if I was gay?! And that would mean that—

“He started laughing after I mentioned it, and I never got an answer from him, so I just—”

She’d asked Usopp... What’s that supposed to mean? I’m no longer listening to Windy-san, I don’t have the patience for it. I just spend some time assuring her that she hasn’t offended me, that I’m fine. I tell her I need to get back to work and make my way back to the kitchen where I can think clearly.

I realize that I can’t tell Usopp how I feel. That would be like driving the sharpened edge of a kitchen knife through our current relationship. I like Usopp... maybe for a while now, but I need to find a way to work around these feelings so I can still be near him. The fact that I’m so uncomfortable with the topic of my sexuality being discussed with the one person that’s an exception to the norm, is proof of how scared I am of facing the truth.

 

I just finish up checking in with Robin as Sanji gets back. I’m kind of glad that she called in early, ‘cause I actually got to get a full report from her this time before she had to cut out and leave. She told me that she’s found out what professor Bacari was working on; some strange new use for sea prism stone as a weapon. She’s trying to delay the progress of such a thing by writing up fake data and mixing it in with the real stuff so that the people working on the project won’t be able to get very far with inaccurate test results. Besides her work to sabotage the gate, we’re lucky that she stole Bacari’s identity or we would have never known about this stuff. Oh, and she also told me that the captain at the base complimented the cover I designed to disguise her communicator watch, saying something about how very cute it was. Ha! Captain Usopp, the great warrior of the sea, has once again created a brilliant device which is not only functional, but stylish as well. Let that be a lesson to anyone that tells me I don’t have any style. I got plenty of style...

Ah, oh, but back to Sanji getting home. I was still thinking about what Nami’d said. Threats and evil plots to put me in my grave early aside, she’s right about things going well enough. Sanji and I have gotten really close since and I feel like I’ve been wearing rose-tinted goggles the last few days. If things are going so well, I’ve been thinking maybe I could confess to him. If-if I approach it coolly, maybe I can brush it off if things turn sour. I’ve been thinking cocky ideas like this all day, but seeing him come home deflates my ego instantly. I don’t think I could ever have the courage to tell him how I feel.

Sanji smiles at me and walks straight over to his kitchen, which makes me smile more, ‘cause _I made it_. Us living like this is almost like a spoof of our real lives. I mean Sanji’s goes off and works to bring home the bacon and then he cooks it too, while I fix up this place and make it really feel like our place. It is our place, like a little haven just for us, a paradise where I practically have Sanji all to myself, I don’t have to worry about him swooning or noodling over anyone and I don’t have to feel nervous or jealous or inadequate. And I made it. You can’t blame me for thinking rose-tinted, right? Nah, I’m going to miss this when we head back to the Sunny...especially if Nami’s going to carry through with her promise. I shiver at the thought.

“Oi, Usopp?”

I look over at him. The shack’s not big. There’s not a lot of furniture aside from the kitchenette and the desk I got for the communicator. I’ve been using Sanji’s futon kind like soft support to lean on. It’s real nice ‘cause now every time I’m lean on it, I can kind of smell him on me. I know that’s probably weird, using his stuff like that, but I’ve learned that I got to take what I can.    

“Yeah, Sanji?” I ask smiling at him, and trying to ignore the heat that rises inside me as I catch a whiff of him again from the floor bed. He’s got his back to me and he’s frying something that smells almost just as heavenly, and I feel like being a smug asshole and telling Luffy about it next time I get to talk to him—even though I know I won’t. He’d beat me up the moment he saw me again in real life. Sanji rolls his shoulders and I get the feeling that he’s tense about something again. “Uh, what’s wrong?”

“I wanted to ask you a favor,” he says throwing me a smile over his shoulder, but it doesn’t look quite right.

“Uh, sure, depends what it is,” I say.

“I was thinking that since this place looks so nice and all, maybe I could bring... bring Windy-san over to see it.”

I feel like my lungs have gone ridged and it takes a lot of effort to breathe in and out. _W-w-what d-did he sa-say?_ Did I hear him right? He-he wants to bring a girl-a woman here? _Why?_ Who’m I kidding? I know why, he’s Sanji. That’s just who Sanji is. But..but he wants to bring a girl here? Into this place that I...I put so much effort into? T-to what? C-cook for h-her with the stuff I made him?

I keep telling the irrational part of my mind that it’s completely reasonable what he wants to do and it’s not like I have any claim over him. He’s free to do what he pleases. I should be glad he’s at least asking. But- _BUT_ this is my home too. This is my haven that I made. I made it for the two of us, yeah, but I always thought it was just ours. I sound like a kid that feels betrayed because his best friends brought an outsider to their secret base. But this was like our secret base... I-I-...

“You can’t.” My mouth starts moving all on its own and, even though my voice sounds even and pretty angry, I’m scared of what’s going to roll out of it next, ‘cause I-I’m really upset, but I don’t want to say anything I’ll regret. “You can’t just bring people here. We...we’re undercover. You start bringing people around and the two of us’ll get discovered.” It sounds completely plausible, what’s coming out of my mouth, like it’s genuine concern even though it’s not _my_ reason. I stand up, ‘cause I’m too angry and upset to stay sitting, but the moment I’m to my feet I can feel my legs shaking under me. “You can’t bring that woman here especially. She’s already close to you at your work and if she sees us together again she might start to recognize us.”

Sanji’s turned around to face me and he seems a little taken aback by my freak out and I realize I’ve probably just botched all that hard work at getting him to like me more, but this isn’t fucking fair.

“Well, I was kind of hoping you would leave when she came over anyway... You know, give me some time alone.”

 _What. The. Hell!_ He wants me to leave him alone with her, in the place I made for us, so he can—what?—s-sex her up? I didn’t peg Sanji as the type to just sleep with a girl, you know—just swoon over them—but I guess he’s tired of just looking at sketches of women and wants something m-more. I feel my legs shaking. no...No. NO!

“No! You can’t bring someone here like that. I-I’ve got the communicator here. What if someone calls in with an emergency? What if she realizes everything and it’s all jeopardized... You may be willing to put Robin in danger, but I’m not!”

“Don’t you think for a second that I would ever do something that would allow harm to come to Robin-chan, you shitty Bastard,” Sanji yells, and I flinch. I know I shouldn’t have pulled the Robin card, but I’d rather he be mad at me than have some stupid girl in my paradise. Even though, as I realize, I’ve already ruined it by fighting with him.

Sanji still looks angry and his shoulders are shaking. He probably wants to beat me up and I don’t blame him. But I-I... I don’t want the person I love to be so close with someone else in the same place that he’s with me. I-I don’t want him to be closer to someone else here than he’s with me.

My whole frame is shaking and I don’t know if it’s, ‘cause I’m scared or if I’m angry, or if it’s from the aftershock from the adrenaline rush. I look up at Sanji and my chest hurts. It hurts a lot more than it ever has, even back when I was in Syrup village and everyone didn’t believe me about that stupid butler. I’m feeling just as alone and abandoned, but it’s kind of worse than that even. _Dammit, Nami_ , I feel a large lump forming in my throat and my eyes are goin’ to start leaking whether I want them to or not. _I told you it would hurt a whole lot fucking more if I admitted I loved him_.

I need to get out of here, ‘cause I don’t want to start crying in front of Sanji and I don’t want to debunk everything I just said, ‘cause it’s all true, but the moment I make it about me, I’m screwed. I’ve flown out the door before Sanji can stop me, even though he calls after me. I don’t wanna. I don’t know for sure what he wants from me now, but I’m one of the fastest runners on the ship so I doubt he could catch me. I just keep running. 


	7. Wall of Separation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> >Sanji  
> >Usopp  
> >Sanji

I can feel a hollow pit in my stomach, like there’s a dull ache there even though right below it, there’s a swirl of growing heat. My chest feels heavy and my breath is hot, coming out is short moist puffs. My conscious mind is trying to locate where I am, but it’s fighting with the distraction that won’t relent. All I can focus on is the fierce heat engulfing me; the small, occasional, but pleasant nip, as well as the long pulls and needy stroking along the underside. I feel so good it takes my eyes more than a moment to focus. One of my hands is braced against the wall to my back, trying to find leverage as my legs start to give under me. My other hand is woven into unbelievably soft, buoyant curls. I realize it’s a dream. It’s a dream even as I look down and _so_ want it to be real. It feels real and the view I’m getting is so amazing, looking down at Usopp and watching his mouth work me, the incredible contrast against our skins and the look on his face. But still, there’s one sensation that my mind can’t recreate since it doesn’t have anything to base it on. I can’t feel the small prodding of Usopp’s nose as it nudges my lower stomach even as I watch it do so. How funny that I can notice something so small when I’m so close. Oh god, I’m so close—

~~.~~

I wake up with a jolt, still lying flat on my back. My heart’s beating too fast, like I’ve been running all night and I’m covered in such a thick layer of sweat that my t-shirt is smeared to my chest. My blanket’s discarded, bunched up and tangled around my feet. _This summer island’s too damn hot for shitty blankets anyway._ The dream I’ve woken up from is too fresh in my mind, and my body’s still twitching expectantly. I look out the window, trying to focus on my breathing so I can get my heart to slow down, and see that the sky’s still a dark blue, the kind right before the sun starts its climb into the heavens.

I’m almost panicked as I roll over and look up towards his hammock, only to breathe a sigh a relief when I see that he’s still in it. I keep worrying that he’s not going to be there next time I look. Ever since I got him all riled up four, uh, five nights ago—and he ran off without another word—I don’t know what to expect from him. I’d raced after, but lost him before long. He didn’t come home that night, and I recall how big and empty this shitty place felt as I sat up all night waiting for him to come back. In the morning I had to leave because of work, but what I really wanted to do was go out and look for him. As I’ve said, I’m lucky that cooking simple meals is such a mundane task as it is or I would have been screwed. All day my thoughts were full of that idiot, none of them at all sensual.

When I got home that next evening, I said “I’m back” merely out of habit, but I felt like a literal weight had been lifted off my heart when I heard him mutter mutedly back. God, he was home. I was so relieved, I didn’t know what to say to him. I wanted to apologize for the way I had over reacted the night before, even apologize for suggesting bringing Windy-san over in the first place. That had been what had upset him originally, wasn’t it? Anything to fix what I’d done, but Usopp didn’t want to talk about it. He checked in with Robin-chan and the crew on the Sunny, and then crawled up into his hammock for the night, the lights still on and everything. He didn’t even give the food a second glance.

I-I didn’t know what to do. It was my fault. I’m not stupid, I know it was. I’d fucked it up. I’d been thinking to just separate us for a few hours at night to see if I could reel my crazy emotions in. I hadn’t thought that he was so worried about us getting caught. But that’s a joke right there, right? Because I know that he worries excessively about everything. I’d ruined the atmosphere between us. I’d made it to where he doesn’t even want to talk to me. I was so frustrated that I wanted to go outside and kick something until it was nothing but a shitty pile of rubble. As it is, I’ve been spending every hour of the past few days switching back and forth between beating myself up about my major fuck up and trying to figure out how I’m going to make it better.

Meanwhile Usopp’s not said more than a handful of words to me, most of which involve him somehow telling me he’s not hungry or he doesn’t want to eat. By the time I get back every night he’s either in the middle of or wrapping up his very brief exchanges on the communicator and before I can even start cooking, he’s climbed back into his hammock. He’s starving himself and I want to yell at him for it, possibly tie him up and force something down his gullet already. He’s going to get sick if he doesn’t eat, but with all this going on and the eccentric dreams and fantasies I feel all too guilty to even touch him.

Even feeling as shitty as I am, I still have the nerve to come up with something like that dream earlier. I roll over, but the cooling, moist feeling in my shorts rockets my body up right. It-it’s been ages since I’ve actually had a wet dream like this—No doubt due to all the perverse thoughts I’ve been having recently along with the fact that I haven’t jerked off properly since we got to this shitty place. It feels so fucking weird ‘cause the person I’m dreaming about is only a few feet away sleeping deeply enough that I haven’t woken him up. I get up and grab a new pair of shorts to change into before I start rinsing my dirty ones in the sink. I guess I should consider myself lucky that Usopp’s sleeping so heavily. This is the last thing I want him to wake seeing me doing.

After I’ve thoroughly washed most of my dignity out of my soiled underpants, I’m not sure what to do with myself. It’s still another good hour before I even need to be up and...

And my eyes drift back over to Usopp’s hammock. What am I going to do with _that_? I’m worried about him not eating at the very least. I could never forgive myself if Usopp started to get sick because he hasn’t gotten the proper nourishment. I look back down at the countertop behind me. I’ve got the time so I might as well make him something. Hey, if I come home and he’s left it out to waste, he’ll have no right to complain if I force him to eat it. He’ll be breaking my number one policy.

 

I can hear Sanji getting ready to leave: the sound of light metal clinking—probably his belt—the soft grunts and shuffling—putting his shoes on. I’m holding as still as I can without holding my breath. I don’t move, ‘cause I don’t want him to know I’m awake. I don’t want him to try to talk to me again. I don’t want to see him, ‘cause I’m being a coward like I always am and running away. If I see him now, it’s only going to hurt more. My chest already feels like there’s one of Zoro’s weighs tied to it, pulling it tight so it twists and hurts and breathing is painful. I’m the one getting all worked up all on my own, but I can’t face him.

Lying there, and still hearing him shuffle around, I notice the smell of cinnamon in the air. The room’s kind of hot and is smelling sweeter the longer I breathe it in. Sanji must have made something.

I hear the final noises of preparation and then his footsteps as he crosses the room towards the door. He opens it and a breeze comes in that accents the sweet scent in the air. It smells really good honestly and I pray that my stomach doesn’t growl before Sanji leaves. I don’t want him to hear that. Not when I’ve been so blatantly avoiding meals.

“Oi Usopp,” he calls back into the room. My body twitches on its own. Has he noticed I’m faking being asleep? Well he has now if he’s watching me. I hear him sigh. “Have a good day, alright?” he says and closes the door behind him.

I stay where I’m for a while longer. I’m comfortable and getting up is going to involve me actually thinking and doing. I eventually convince myself that I have to get out of this hammock and I do something between a sit-up and a roll to get out. My feet touch down on the wood floor, and shy away as an instant reaction— _the floor’s cold!_ I finally get my feet planted solidly and scratch at my face... and my stomach. I’m still really hungry, but...

My stomach growls at me so irritably, I think it’s going to start a mutiny against me.

“Shut up, stomach. I’ll feed you soon. I just gotta—”

And that’s when I catch a whiff of it again, that really sweet smell from earlier. I see it. There’s something on the counter over in the kitchenette that wasn’t there earlier. I walk over to it, running my fingers through my hair. Sanji probably made it for me. That seems like something he would do. I take off the cover and see a stack of pancakes and the steam rising from them is enough to make my dry morning mouth water. The metal cover’s kept all the heat in so the butter’s still running, but the syrup hasn’t absorbed into the bread yet. It looks like a picture and not actual food.

My stomach releases an excited growl, like it already knows that the food’s for it. There’s a note written next to the cover, Sanji’s handwriting, saying “Eat at your convenience”. I look back down at the food and I think about leaving it. I want to leave it. I’m still angry about it; I don’t want to relent just yet... but my stomach’s not as stubborn at the rest of me. It looks really good and I’m seriously hungry. I could eat a whole sea king by myself.

I eat it all quickly, only stopping long enough to get some milk, ‘cause it’s getting hard to swallow. After my stomach’s been appeased, I sit down and lean back again the wall, avoiding leaning near Sanji’s futon that’s rolled up few feet away. I look around the room, thinking about how nice this cottage looks and stroking my ego a bit at how brilliant I am that I got it to shine like this. I might even want to sell it before we leave; maybe get some kind of payment for all my hard work... But my thoughts instantly turn back to Sanji. His appreciation was the only payment that I really wanted when I started this project.

There’s no doubt now in my mind that he appreciated it. He appreciated it so much that he thought it would be nice to bring a girl over for a few hours... and kick me out for a while so they could be alone together. Yeah, I feel like he really liked what I’ve done for him. This is just like those pictures I drew all over again. A few minutes—moments of him thinking of me, just _me_ —and then it all circles back to his one biggest weakness; girls.

Ya know, I never wanted to be a girl. Never. If I was a girl, then I wouldn’t be me. Yeah there are a lot of things that I don’t like about myself—my spinelessness and my face to list off just a couple—but I’m also content with just being me. I wouldn’t be living my amazing life at sea with everyone if I was anyone else. I wouldn’t be so willing to get my hands dirty to do whatever I had to to get things done. I wouldn’t have been Sogeking nor done all of that amazing stuff. I’ve got too much pride as a man, so yeah; I’ve never wished that I was a girl. Not even once during the entire time I’ve liked Sanji. I just kind of thought that if the impossible ever could have been, Sanji might have seen that I was a really cool guy and liked me anyway. But now it seems...

The communicator goes off and I look up at it across the room from where I’m leaning on the wall. _Again?_ I stand up and sit down in front of it, messing with switches. _Who wants counseling now?_ I think. Not that I’m probably in any shape to hear about other people’s problems... Hehe, maybe I can distract myself by talking to somebody.                     

I get to the right station and there’s Nami’s face on the screen again. I moan internally. She’s going to lecture me again. I don’t need this. Not after I had to listen to Chopper cry over how he missed me last time anyone called in.

˹Usopp, that you?˼ she asks. ˹You all alone again?˼

“Yeah, it’s just me.” She smiles, but I cut her off before her mouth starts moving again. “And before you start asking or talking about Sanji, I want you to stop right there. I’m... I’m too tired of it all to listen.” She looks a little offended, but that’s one of the perks of the communicator and this distance. She can’t do much about it. 

˹But Usopp, you can’t be serious. You’ve got an opportunity to—˼

“And I said I don’t want to talk about Loving Sanji right now!!” I shout back, staring flusteredly at the screen. Didn’t she hear me the first time? Well, of course not! It’s not easy to change topics when Nami’s stuck on something. Man, our crew’s made-up of such a bunch of stubborn people. Between her, Sanji, and the Super Novas, it’s a surprise that we ever get anything done.

She pauses. ˹Usopp... D-did you just admit that you love Sanji?˼ she asks, her volume dropping all of a sudden and smile hinting at the corners of her mouth.

“Yeah, I admitted it and you know what? I want to take it back. I’m done with it, with all of it.” I’m too depressed to put a lot of force into my words, but I mean it. I want to stop loving him for real.

˹But Usopp, you just... Wait, what’s wrong? What happened? Usopp!? You okay?˼

“What?” I ask, as I feel something drip onto my arms. _Shit_ , Am I crying again? Fuck.

I scrub viciously at my face, trying to get it to go away. I’m apparently crying a lot, there’s a lot of moisture on my forearm and it doesn’t seem like it wants to stop. And I’d been doing such a good job. I hadn’t cried again since that night I ran off.

˹Usopp! Did Sanji do something to you?˼ She asks, sounding angry all of a sudden and I laugh dryly. Probably ‘cause all the water in my body is rushing to my eyeballs.

“No, no. Sanji’s just been being his normal self. It’s me that’s getting carried away,” I say, trying to smile at her. The grimace on her face tells me she’s not really buying it though. “Hey, Nami. I-I think it’s about time that I really d-do stop trying. I don’t-don’t want it anymore. Is-is that okay?” I feel like the muscles in my face are cracking from the strain. Nami’s biting her lower lip. It almost looks like she’s going to start crying herself and I don’t know what to do to stop it, ‘cause if Nami starts crying, I’m only going to feel more pathetic.

˹Y-yeah Usopp˼ and I look up at her face. ˹It’s fine if you want to stop. I-I... Consider the subject officially dropped˼ she says evenly.

I smile at her for real, even though I can still feel tears running down my face—pathetic, huh? “T-thanks, Nami.”

Nami frowns and shakes her head. ˹Thanks for what, you idiot?˼ she wipes at her eye for a second and then looks back at the camera wearing an only slightly forced smile. ˹I don’t know what you’re talking about.˼

 

I’m half convinced that the pancakes are going to be still sitting on that countertop when I get there, but when I open the door, Usopp’s sitting on the floor with something in one hand, a screwdriver in the other and looks up and me. “Welcome back,” he says wearing a smile that, yeah is a bit strained, but that’s the most he’s given me in the past few days, so I’ll take it. He looks more relaxed then he has in a while as well and that makes it easier to breathe.

“I’m back,” I say brightly. I carry the groceries in and put them on the counter. The dirty plate’s in the sink soaking. _All good signs_ , I think. I shrug off my jacket and hang it up on the hook near the kitchen. “Are you hungry tonight?” I ask, and I feel like a lot’s weighing on his answer.

Usopp looks up again from what he’s tinkering with, an anxious kind of confusion on his face, and I wonder for a second if he’s also thinking as I am about how strangely serious the meaning of his answer is going to be. But the side of his mouth twitches and then he’s smiling again. “Yeah, I’m famished,” he laughs and I’m lying to myself, ignoring the nervous hinge in it.

I smile back as I turn to face the counter. “Then I’ll make this quick.”

I’m seriously relieved that he’s simply agreed to eat—I still don’t know what I was going to do if he’d said no again—but something is still off. I glance over my shoulder as I’m rinsing off the vegetables. Usopp seems really fixated on what he’s working on. He looks normal enough, I guess. But my mind continues to ponder over it as I cook.

What made him suddenly return to normal? I don’t think it was simply me making him breakfast. If it was such an easy fix like that, this problem would have been resolved already. No, my cooking’s not amazing enough to make Usopp change like that. I-I don’t feel like he’s forgiven me. I technically haven’t given him an official apology yet. I probably should, but... If I bring it up again right after he’s started talking to me like normal, there’s a possibility that he’ll turn his back to me again and start avoiding me. Besides, we’re not quite normal yet. Usually Usopp’s talking more. Right now, he’s working on something. Right up until I asked that thing about bringing Windy-san over, he would always put everything aside to talk with me. In a way, he’s still creating distance between us. And Fuck if I know how to fix this.

I finish dinner in a timely manner and bring him over a plate of curry and rice. He looks excited as he takes the plate from me and starts shoveling the food into his mouth like a starving man. He probably is a starving man. Besides the pancakes this morning I don’t think he’s eaten properly in a while. He must have been really mad at me if he was willing to dodge feeding himself to avoid being around me. _Shit_. I reach into my pocket and pull out a cigarette. I had one on the walk back and one while I prepared the meal, but I feel like I haven’t had enough lately.

I hear the sounds of the spoon clinking against the dish slow to a stop and look down to see if he’s done. He’s still got some more on his plate, but his eyes aren’t on the food. They’re looking up at me curiously which makes something inside me stir. _What?_ I want to beg.

“Why aren’t you eating?” he asks, a half smile forming, and my heart kind of skips a beat as he adds “It’s not right if I’m eating all alone.”

I wouldn’t be this fucking happy if that wasn’t the same shitty line from my dream. I usually wait until everyone else is eating before I start enjoying the food myself, but Usopp doesn’t seem to like eating alone. I’ve noticed that for a while now. He likes the company while eating as much as the food.

I smile at him and for a second I’m controlling my bodily urges to get down at his level and kiss him breathless. That would just be like an attack out of nowhere, wouldn’t it? I hold my hand out to him and his eyebrows draw together as he glances down at it. I take the cigarette out of my mouth and blow out the smoke, ‘cause I need to start breathing again before I can talk. That look on his face is so cute. And I take note again that I’ve thoroughly lost it.

“I’ll eat. Just let me get you some more while I’m at it.”

He smiles at me and I am smiling back, but then I notice that there’s something sad about his eyes. They’re a little red. He’s been crying, that’s obvious—though I’m not going to mention it. I don’t need to—but there’s also something else. Like a painful twitch or something. It’s something I’ve somehow again, but I can’t think of anything I’ve just done as I go back to the stove to get more. I didn’t say anything hurtful, did I? What did I do?

I come back with his plate, refilled, and sit down across from him with my own. He starts digging in again, although this time slower. He’s not prattling on like usual and it feels awkward. I see the way his eye’s shift around and I can tell he’s thinking the same thing.

Well, I guess I’ve been letting him carry on the conversation for too long anyway; it’s about time I take a stab at it. I just have to be careful about what I say.

“So,” I start and he looks up at me instantly. It feels nice that he’s looking at me again. “You going to check in with everyone?” I ask.

Usopp shakes his head as he swallows the bit he’s chewing. “Nah, I already talked to everyone earlier. Everything seems to be going smoothly, you know, without a hitch.” He turns back to his plate puts another spoonful in his mouth. Visions of his mouth from my dream this morning flashes in my mind and I angrily shove them away—because this is definitely not the time for _that_!!

“Oh, that’s good.”

He nods without looking up.

“Oi, what were you working on earlier,” I ask. I’m almost desperate to get him talking to me now.

He glances over at the small metal mechanism next to him and back at me. “It’s-It’s uh, nothing really. A really old windup toy from a shop in town. It’s broken, so I was just tinkering with it, seeing if I could get it to work again.”

I smirk. He’s really amusing sometimes. I’m glancing back at those parts on the floor and wondering just how he’s got the patience for that kind of stuff. Usopp’s got the patience to sit there and work for hours or longer on the stuff he makes, the amazing stuff he comes up with. I realize that he’s also got the patience to put up with a lot of other shit. He puts up with the crew and their antics, and he puts up with the bad jokes, degrading insults. And there’s another thing I’ve not thought about. I’m always calling him out for shit, like his exaggerated lies and his cowardliness. I’m probably the one that picks on him the most. _Fuck,_ I’m such an asshole to him.

I look up again and he’s eating, eyes locked on his spoon as it moves from his plate to his mouth. He’s avoiding me. He’s trying to be normal, but he’s not acting quite right.

 _Acting_... He’s acting, that’s why. Usopp’s pretty good at putting on a performance when he wants to. Theatrics is definitely his thing. He’s been _acting_ normal on purpose, which means everything not fixed between us. I feel stupid for even assuming it was. This means I’ve got to do something about it. _I’ve got to..._

I sigh and I notice Usopp stealing a peek at me before his eyes hastily return back to his food. I’ve got an idea, but I don’t know if it will work or not. I don’t want to bring up what happened the other day, but there’s something else I’ve been meaning to tell him. I’m crossing my fingers here.

“Oi Usopp.”

He looks at me again with a flinch. That same kind of flinch like at the café and I bite the inside of my cheek, ‘cause I don’t like him being so jumpidy around me.

“I just thought I’d tell you that you’re pretty funny.”

His hand stops moving and he stares at me, a wave of confusion rolling over his face. “W-what?”

 _Like that look on his face right now. It’s so hilariously speechless. It’s adorable._ “Yeah. You can usually brighten my mood even if I’m pissed off, though I’ll usually kick your ass and call you an idiot afterwards... Uh, sorry about that, by the way.”

He still looks confused, but at least I can tell that’s what he’s really feeling and not some mask or something.

“Yeah, and I wanted to tell you I really like the stuff you make. It’s almost eerie how you’ve always got something on hand that’s just what we need. You’re a genius, you know that?” He hasn’t moved an inch, which I’m just going to take as a good sign right now, ‘cause I’m on a roll. “You’ve got more skill than anyone I’ve ever met. And you know what, you’re not as much of a coward as everyone pins you to be, because I’ve never seen you runaway when it’s really bad. You’re always there when we need you. And-and you know, I’ve wanted to tell you that I really like those stories you tell Chopper. You should write some of that shit down, because it’s good. And—”

I stop dead as I watch Usopp’s eyes start to water.

 _Shit_ , bad move I guess. Usopp’s crying and burying his face in his hands within seconds, I don’t know when he discarded his plate. His shoulders are actually shaking and I can hear him. _Is he sobbing? Shit!_

“Usopp! I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to—”

“No,” he says soggily. “No, I’m sorry,” he adds shakily. He takes a deep, ragged breath and looks up at me from his hands. His eyes look even redder now and his nose is running and he looks like a mess, but I’m not grossed out about that. I’m actually moved by it. “I never expected you to say anything like that, is all. I— _God_ , I look pathetic,” he says as he starts adjusting himself and sitting up.

“Oi weren’t you listening, you idiot?” I smirk. “I just told you, you weren’t.”

He smirks too, and tries wiping at his face with the back of his arm. I grab it and stop him. He stares up at me looking confused again, but it’s because even though I find his face endearing all tear stained, red eyed, and snotty, him wiping that all on his arm is not attractive. I grab the towel I brought over used as a hot pad and hand it to him. He takes it with a weak smile and wipes his face off before blowing his nose in it.

He looks up at me with a small smile and my heart twists. I want to hug him, to hold him tightly, but that’s probably a little much right now. I’m not sure how something like that would be received.

“Thanks, Sanji. You don’t know how much hearing you say all that means to me... Ugh,” he laughs. “That sounds so cheesy.”

I laugh too. “Just know that I meant every shitty word of it and,”—and I tack on to the end so I don’t get him possibly suspicious of the truth—“you tell anyone back on the crew I said any of it, I’ll deny it and kick your ass.”

He’s laughing harder and I’m just glad that he’s done crying— _Shit_! Spoke too soon, as he goes for the towel again and starts mopping at his face as he continues to laugh wholeheartedly. At least they’re tears of laughter.


	8. Crumbling Structure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Usopp  
> > Sanji

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m so lost right now; I don’t know which way is up. I’m being figurative here, but that doesn’t change anything. One moment I’m convinced that I’m going to somehow crush these feelings—something that’s been unsuccessful for the past two and a half years, but that’s not going to stop me from trying—and end this unrequited love thing once and for all. I don’t know how I’m gonna do it, maybe hit my head hard enough to get a concussion and forget the last few years, yeah. But that’s followed by the mindful rebuttal that I could just end up falling for the cook all over again, so that suggestion’s thrown out the window. That and I’d be forgetting all the awesome stuff that’s happened... and then there’s Chopper. He’d be mad at me...

Um, where was I..? Oh Yeah. I was gonna put my foot down this time for sure and I cut my losses.

 _But_! Then the next thing I know, Sanji’s sitting in front of me, telling me that he doesn’t think I’m pathetic or worthless. Just the opposite, he’s listing off qualities that he likes about me and trying to cheer me up in one of the weirdest ways, but I don’t give a flying leap, ‘cause it’s working and this horrible bastard is completely shattering my resolve. I’m actually fighting to keep myself together, ‘cause it like he’s found all my seams and is pulling the threads out. I’m so happy—happier than I can ever remember being—and it’s all that idiot’s fault.

I’ve got no clue what to do now. I’m sitting on the floor in this cottage watching the little windup toy I’ve got working scoot across the hardwood surface and I keep playing Sanji’s words over and over in my head. I’ve had trouble sleeping at night because every time I close my eyes, the events of the entire month replay in my head and when I wake up in the morning I’m more tired than when I went to sleep. When we first got here Sanji didn’t have anything to say to me between splitting up with Robin, this shady shack with a leaking roof, and those nasty protein bars. Things got better leading up to the surprise kitchen thing and then everything was awesome for a few days before it all crashed and burned in a spectacular explosion of my own creation; because I was getting too content and forgetting he and I are on completely different pages. Nah, forget pages, he’s in a completely different volume than I am, placed on shelves on opposite sides of the observatory. I’m thinking I’m happy that we’re alone together and we’re closer now and he’s thinking about beautiful girls and romantic evenings with them.

I’m so emotionally and physically drained that I’m having trouble doing more than playing with this..this _thing_ and thinking about anything besides Sanji. I’m not sure if I’m still as dedicated to crushing my feelings for Sanji as I was before. Because when I think about him now, that rib shattering feeling comes back in full force and I’m smiling like a madman. I think it’s worse now than it was before. Even when I think about him—think about Sanji still chasing girls and that horrible stuff—I just get weirder and start spiraling. All these ups and downs are making me dizzy, but I guess I’m lucky because this emotional rollercoaster is coming to a complete stop real fast. Tomorrow marks the end of our stay on this island and the last day that Sanji and I will be alone like this.

Yeah, tomorrow the crew should be back and Robin’s going to break the gate open and I can wave good bye to this island.

My head starts to hurt and my eyes are kind of stinging. I put a lot of work into this place and I’m going to miss it. I’m going to miss the fact that it’s not going to be just me and Sanji anymore. It was nice and I-I... What am I supposed to do now?!

The reason I was never going to tell Sanji that I loved him was because I thought he hated me. Well, not really hated, more like me didn’t care for me. He tolerated me at best. When I watched him talking with everyone else, it seemed like he had a good relationship going with them. Even with Zoro, in, like, a manly rivalry way. They act like they hate each other—and on some level they probably do—but they’re always competing and they seem like they enjoy taunting each other. That’s more than you could say for him and me. And even though Franky and Brook are a little, um, unnatural, he still talks to them all chummy. Then there’s Luffy. The guy could befriend a sea urchin and Sanji’s not immune to his charm either. Even Chopper is like everyone’s kid brother. And me? I just thought that Sanji wouldn’t seem to care. But Sanji hated things like homosexuals and everything related to it. I figured if I ever even just dropped a hint around him, he’d go from disinterested to black listing. It’d be one thing if he were to just kick me—yeah it would hurt... probably a lot, and I’d already be suffering from a broken heart—but that was the least of my worries. I’d think that he’d look down at me with contempt every time the two of us were in the same room together. I’d be living off the burnt scraps from the kitchen for the rest of my life. If that was what I had to look forward to, I was willing to live with my hidden feelings forever.

Even when things were going so well between us a few days ago, I was still nervous that he’d ignore me afterwards, want to pretend I never said anything or something like that. Still would probably kick me though, I doubt there’s any escape from that. The thing was, even when he shot me down, I still would have wanted us to be friends. I didn’t want to lose the ties I already had with him. 

And then he does something like this. He tells me that he does notice me. He makes it sound like we are friends and the ties between us aren’t something easily snapped. And now the problem is, for the first time in the history of _forever_ , I’m serious about wanting to tell Sanji. That jerk’s turned all my original intentions and resolves on their head. My goal’s gone from never gonna happen to how do I do it? And even though I want to tell him, I'm still so freakin’ scared out of my mind.

What am I supposed to do? 

 

I keep thinking to myself that it’s coming to an end... After tonight, we’ll be back on Thousand Sunny Go and Usopp and I won’t be forced to share each other’s company. I find that I’ve rather liked the fact that it’s just been Usopp and I. A darker part of my mind whispers that because of the circumstances, Usopp’s really been mine all this time—since he’s been more or less resigned to that little shack since we’ve been here, no one else there—but now that we’re going back to the Sunny, he’ll be able to come and go around the ship as he pleases. That thought partly disturbs me at my own possessiveness and at the same time depresses me because it’s true. Before this whole excursion, I would only see Usopp irregularly, breakfast, lunch, and dinner aside. Once in a while he’d pop into the kitchen looking for someone or taking a short cut to the infirmary to grab Chopper, but otherwise I didn’t see much of him... This really was the last night that I’d have Usopp all to myself.

I officially retired from my position at the Finch Café this afternoon and spent the rest of the evening and most of my left over wages on ingredients. Owner-san was very sad to hear that I was leaving—such a lovely older woman shedding tears on my account, Aww, my heart was wrenching—and the lovely Windy-san smiled at me and punched me in the shoulder saying that she was going to miss me. She certainly is a boisterous beauty, and I’m going to miss seeing her speckled face a little. But now I’m heading back to that not as shabby shack to make one last special meal for myself and that adorable idiot. I hope he appreciates all the work I put into finding all the stuff he likes. Even as I think this, I know he will. He’s very observant when it comes to shit like this.

Standing in front of this shitty door once again, I remember something that’s made me a little uneasy recently. I’ve noticed it coming home these past few days since it’s appears that Usopp’s forgiven me. I twist the knob of the door slowly, hoping that in doing so, it doesn’t make too much noise and draw his attention. I walk in, and see him slumped up against the wall, staring dazedly at the stupid little toy on the floor that looks like it stopped moving a while ago. He looks like he’s thinking. He’s so caught up in his thoughts, I think, that someone could come in here like I did and off him without him even knowing what’s happening.

I’ve been concerned. I’ve caught him like this twice now and all the other times, I feel like he’s snapped out of it just fast enough that I missed it. I wonder what he’s been thinking about that he’s letting his guard down like this.   

The door closes behind me and the noise makes him jump to attention. He stares up at me looking pleasantly startled and I’m at a loss. “Welcome back,” he says and all I can think about is that I’m fucking going to miss that; him smiling like that for me makes me smile and it’s got my heart twisting inside because my smile’s so God damn perverse. I’m not looking at him like I look at the other guys on the crew. I’m looking at him... with a shitty fantasy in mind. Even as I’m standing here, I’m thinking about wanting to touch him, hold him.

“I’m back,” I say with most of the composure I’ve got and start over to the kitchen. “I hope you’re hungry tonight, ‘cause I bought everything fresh,” I say with my back to him, for good reason too.

I hear the smile and the hesitation in his voice as he cheers “Yeah, you bet!”

I’ve got to keep myself in line, I think. But the rest of me’s got different plans. Even as I’m cutting and preparing the fish I’m going to cook, I’m thinking of other things. Looking at Usopp directly makes things go crazy in my head and I wonder if I’ve always been this love-sick before. Nah, it’s not possible.

I’ve got nothing on my mind more than wanting to see, to feel him all first hand. I wonder what Usopp’s skin feels like. Is it smooth to the touch or is it more of a callous feeling? Is his hair soft and downy like I think it is or is it coarse and firm? What would it be like to really touch him? To kiss him for real? He has those very full lips and then there’s how to kiss him around his nose. What _does it feel like_ when his nose is—!!

_Stop brain, stop! This is Usopp! I’m not allowed to be thinking about him like this when he’s in the room._

Shit, I’m already hard, damn it. I start trying to think of things that will turn my libido off. Brook’s skull-jokes... Franky flexing, _ugh_... That marimo in the bath—Okay, I didn’t need to go that far. Sex drive has been thoroughly crushed now. I probably won’t be able to get it up for a good week now with those mental images I just scarred myself with. But maybe I can try to act normally around Usopp instead of thinking about how I want to make love to him.

I suddenly realize that Usopp’s been awfully quite this whole time. I chance a brief glance over my shoulder before turning back to dinner. He looks like he’s submerged in thought again. I’m starting to humor the idea of asking him what’s on his mind. It’s odd as fuck that he’s so comatose lately, since I thought this whole awkwardness was behind us. He’s been talking to me like before and smiling like he’s never going to stop, but then he goes all quiet sometimes and I don’t know what’s got him so worked up that he’s not sleeping well at night. I’ve seen him rock around in that hammock of his, rolling this way and that and coming dangerously close to falling out of it altogether.      

The fish is almost done and I realize that I haven’t even got the rest of the meal going. _What the Hell is wrong with me?_ I take the fish off the burner and reach over to grab the vegetables to rinse them off.

...my mind goes blank all of a sudden. There’s a moment of resistance and then all I can do is wonder how the fuck he managed to sneak up on me like this. I’m looking down my nose and see something that registers in my mind as craziness, but it’s something that I’ve been fantasying about so much recently, I’m not fighting it. Just wondering how he got the angling so right; his nose’s resting against my cheek and clearly not in the way at all. It’s just lips touching lips. There’s something so chaste about it that it’s got me frozen, unable to move.

And just as I’m getting use to the sensation of his lips against mine and processing that, yes, yes Usopp is kissing me, it’s over. He’s pulling away and walking backwards, slowly at first, but I’m reading that look on his face and he looks about ready to make a break for it. I’m not letting him get away—not without an explanation first—but I don’t have to do anything it seems. In his growing haste to put distance between us, he trips over his own feet, twists around and falls flat on his face with a thud that makes me flinch.

“Ow, dammit.. My nose,” he moans as he attempts to push himself up.

It sounded like that really hurt. “Oi, you okay?” I ask, my voice sounds completely natural despite the fact I’m so confused about what’s going on. Why did Usopp kiss me?

Usopp sits up slowly, holding his nose straight and prodding it tenderly. He seems completely sidetracked by it.

“Yeah, doesn’t seem like it’s broken,” he says sounding a bit nasally. He breathes a sigh of relief as his hands move away from his nose. He looks up, smiling at me innocently and I feel the corners of my mouth twitch. _Are you serious?_ Did he forget that he just assaulted my lips a moment ago? I guess the answer would be sort of; as I watch the changes flash across his face, I can tell that he’s not only re-grasping the situation, but is still planning on running for it. But he is not going to run away—Not like the other night. He won’t come back till morning again and by then everyone else will be back and I’ll never get a real answer out of him. No, he’s not getting away this time.     

I’m down on the floor next to him faster than he can react and I get a good solid grip on his upper arm. He squeaks involuntarily, and I admit it’s been awhile since I’ve heard him make that sound, probably since we were last in the galley together at the planning meeting for this little operation. He looks down at where I’ve got a good hold on him and he face goes from nervous to panicked. What’s he got to be scared about?

“S-sanji,” he stutters. “I-I’m sorry. And you c-can go ahead a-and—”

“Was that supposed to be some kind of prank?” I can feel the muscles in my face tighten, but if he’d somehow figured out about how I feel for him and thought it would be fun to— “If you’re trying to screw with me—”

“No,” he yelps, cutting me off. “I didn’t—” the volume of his voice drops considerably “—I-I didn’t mean it l-like that.” He looks away from me and I’m pretty sure if I didn’t have such a firm grip on his arm, he’d be twiddling his thumbs. “I..I  just...” He looks like he could start crying at any second and it’s at least obvious that screwing with me wasn’t why he did it. Then why?

He looks back at me and my heart stutters for a moment at the expression on his face. He looks determined as Hell, and—making a quick mental search of everything I’ve ever seen—that face is definitely the sexiest thing I’ve ever witnessed, even though the overall effect is lacking because I can feel his bicep trembling under my hand.

“You can just kick me and get it over with. I couldn’t think of a better way to say it and if I tried to, I would have probably chickened out so I... Sorry.”

It takes me a moment to grasp everything, between that expression on his face and..and everything he’s just said. “Sorry?” I ask and the look on his face, alas, falls a little. But now’s not the time to lament over it, “Why are you sorry? Why’d you do it?”

He starts to worry his bottom lip and my brain supplies me with the information that less than a minute ago that lip was pressed strongly against mine. _Again, brain, now is not the time._

“I-I’m sorry that I k-kiss-ssed you,” he says weakly, even though it’s clear he’s trying to hold it together. “I’m s-sorry that I’m a c-coward and I thought that I c-could g-get away with it. I just thought if I missed my chance now, I’d never—and Nami keeps threating that she’s going to work me to death—and I...” he pauses and takes a breath before starting again slower. I haven’t taken my eyes off his face once and I’m surprised that he’s not backing down or trying to wheedle his way out. He’s sitting here and determined to say whatever it is. I’m just wondering what Nami-san has to do with this.

“I actually wanted to tell you. This is the first time that I’ve wanted to so badly. Even though I know you’re not going to like it, I wanted to say it. But like I said, I was too scared that I’d try to chicken out, so I-I guess I thought if I just k-kissed you, that it would be good enough...”

“Good enough for what? Seriously Usopp, what the Hell are you trying to say?” Even as I say it, my brain gives a spark of hope that maybe this is an impromptu confession or something, but that can’t be. _Stop it brain!_

“Ya-ya see,” he begins and there’s a brilliant blush burning up through that dark tan of his skin. He looks away to watch as his free hand tugs at the hem of his shirt. “I-I’ve kind of had a... well I guess that’s not the right word...or maybe...”

“Oi, get on with it, Usopp.” Because all of his muttering is giving my brain ideas and I don’t need to fuel a fire that should be put out.

He flinches and then “I’ve loved you for a really long time!!” he shouts loud enough to make my ears ring. But-but even if my ears weren’t ringing from his volume, I’m pretty sure I’d still be disoriented.

“W-what?” I ask blankly. I released him in my confusion. “What?” I say a little more clearly.

“Y-you heard me,” he says with an indignant face even though his voice is still shaky.

He’s what? I must be delusional, plugging in the words I want to hear. That doesn’t sound right at all. “I heard you, I just don’t understand...” I say numbly. He-he’s loved me? A long time? Wait! That can’t be right. I figured out that I loved him just a while ago. How can he have liked me... liked me longer?

“How long?” I ask, ‘cause this is important... It’s important to me.

“Uh,” he struggles. “Uh, I-I don’t know. Maybe since Sky Island, maybe longer.” He looks confused, like the fact that I’m bewildered is puzzling.

Since Skypiea? I race briefly over my memories of that particular adventure. The only thing that jumps out to me is when Usopp came back and rescued me from that psycho’s airship. Since then? But... And then it’s like things start falling into place; reasons why he’s been really skittish around me, or reasons about why he always seemed so happy when I looking at his art, reasons why he didn’t want me along on this trip, reasons why he was...so upset when I talked about bringing Windy-san over... _Fuck!_

“That long, huh?” I’m such an idiot. There seems like a whole lot of moments that make this look more plausible; memories where I noticed little things like small smiles he gives me when I’m not seriously looking and that brilliant scarlet that I feel is there only when _I’m_ berating him for something. And I’m such an asshole. Why would he like someone like me?

...And yet, he likes me! He really likes me!? This... This kind of result was not expected at all. What do I say? He’s not directly looking at me, but I can see him peeking up at me anyway through his long eyelashes.

He confessed to me. Yeah I had to sort of force it out of him a little, but he made the first move. He confessed to _me_. I’m not usually the one on the receiving end of such declarations. And Usopp’s the one that did it. I’ve never seen him do something like this before, well at least not without major motivation, like a life or death situation. I’m practically speechless.

Since it appears that I’m not going to open my mouth again anytime soon, Usopp speaks up.

“Uh, I understand if you’re mad at me... or disgusted or whatever, so if you just want to pretend that I didn’t do anything and act like normal I would be fine with that...”

_What? Why would I want to do something like that? Oh wait! Shit, he doesn’t—_

“...Uh and if you plan on kicking me to death, can you give me a moment to write a will or something. I want to leave Franky most of the stuff in my workshop and I want to make sure Chopper gets—”

_Fuck, what’s he talking about? Why’s he bringing up shitty stuff like this right now? Does he think that I plan on turning him—_

“—and Nami would probably want the rest of my life savings that I’ve hid away in my bunk back in the men’s quarters and then there’s—”

_Oh, Shit, he does. I’ve got to fix this..._

“—And you can have all my sketchbooks ‘cause there’s probably still some pictures of Nami and Robin in them. Just ignore all the sketches of you. I know there’s a lot of them, I’m sorry—”

_Will he ever stop Rambling!?_

I’ve lost my patience when he starts telling me that he wants to leave the rest of the meals he would’ve eaten to Luffy, and try to shut him up in the way that seems the most efficient to solving both my dilemmas. Again, I’m surprised that Usopp got the angling so right the first time. I have difficulty getting it right on my own. But the moment our lips meet, I make it work. His mouth’s still open and I can’t help myself. Not after all the dreams and visions I’ve had recently. I slide my tongue into his mouth and start mapping it, my hands are on either side if his face, holding him there so he can’t escape. I taste something strange in his mouth and it’s just as I feared. He’s still been eating those shitty protein bars. I make a mental note to find the rest of them and throw them away later without him noticing. He doesn’t need those ‘cause I’m going to make sure he never has to swallow something so revolting again.

Usopp’s resisting me at first, and I figure it’s only fair because he attacked me first, but he relaxes into it in no time. If fact, a moment after he stops struggling, I swear I can feel his tongue poke tentatively back at mine and I smile into the kiss as I pull his tongue back into my mouth and suck on it playfully. He starts pulling away again and I’m confused, because I thought he was starting to like it.

I release him and sit back. He gasps for air like he’s been drowning. His lips are swollen and his face is so red that the color’s traveling down his neck and to the lobes of his ears. His eyes are half-lidded and the image of him is breathtaking.

He looks up at me and I can’t read him well. I’ve never seen him this disoriented. I realize I’m still holding his face in my palms and let go him quickly. He sits there, still breathing unevenly and I smile despite myself. If he likes me back then there isn’t a point to holding back now, is there?

He leans back on his arms and his eyes dart around the room slowly, like he’s searching for something that isn’t there. After it seems likes he’s pulled himself together, he looks me straight in the face with an eyebrow cocked. I’m still smiling at him.

“S-so... You’re not going to kick me?” he asks.

“Seriously?” I ask back irritably.

“I’m j-just checking...” he says trying to sound annoyed, but it doesn’t. He leans his head back and I can see the still rapid pulse in his neck as he stares up at the ceiling. He tips his head forward again to look me. “If-if you’re not mad at me, then what?”

I smirk. It’s like he doesn’t want to believe what just happened. I lean forward and he cringes slightly, like he still thinks I want to hurt him. I try to ignore it. “I’m trying to tell you that I like you too,” I say as I nuzzle his neck. He shivers, but doesn’t push me away immediately. I can feel his heart pick up again, though.

“B-but,” he stutters nervously. “Y-you hate ho-homosexuals and stuff.”

I pull back enough to have our eyes meet. “You’re an exception.”

“W-why me?” he asked looking a bit panicked.

I sigh. “I told you the other night,” I say as I lean back in. “I think you’re funny. Charming. Talented. Loyal. And _cute_ ,” I punctuate each trait I list off with a kiss, trailing from the edge of his jaw, descending to his collar bone.

He’s shivering violently now, but I have a very strong feeling that it’s not because he’s still nervous. He’s become really quiet, so I look up and he’s got tears in his eyes.

“What! What’s wrong?!” I ask anxiously.

“S-so you’re telling me that you really like me back?” he asks, and while his tone is trying to be even, his eyes are begging me.

I smile as the tension leaves me. “I love you too, Usopp,” I say leaning in for another kiss.

This time he moves his head, so I don’t have to fight to align everything. He’s kissing me back and I’m now soaring above cloud nine. It’s like with every kiss, I’m becoming more and more confident that Usopp really is _the one_ like I thought in that stupid, wonderful dream. He’s kissing me back and my hands are itching to touch him. Without truly thinking about it, my hands find their way under his shirt and they start to explore every dip and hump of his abdominal muscles. He makes a peculiar noise into my mouth and before I can start into how cute it sounds, Usopp’s pulling away again.

 _He needs to come up for air again already?_ I wonder.

He’s gasping, but not like before. He looks apprehensive. “W-what are you doing?” he asks a little belatedly.

“Feeling you,” I say honestly, wearing a smirk.

“Is-isn’t that a little fast?” he asks, his face a brilliant red again.

He’s liked me for so long and all I’ve been able to think about since I realized I liked him was how much I want to love him. Why’s he being so hesitant now? I mean, I’ve been holding myself back because I thought that he would never return my affections. Now that I’ve learned that he’s loved me as much as I him, there doesn’t seem a reason to hold back. Even if he’s never done anything like this before—a shiver a pleasure runs down my spine when I think about how I might be the first person he’s ever known—I still don’t think I could wait until another opportunity arises.

With my hands still up his shirt and inching higher, I say “Look, tonight’s the last time it’s going to be just you and me in this place. Tomorrow we’ll be back on the Sunny, surrounded by everyone, and sleeping in the men’s quarters. How long will it be before I can touch you like this again?”

He blinks at me and then looks away blushing. Since I’m so close, I can hear him as he mutters, “I should have sucked it up and told you sooner.” _Mellorine! He’s so adorable._


	9. Dancing on Rubble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter contains explicit content.
> 
> POV:  
> > Usopp

I can’t believe we’re doing this. No, seriously, I can’t believe this. Yeah, there have been some pretty vivid dreams in the past of what it would feel like, but nothing ever saw the light of day... or left the toilet. I haven’t even allowed myself to think about what it would be like to be with Sanji, ‘cause I was... so.. sure. Ah! I can’t think anymore!

Sanji’s hands are crawling farther up my chest and it feels weird and, uh, kinda nice at the same time, I guess, but I don’t know what to do and I know I’m self-conscious. I’ve never done anything like this and all my knowledge comes from the outrageous ravings of drunkin’ old farts of sexual escapades back at the tavern in my hometown, and those were usually about woman. I’ve got a vague idea about how this works... maybe... Ah, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with my hands when he’s—

Sanji’s hand just feather-touched my nipple and I squeak again. Argh, why do I keep making funny noises? But Sanji’s humming and he almost sounds like he’s purring.

He leans further over me and his mouth is right next to my ear. “Did you like that?” he asks and his breath feels really hot. In fact my whole head feels hot. I might turn into a boiled octopus soon.

“Like what?” Was he talking about something specific?

His hands brush over my nipples again and I realize that was probably done deliberately. “That,” he says with a smile, ‘cause I’m pretty sure that I just made a really awkward noise again, not quite a squeak—more like a moan—which is worse.

“Uh, uh, I..I don’t know. S-sanji, what am I supposed to be doing?” I’m at a loss here.

He pulls his head up and brings it in until our noses are practically touching. He’s smiling in a way that I’ve never seen. His visible eye is half lidded and has a really soft look to it. My breaths catching in my throat just looking at him, even before he does something weird under my shirt and twists one of the nubs between his fingers. His eye’s still following my face as I hiss, ‘cause that was weird and slightly, uh, stimulating.

“S-sanji!” and that was really humiliating because his name came out sounding more like a whine or something. “Sanji, what am I supposed to do?”

He chuckles. “You just do whatever you want,” he says sounding really cool. Dammit, this isn’t fair.

“W-what’s that supposed to mean?” I ask as he rolls my shirt up. I think he’s going to take it off, but he stops right under my chin. He’s not looking at my face anymore. He’s looking down at my chest. I’m still leaning back on my arms and they’re kind of starting to hurt. I want to tell him, but he seems kind of busy at the moment. He’s leaned in again, both of his hands are holding either of my sides and his thumbs are moving in slow little circles. His hot breath is leaving a strange feeling as he trails up. It feels weird, but... It’s not like I dislike it.

“Sanji?” I say as normally as possible.

“Hmm?” he asks, not bring his head up again.

“My arms. They’re, uh, starting to fall asleep.”

“What?” He finally sits up. “Oh, shit!” he say like he’s snapping out of a daze. “’Sorry. I didn’t realize—Here,” he says as he gets up and walks over to the other side of the room.

_What’s he..._

He pulls his futon away from the wall and brings it over towards me. He starts unrolling it and I’m getting nervous all over again. _We’re going to use his bed? This is really that serious?!_ I know I agreed to this, but I’m still trying to catch on to the idea that Sanji really wants this. He really wants me. He just seems so sure.

“There we go,” he says as he flattens it out, hand patting down the soft bedding. He looks up at me and my heart’s trying to break my ribcage open again. “Come here,” he says smiling when I don’t move. I start to scoot over to him—feeling ridiculously like Scissors, the Moving Crab—and weirdly exposed with my shirt rolled up under my chin. Stupid, that’s what that is. I’ve left it like this the whole time so I just take it off. Sanji’s smiling wider when I finally plant my ass down in front of him, throwing my shirt aside.

“Now what?”

“You can lie down. Whatever makes you comfortable,” he says without batting an eye.

 _Me, lie down? What’s going to happen after that? D-do I even want to know?_ I reluctantly lie down anyway. I don’t know what I’m doing. God, I hope this is going to end okay. I’ve got this fear echoing in the back of my head that any minute now, he’s going to stop. He’s going to get angry or frustrated or realize that what’s he’s doing was a bad idea from the start.

Sanji nudges one of my legs and I move ‘em apart. I feel heat rising to my face but... it’s also heading south. I’m excited and all kinds of nervous. Sanji smiles and leans forward again over my chest, just going back to what he was doing earlier. His hands return to my sides and start moving slowing, rubbing up and down the length of my torso.

“It-it kind of tickles,” I tell him as my breath hitches, trying to not laugh. But then it all kind of changes directions, his mouth, previously spreading heat along my sternum with every hot breath he exhaled, takes a sharp right turn and his teeth just go bite down on my left nipple.

“Ahhh!” I yelp even as, it too, tries to turn into a moan. Before I can ask him what the Hell he’s doing, his teeth release it and he follows it up licking over the surface, like he’s trying to show some kind of remorse for biting. The pain is the last thing on my mind as a shiver goes up my spine.

 _Ahh, what the fuck it he doing?_ My arm covers my face and I clench my eyes shut.

He starts sucking and licking at my chest, not just the one nipple, but the other one too and everywhere in-between. It feels really good, but it’s weird and I’ve never known I was this sensitive. I’m feeling a bit betrayed by my own body right now. I keep making noises and Sanji keeps humming his approval.

He stops and I can feel him sit up. “Oi, Usopp. Stop hiding,” he says with a smile in his voice. I shake my head, and while childish, it’s still effective. Sanji sighs and for a moment I feel like I might have done something wrong, ‘cause he’s pulling away. I consider moving my arms when abruptly I feel something tug at the waistband of my pants.

“What are you doing?!” I yelp, half sitting up.

“Exactly what it looks like,” he says giving me a smile. His fingers are tucked into the waist of my pants and he’s pulling them down slowly towards my hips.

“You don’t have to do that...” I start.

Sanji smirks. “Yeah, I kinda do.”

“But...but...” I don’t know what to say for myself, ‘cause it’s not like it’s the first time we’ve seen each other naked. We live on a ship where all us guys share a room and a toilet as well as the bathhouse. Privacy doesn’t exist. But! H-he’s stripping me! And I’m going ta be lying here in my birthday suit before I know it and...

As I succumb to the fact that, yes, I’m eventually going to have to get naked—I’m not even thinking about how red my face is, my whole body feels like my blood’s going to boil right out of me—I feel Sanji release his hold on my pants. He’s leaning back and as I watch—worried yet again that he’s through—he starts to undo the buttons of his shirt. He has his eyes downcast, but has this reassuring smile on. I know the smile’s probably to make me feel better, but I’m a little sidetracked. My eyes are glued to him. I’m watching like his shirt’s some kind of curtain being pulled back to reveal the show. I’d be mortified if I wasn’t so focused. After a year or so of only stealing glances and peeking at him, he’s here, right in front of me. My tongue feels like it’s swollen to twice its size and I can’t seem to swallow properly. 

Sanji reaches the top of his slacks and pulls the tails of his shirt free to undo the last two or so buttons. He’s slipping his arms out of the sleeves and discarding the shirt on the floor like I did earlier. His skin, it’s so white, it almost glows. It’s probably because he always keeps it covered like he does. I suddenly kinda understand why he was so touchy-feely with my chest before. I want to reach out and feel his. I want to feel the difference..and see the difference, my darker hands on his white canvas.

While my eyes are locked on him, it looks like he’s taken notice. “Oi,” he says, and it sounds more tender than usual, “Feeling better about it now?”

I look up at his face and he’s got this self-assured smile there. If blushing were even still possible at this point... He’s leaning in again and his face is hovering over mine, until I change the angle slightly and our lips meet. I want to kiss that stupid look off his face. This is the fourth time we’ve kissed. I know it’s a little embarrassing to keep a count, but it makes me feel better knowing just how many times, like a security blanket.

He starts tugging at my pants again, and even though it surprises me _again_ , I don’t try to stop him, ‘cause if I do, we’re going to have to stop kissing and I really like the way Sanji kisses. His tongue feels really good against mine and then there’s the roof of my mouth. He must be so good because he’s an awesome cook, which my brain is too muffled right now to tell me how those two thoughts are related.

I like the way that he plays with my tongue too, how his mouth moves with mine. The whole experience is dizzying. I exhale through my nose, and inadvertently teach myself that I can still breathe while we’re doing this. _Yahoo!_ You learn something new every day. Though, I’d say I’ve learned a lot already...and probably more’s still to come, huh?

When Sanji finally pulls away, my groin’s starting to hurt, I’m so hard. But then there’s that unwelcomed breeze and I’m focusing on calming the rising panic in my chest, remind myself that it’s just my pants—and as the breeze tickles the bare skin down there again—...and likely my underwear too. _Relax. It’s okay. If I start panicking again I’m going to ruin it._

Then I hear the familiar sound of Sanji messing with his belt and I wince. _Ah, shit!_ T-that’s right, he-he has to take his clothes off too.

A minute late Sanji’s tossing both our pants on the other side of the room with our shirts. He’s looking down at me and it’s weird because he’s got that look in his eye like he does when he’s staring at a beautiful woman before he starts swooning. It’s embarrassing and makes me want to cover myself. It’s a little unnerving being looked at like this. I don’t let my eyes wander any lower than his chest, because I don’t think I’m ready for that. My head might just explode.

Sanji’s hands moves to rest on my stomach where he starts rubbing softly. “Are you okay?” He sounds serious and I nod.

“Are you sure? Because I want to move lower—”

“Yeah, I-I’m sure.” I want him to touch me, I just don’t know how I’m going to react. I’m not use to being touched so much and—

His hands on my stomach drifts lower until he grabs ahold of my length. I open my mouth and some weird sounding lewd noise comes out, and it’s not like I care right now because someone else is touching me. _Sanji’s touching me_.

“ _Fuck._ ”

At first I thought that was me, but then I open my eyes and Sanji’s looking breathless and slack jawed and a little unsettled. _W-what?_

He moves his hand, sliding it d-down and I lose focus again. I make another weird moan thing and then Sanji’s talking.

“God, Usopp, that’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

My eyes are back on his face, because I don’t know how one equals the other, but he brings his hand back up before I can’t think clearly anymore. He starts pumping me and nothing but incoherent sounds are leaving my mouth. I’m shaking all over and I need to do something before I really do explode. It takes all the effort I’ve got, but I manage to roll up onto my ass again. And before I start to lose my balance and fall back onto the futon, Sanji grabs one of my arms with his free hand and wraps it around his neck. I lean forward and rest my forehead against his shoulder and Sanji, bracing his empty hand against my hip, starts changing the pace he’s working my dick at to something slower. I’m relieved because I...I don’t want to lose it already.

Sanji leans his face into my hair the same time his hand slides up to the top and he rubs his thumb over the head, and I can feel him smiling as I shiver, a keening noise coming out this time. He’s nuzzling his face in my hair in rhythm with his thumb.

“ _Shit..._ ” I hiss.

“..—just like I thought...,” I barely hear him whisper.

“W-what,” I ask, my mouth feeling extremely dry at the moment.

“Nothing,” he smirks. “Don’t worry about it.”

I open my eyes, with the intent of looking at his face, ‘cause I want to see what he’s thinking, but instead the first thing I get is a very clear image of, not only what he’s doing to me, but of his length as well, standing at full erection and swaying, ‘cause, you know, all I can see is down from here, and I almost swallow my tongue.

I pull Sanji closer so I can get my chin on his shoulder and away from what I just saw, but the vision’s already burned into my mind and I can’t think of anything else. I swear my dick jumped when I saw it and I know that Sanji knows since he’s holding it. _Ahhh, it’s so fucking embarrassing_ , but at the same time it’s so hot between us that I’m having trouble thinking about why that is exactly.    

I’m at least receptive enough to notice when his hand leaves my hip.

“Oi, Usopp. You still okay?” he asks stroking my hair.

“Y-yeah,” I tremble. _I’m better than okay even though I don’t know how to tell you that..._

“Good... I’m going to change it up a bit, okay?” and I’m anxious, ‘cause even though I’ve been feigning innocent to myself for a while, I’m actually pretty sure I know what’s going to happen next.

Sanji’s hand leaves my hair and I’m not sure what he doing for a moment. His other hands stopped moving even though he still hasn’t released me. I can feel his body pull away slightly, but he’s not trying to break away. He’s moving around with something somewhere where I can’t see.

“Sanji?” I ask, trying to turn my head a bit so I can see his face.

“Just a moment,” he says with a little bit of strain in his voice, like he’s stretching. “Almost..got..it!” He sounds fruitful.

“Got what?” I ask trying to keep the nervousness out of my voice.

“I needed...” he says, sitting back comfortably and no longer straining, “..something to, uh—” he pauses, but I’m pretty sure...

“I get the picture,” I say turning my head back over his shoulder.

“Yeah,” he chuckles amusedly. I hear a click of some kind of cap and wonder intently for a moment if he seriously carries a bottle of lube around with him or something before I smell the faint scent of lavender over the other odors in the air that don’t need to be named, I assure you. It’s that stupid hand lotion that Sanji puts in his pocket so he can offer some to Nami if she ever needs any. I kind of snicker at the thought, ‘cause now it’s being used for something like this. His other hand finally lets go of me, but it gets real cold where it’s left me and I’m kind of missing the heat. I thought summer islands were supposed to be warm, dammit.

“Oi?” he asks softly, shrugging his shoulder under my chin.

“Y-yeah?” I answer.

“Is this your, uh, well, your first time?” I can tell what he wants my answer to be from the sound of his voice and I smirk despite how awkwardly I’m sitting and the situation we’re in.

“Yeah, this is. The-the Great Captain Usopp’s a virgin,” I say trying to sound light... and as a second thought, “You better not go making fun of—”

“No!” he starts, sounding a little alarmed. “No, I didn’t mean it like that. It..it just makes it whole lot more meaningful is..is all...”

I smirk again, ‘cause it’s weird hearing Sanji be all soft like this.

“Hnn, you’re not going to ask about me?” he probes.

“Heh, Nah, I.. I don’t want to know the answer.” Don’t want to hear about anything like that, especially now, when I’m so close to him... and naked.

It’s Sanji’s turn to smirk as he leans over to my ear. “You’re the third person I’ve ever been with.”

“W-wha—Auuhh!” S-stupid asshole’s just pushed a slimy cold finger up my ass. “Uahh. _Jerk!_ ” I hiss.

There’s a smile in his voice as he apologizes lamely, sounding about as sincere as Luffy when he goes and breaks something. He starts moving it in and out and it just feels really weird. Sanji’s other hand starts up on my dick again and he turns his face so his lips are right near my ear. There’re a whole lot of sensations running through my body and he adds to it by nibbling on end of my lobe.

He adds another finger which feels weirder, but it seems like he’s trying real hard to distract me. After worrying my earlobe, he starts a trail of kisses along the edge of my jaw line until I feel that he can’t stretch any further. I turn my face towards his and he’s smiling as his tongue darts out to swipe over his lips before he connects our faces again. That brings my count to a very happy five.

Sanji’s moving both his hands very methodically and I’m trying not to think about it as the fingers inside of me start scissoring. He’s doing a very good job of keeping my mind blank though. I’m too busy trying to remember how to breathe through my nose. Eventually Sanji breaks the kiss, because I guess he needs to concentrate. His head turns down towards what he’s doing and I bury my face in his shoulder. I don’t need another look, thank you. I still have the vivid images scorched into the back of my eyelids. I shiver as I think about how he’s going to be put that thing of his inside my ass and I wonder if it’s going to hurt all that much.

“Where...” I hear him mutter and I turn my head to look at him. “Where is it...?” he asks and I wonder what the Hell he’s looking for in there, my colon? Whatever it is, it’s got him fixated on finding it. He’s reaching deeper and stretching me wider even as his other hand is starting to slow down. There’s a needy feeling taking over and I want him to stop groping around inside me and get back to what he was doing before.

Practically as I finish the thought, something lights up my nervous system so intensely, that all my other senses shutdown and I see white starbursts in my vision. It’s like lightning though my system and you can believe me because I’ve been shocked by the real thing. I-I’ll never admit I screamed, even if that’s what it might have sounded like to someone with lesser trained ears. Captain Usopp never screams, especially in such an erotic way. It’s such a rush and I’m shuddering all over when it starts to fade. I’m clinging to Sanji for dear life and I can feel my fingernails biting into his shoulders. I’m gasping for air like I can’t seem to get enough and after a moment I turn my head slowly, looking for his eyes again... Uh, eye, I guess.

“W-what’d-d y-you just do?” My voice is trembling and I can’t stop it.

From the look on his face, he’s just as shocked at my reaction as I am. “I... I found it,” he gives me a dazed little half smile.

“Found wha—No, n-never mind. Can.. can y-you just do it again?” I asking, ‘cause, heheh, I’m not sure if I felt it good enough the first time.

Sanji’s smile brightens. “Anything for you,” he says sounding just a bit too eager to please. Kind of like—Nah, he couldn’t be...

True to his word, he hit it again and I have enough control this time to make the sounds that come out of my mouth deeper than the first time. It feels just as fucking amazing and I’m clinging to him for dear life all over again. He’s stroking my dick again and moving in time with his fingers that keeps poking whatever magic button there is that’s inside me. It’s impossible to think, almost impossible to breath. I’m not sure when, but he gets two more fingers inside me and I only know this because I hear him say, rather smugly, that he’s got all four in.

_What? When?_

He pulls them out and there’s an empty feeling all of a sudden. I can’t stop myself when something that sounds like a beaten dog comes out of my mouth. “S-sanji?”

“Just a moment, Usopp. I’m right here,” he says and nuzzles the side of his head against mine. I admit the whine was pathetic, but him cuddling me actually does make it seem better. I hear the click of the bottle again and then he hisses, his mouth already close to my ear, “Shit, that stuff’s cold.”

“Heh,” I laugh dryly and not just because that’s an expression. My throat feels a little hoarse.

“Okay,” he says. He reaches out his hands and scoops up my legs from under my thighs. The moment I’m off the floor, I grab onto him tighter. He chuckles. “S’okay. I gotcha,” he says sounding cocky. I would have felt better if he’d just told me what he was planning in the first place.

Now that he’s got my ass in the air he brings me that much closer to him so that our chests seemingly meet. I look down at the brilliant contrast; it’s just as awesome as I thought it’d be. He starts to let me down and I can feel something prodding my backside. My grip on him tightens instinctively.

“It’s okay. I’m going to go nice and slow,” he tells me. He does. He’s going so slow, I’m amazed at his endurance. I can feel it gradually breeching me and it’s a whole lot more filling then just those fingers. He stops after I’m pretty sure he’s got the head in and then he exhales like he’s been holding his breath. He’s red in the face and there’s a clear sheen of sweat over his skin. And I belatedly realize I’m mirroring him. He looks down, I assume, at where our bodies are connected and I’m kind of taken for a loop there too, because, _Shit_ , we _are_ connected aren’t we. I-I never dreamt that this could happen. And even though it aches a little, I...I look ta Sanji’s face again.

“Hey, if you w-want to speed it up a little, I don’t mind,” I say, watching his expressions closely.

He shakes his head and gasps for air. “Heh, no. This is okay. I got this.”

“Sanji, you’re turning purple. Y-you can—”

“No,” he says with the harshest tone he’s used all evening. I don’t know how to convince him otherwise. He seems steadfast on doing this at his slow, grueling pace.

When he starts moving again, thankfully it’s at least a little faster. It’s another minute or two before I can feel his legs under mine and a faint tickle under my balls which I’m pretty sure is pubic hair— _Ahh_ , weird sensations—but not nearly as strange as the feeling of having something so big inside me. I feel that I’ll have the need to defend Sanji’s honor next time I hear Zoro makes some snide comment about any lack of manhood in the future.

Sanji seems to sigh with relief and he looks up at me wearing that cocky smile of his, his visible eye hooded. “See,” he says rather breathlessly. “I... told you... I got this.”

“Yeah, but you don’t have to torture yourself.”

He shakes his head again. “It doesn’t hurt, right?”

“Yeah, I-I’m fine.” He shifts underneath me and I can feel every little jostle. I’m pressing my lips together tightly so more of those weird noises don’t slip out.

“If you need more time to get—”

“Just start moving. At this point I-..I don’t know how much l-longer I’m going to be...”

Sanji’s face gets a little redder and I smile, ‘cause after him saying all the cool lines all night, I finally got him to blush. Point one for Captain Usopp!

“Okay,” he says as he’s moving under me again, and eventually I’m lying flat on my back once again with the futon beneath me, my rear end still in the air and connected securely to Sanji, which the thought of makes more heat dance through my lower half. He moves his hands around and places them firmly on my hips. “You holding on to me?”

“Haven’t let go yet,” I smile timidly as I flex my arms that are still wrapped around his shoulders and he smiles too, right before he starts pulling out. He keeps going until all that’s still inside me’s the tip. Then, almost as slowly he pushes back in—not nearly as slow as the last time, but I can tell he’s watching my face for any sign of distress. It feels hot and strange, but as he moves, his face is gradually changing and watching the expressions of growing pleasure that are washing over him is truly amazing. I might not be so sure about the rest of this, but I can see that at the very least, I’m making him feel good. He pulls out of me again and then pushes back in, faster this time. Eventually he starts to build up a steady rhythm and I can feel him twitching and moving inside me.

Just as I’m starting to wonder if this is it—this is that great and awesome thing called sex that I used to think sounded sooo cool and grownup when I was an adolescent hanging around that tavern—Sanji moves, changing the angle just slightly and those white starbursts from before start exploding again, making me forget where I was going with this as I cry out.

“Did I find it again?” he asks, trying to sound smooth, but is too busy to put much effort into it.

After he finds it, he keeps angling it so he hits that place inside me almost every time he thrusts in and my hips eventually start to move on their own, trying to meet him half way. I’m feeling like I’m really close to some proverbial edge.

I hardly notice as Sanji reaches in-between us and suddenly grabs my length, attempting to stroke me at the same time. The sudden attention to my otherwise neglected dick makes it even harder t-to control myself. I throw my head back and I moan with abandonment, ‘cause I just can’t seem to control _any_ part of me right now. Every part of me is twitching and then, over everything, I hear Sanji’s voice—loud, practically a moan itself, and he’s cursing— _but not in a good way._

 _W-what?_ I think groggily. _Is something wrong?_

A-and then I feel it... whatever _it_ is: hot and wet swirling around, all of which is unquestionably inside me.

_Did-did he just...?_

“Fuck,” I hear him mutter, his forehead against my shoulder. I’m holding perfectly still. I don’t know what to do in this situation, you see... or what’s the right thing to say at the moment. Sanji’s breathing hard like he’s trying to catch his breath. We’re slowly starting to cool down and the sweat on my body is starting to give me the chills. By the time he finally lifts his head, both of us are breathing normally again.

“Fuck,” he says through his teeth. I wince because it’s sounds a little harsher than I expected. When I open my eyes again, Sanji’s staring down at me with a pitiful look in his visible eye.

I smile, trying to seem comforting. “Y-you oka—”

“Fuck,” he grimaces, clenching his eye shut, turning his head away.

“I-I guess not,” I try, attempting to keep my voice easy.

“I can’t—Oh God,” he gasps. “That’s pathetic! I-I can’t believe I seriously just did that.”

I want to do something, but uh... I haven’t moved my arms yet. They’re kind of stuck like they are, like they’ve been around his neck so long I don’t know how to let go. They’re too stiff and my shoulders feel locked in place. _Shit_...

“If it’s any consolation,” I smile. “I was just about to—”

“Shit, Usopp,” he moans.

 _Ahh!_ Did I do bad?

“I fucked up,” he says. “It’s probably because I haven’t had a chance to relieve myself since we got here and because I’m been fantasizing about you for most of this shitty trip.”

I inhale sharply. “Y-you’ve been what-ing about me?” I’m confused and..and my head’s swimming and there’s a nasty feeling around my ass that’s getting kinda hard to ignore and it’s getting cold in here—Sanji’s body heat’s the only reason I’m not shivering yet—and I’m pretty sure that I’m still achingly hard. I’m so close right now it’s not even something to laugh about. And then I hear him say something like that and it’s like the world’s been turned on its head for the second time tonight.

Sanji’s face is already red and he seems to have thrown his reservations out the window. “Ever since I realized I liked you, I’ve had a hard time controlling my shitty libido,” he admits. “I could be doing anything, anywhere and I’d suddenly be thinking of nothing, but you and how it would be to be with you. I’ve been driving myself half-crazy trying to control this shit around you and other people.”

I gulp nervously around the large lump forming in my throat. It’s hard to lie here and listen to him talk about romanticizing with me. He couldn’t have really been thinking about me like that, could he? I mean, it’s one thing to hear that he returns my feelings, a fact that I’ve still not thought through thoroughly yet, because it still seems so impossible. Which is funny considering where we are right now; lying here with him still inside me in this shack on an island in the Grand Line, the New World, where we see new impossibles being done every day.

Sanji’s moving over me again, moving his hands to rest on the futon on either side of my head so he can hold himself up. I still can’t move and I feel trapped. _Stupid arms, let go already!!_ But Sanji isn’t trying to pull free yet and seems fine with me remaining to hang from his neck like a baby monkey. With his hands supporting him, I feel it as he pulls out and then some of that _slimy stuff_ comes out with him. _Eww! ...Okay, Usopp stop sounding like a girl. It’s just cum. You’ve—but Eww!_ My eyes are clenched shut and I feel it oozing out and I just want to take a bath already.

“I’m sorry Usopp.”

I open my eyes again and look up at his face. His one eye is turned back on me and he looks frustrated.

“I’m sorry,” he says again.

“You don’t have to keeps saying that,” I say, ‘cause it’s embarrassing enough without him continually apologizing. “I’m not really disappointed anyway. It felt good and I—Ahhh-...!”

“But you’re...,” he says gesturing to my still hard erection that he’s now got in his hand again. I’m a little startled that he just grabbed me again like that, but it’s still really sensitive and it feels so good.

“Y-yeah, I am,” I breathe through my teeth. I want to ask him if he can just let me go and give me a moment alone to myself or something so I can just finish it off, but he really seems to have other ideas. He starts moving his hand again and I gasp.

“Ahh, if you keep doing that, I’m going to come,” I warn him and he gives me a torn looking smile.

“I believe that’s the point, you idiot.”

“But—”

It takes him only a few more strokes before I’m shuddering all over. Everything he’s done feels way better than just masturbating alone in the toilet and I shout his name as I have so many times before when I release. The whole thing’s like a mighty tsunami crashing down on me and submerging my head in a thick white froth; everything else feels raw and exposed. I’m lightheaded and don’t want to move, not yet. I’m quite content to just stay right here and wait for everything to come back into focus. But then the pounding of my heart starts to slow down and the fresh layer of sweat on me starts to cool and when I shiver, I’m reminded again that I’ve got nasty cum inside my ass and mines probably all over me too. Now that it’s over I feel kinda weak... and still a bit lightheaded.

It isn’t until I try to move that I realize my arms are still stuck clinging around Sanji’s neck. He’s looking at me, a soft smile on his face, and I feel a fresh blush warm my cheeks. I tug at one of my arms, trying to get them to budge, but they won’t listen to me. _Traitors! Mutineers!_ I tug again and in my moment of weakness I feel my throat constrict and I whine.

Sanji looks alarmed. “What’s wrong?!”

The warmth in my face turns into a burning sensation and I turn my face away. “My-my arms are st-stuck,” I admit lamely. “I-I can’t unhook them.”

Sanji seems instantly relieved. “Is that all?” he sighs. He reaches over us and grabs something, or at least I thought he was—something like a crowbar would be handy—but he comes back empty handed. Instead, he switches arms so that he’s supporting himself on the hand that he’d been using earlier and uses the other one to grab my arm and uncurl it from around his neck.

“There, that better?” he asks as he uncurls the other. My arms fall back on the floor and they feel like dead weight, but I can also feel the blood rushing back into them, so they’re tingly as Hell.

“Yeah, better,” I say without letting the wariness show in my voice. I want to move, to go take a shower or something. But all we really got is that barrel tub I made outside and that takes a bit to set up. I don’t feel like waiting, let alone getting up to do manual labor even if the reward of soaking in hot water sounds tempting. I roll over and release a long string of curses.

“You okay?” Sanji asks as he climbs off of me.

I thought I was—okay, that is—but my backside feels heavy and-and... “I can’t get up,” I say with a note of shock in my voice. _Why? It didn’t feel like this earlier when we were doing it._ I try to move and the pain zaps me again and I gasp this time. _Shit!_

“Th-then don’t try moving,” Sanji warns. “I’ll be right back.” He gets up, forsaking modesty as he streaks over to the kitchen. He grabs one of the larger pots off the hooks and fills it with water before putting it on the stove.

I don’t know what he’s doing, but I can’t just lay here all night. I’ve got to get cleaned up. It felt really good while he was doing it, but now everything feels gross. I have to wash off his spend and mine and then there’s sweat and the smell of lavender. It hurts and just pushing myself up into a sitting position makes my breathing sound labored, but after a minute or so, I’m up on my ass and popping the kinks in my shoulders and arms.

“I thought I told you not to try moving.” Sanji’s coming over with a large bowl and some kitchen towels draped over his arm.

I’m blushing again. “I didn’t want to stay on my back any longer,” I tell him.

He sighs as he gets down on the floor next to me and dips a towel into the water before coming at me with it.

“What are you doing?!” I ask startled.

“Washing you off,” he says with a straight face. “Why is it that you keep freaking out every time I do anything?” He doesn’t sound angry, but there’s a hurt tone in his voice and I feel bad for causing it even if I feel my freak-outs are totally justified.

“I’m just not used to any of it,” I admit.

Sanji looks a little more hurt by that, but he has a smile on his face as he touches the cloth to my shoulder and—it does feel really good—says “Then we’ll just have to fix that, won’t we?”

He wipes the towel down my arm, cleaning it off and dipping it back in the bowl before I find my voice again. “W-what about you?” Even as I ask, I notice that he’s already cleaned off somewhat.

“I took care of me while the shitty water was warming,” he says reaching back up and washing off my collar bone.

“Ah, I can do that!” I say obstinately, grabbing one of the other towels and putting it in the water. “Y-you don’t have to do my front!... You-you can j-just do my back for me,” I say hoping my voice doesn’t sound as pathetic as I think it does.

Sanji looks at me a little startled, before he’s laughing into his other hand. “W-what’s so funny!?” I snap.

“Nothing. I-I’m just happy that you’re acting like yourself again...”

“What? When was I not acting like me?” _What’s he talking about?_

“No, that’s why I said it was nothing...” He says, soaking the towel in the water and moves around me until he’s kneeling behind me. The moment the warmth touches me, I start relaxing. I mean you can try and convince me that after what we just did there’s no reason to still be self-conscious, but that’s not going to change anything. I’m still nervous about everything, but it feels damn good as he rubs between my shoulder blades. _Why am I so sensitive all of a sudden?_

I feel him washing away most of the sweat and I feel like melting into it... But! I-I’ve got to stay focused. I start scrubbing at my front and lower body with revived zest. I need to get this stuff off of me. “You’re not making any sense,” I mutter as I work the towel in my hands and start washing the me off of me. _Oh God..._

He chuckles again, but after that it’s like we slip into an agreeable silence. I usually don’t like sponge baths, which when you’re covered with bandages—like I often find myself after some of our bigger adventures—it’s really all you can do to fight the smell, stay clean, and prevent infections. I’m kinda amused that I’m enjoying this. It’s nice. Hey, hey! Maybe, if Sanji’s not opposed to the idea, we can do this in the bathhouse on the ship and I could even rub his back too. I mean, Sanji likes me back!!? Don’t-don’t you do stuff like that when you’re in a relationship, take baths together and stuff? I’m in a Relationship with Sanji, right? That’s what confessing and sex means, right? I mean confessing and kicks means the opposite anyway. Maybe I should ask—

“Usopp?”

“Hmn? Yeah?” I say trying to look over my shoulder.

He looks up at me wearing a serious look and I freeze. Is this the part where the dream turns into a nightmare as punishment for me getting too carried away with happiness? Sanji rolls his shoulders and his attention shifts back to my back. “You do realize that I like you right?”

I gulp as a nervous instinct. “Yeah, I thought that anyway.”

“Good. Knowing you, you would start doubting me right about now.”

“What!?” I’m half offended and... half embarrassed, ‘cause he’s right, but still...

“Oi, if you’re done over there, lean over so I can clean up my shitty mess back here.”

Before I can even start sputtering about, no I can do that myself, or even that he could have found a better way to put that, he gives me a hard shove and I fall forward, catching myself on my hands before my nose crashes into the floor. “Oww-ow-ow-ow! My backside’s still tender, ya jerk!”

I expect a quick and snappy retort, but Sanji doesn’t say anything and I look over my shoulder. He grabs a new towel and soaks it before I feel him start cleaning me off. This is so embarrassing; I bury my face in my arms. Here I am with my ass in the air and Sanji’s cleaning it. Oh the humiliation!!

“I didn’t mean to do it like this,” I hear Sanji say in a hushed tone. “I meant to have you come first. I...I was going to pull out before this happened, but you...”

“I don’t mind,” I say and I think for a second that he didn’t hear me because I am talking into my arm, but I guess he did.

“You’re supposed to mind about something like this,” he almost growls and I feel him prod at me to emphasize, but all I can do is snicker.

“Why are you so upset about it—?”

“Because I wanted to make your first time faultless,” he barks, as he scrubs a little too hard in just the wrong spot.

“Ahhh!”

“Ah, shit! You okay?”

“Y-yeah... Can you stop asking me if I’m okay, already? You’ve been asking that all night.” I’m looking over my shoulder at him. “I’m not a china doll or something.” He looks away and back at what he’s doing, which doesn’t relieve any of my embarrassment at all.

“Besides,” I say and he glances up again. “I l-liked it... a lot. So you don’t need to keep making that remorseful face anymore... Got it?”

He smirks and I hope for Pete’s sake that he’s almost done. “Yeah, I got it.”

After another minute of this, Sanji starts gathering the towels up and walks back over to the sink with the water that’s probably cold by now. I crawl over to my bag to get my pajama bottoms out at the very least. I don’t think I can stand anymore of this being naked shit. In fact, I don’t think I can stand at all. I wrestle into the suckers, rolling around on the floor for a bit. When I look up, Sanji’s standing there laughing.

“W-what’s so funny,” I demand. Sanji takes his new cigarette out of his mouth and covers it with his other hand, shaking his head. I narrow my eyes at him because I’m pretty sure he’s laughing at me. He’s already wearing his sweats, low around his hips and I look away as I’m blushing. It’s because I’ve got bigger issues to deal with. Like how I’m going to get into—

“Oi.”

“Hmn?” I look back over at him as he’s flipping the futon over to the clean side.

“You want to sleep over here with me?” he says with a smug look on his face. I stare at him incredulously. “You can’t climb into that thing anyway. It’s easier this way.”

He’s right, but this kind of feels a little too perfect. First the loving confessions, then hot sex, and then falling asleep together. I’m worried that I’m using up all my life’s luck and that I’m going to wake up to the world ending tomorrow... speaking of Nami—She said they’d be back tomorrow around afternoonish so we should all be ready to go by then. I’ve still got to tear down the communication system and pack everything.

Argh, I’m too worn out to think about that right now though. I look back at Sanji who looks pleased with himself. Without committing to anything, I crawl back over to the futon. Sanji smiles as he grabs the comforter and pillows. He looks so excited and I’ve got this weird feeling about all this. Sanji’s kind of acting like he does around...

When we’re both lying on the futon, rather close to each other ‘cause it was originally a one person bedding, he pulls me closer and despite the fact that it feels like the time when we all climbed on Chopper that night in Alabasta for warmth, I’m really pretty happy with this. Thinking back to even just this morning, I’m five hundred million light-years away. Lying there in the dark, ‘cause Sanji turned off the light before he laid down with me, I’m thinking about what the two of us just did. I’m glad that I confessed to him. Really glad that I tripped when I did—even if that did smart something awful—‘cause I’m not sure what would have happened if he hadn’t caught me. Thinking about the actual sex right now it a little too much for me to handle, but something from it catches my thoughts.

“Hey, Sanji?” I whisper half hoping that he’s fallen asleep already.

“Hmm?” he mutters, sounding tired, but not groggy like I just woke him.

“Uh, earlier you-you said that I was the third person that you’d been with....”

“Yeah... Third time’s the charm,” he says moving around next to me so he can see my face better.

I blush at his joke, but keep going with my question. “W-what was the gender of those first two, uh, partners?”

Sanji looks confused; I can see that even in the dark now that my eyes have had awhile to adjust. It goes from confused to almost affronted. “They were girls, of course. What’d you think they were?” he says like I’ve insulted his manly pride.

“I-I just wanted to know how you knew what you were doing earlier. How you knew about that one spot and stuff,” I say quickly.

He sighs, sounding aggravated and I can feel the noise as it travels from his chest to his throat and out his nose. “That’s kind of a shitty story,” he finally says. He keeps his lips sealed so long, I’m wondering if he’s fallen asleep on me.

“It was during those two years we spent training.” Sanji hardly ever mentions his two years, only describing it as being nothing but Hell and torture and I’ve always wondered about it. “I was surrounded by a bunch of these sick, twisted, shitty bastards that were into that shit and I heard a lot about their sexual fantasies even as I was trying to block them out,” his voice sounded casual, but I can see from the look on his face that he’s reliving tortured memories and I hear him mutter something about “..shitty okama..” under his breath.

“It-it’s okay, you don’t have to say anymore,” I say quickly.

He nuzzles his head against mine. “Just know that you’re the only guy that I could ever be with, let alone get it up for,” he says soft and there’s this warm feeling in my chest, ‘cause beside the part about “getting it up”, that’s one thing I really wanted to hear.


	10. A World With fewer Walls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Usopp  
> > Sanji  
> > Usopp

I’m awake before I fully know it. Everything close to me feels warm and cozy and I’m all nestled in so I don’t want to move at first. Then I shift one of my legs. The other one feels like it’s quite possibly in an octopus’s vice grip—a hairy octopus at that—and I realize there is a hard stable floor under me rather than my free swinging hammock. When I shift, trying to roll over just a bit, there’s _two_ problems that arise rather quickly. There’s another limb of some kind stretched over my torso and that octopus theory is starting to have a lot more potential—which is an awesome new story idea for Chopper so I make a metal note of it—but then there’s also my lower body as I try to escape. I feel an awkward soreness that I’ve never known there and warning signals start blaring in my head. My arms feel trapped in front of me so I can’t reach out to find out what’s wrong with everything, so as a last resort, ‘cause I didn’t actually want to get up yet, I open my eyes.

The first thing I see is Sanji’s face, his stubbled chin’s almost within touching distance from my nose. I start to panic for a moment— _Wha-WHAT HAPPENED!_ I try hard to get away from the limb’s—HIS LIMBS!—until my pelvis moves again and— _Yikes, that Hurts!_ —everything from yesterday comes rushing back to me like a tidal wave.

My eyes go back up to his face, studying it in a way that I’ve never been able to before. I’ve never been this close to him—well not before last night... _Oh God, last night..._

I’m at least now positive that that wasn’t just an amazing dream that I conjured up while in my delusional state yesterday, toiling over confessing. Sanji really _did_ say he liked me back and then... He and I did- _did_ _all that_... and afterwards—I blush as I consider our current positions—we fell asleep in each other’s arms.

I hear Sanji mumble something in his sleep and moves slightly next to me before I realize rather startledly that his other arm, the one not wrapped around the space between my shoulder and my waist, is under my head. I fight a yelp from escaping my mouth, because that’s the cheesiest thing ever. I lie here wondering just how he got it under there when I thought he fell asleep before me. I look at him again and even though this is surreal—I’m not sure I want to trust what I know or not—and I would really like to stay right here and be like this until Davy Jones himself comes in here and rips me away, we have to get moving or Nami will come storming in here and do it herself.

I reach over and unhook Sanji’s arm from around me. He mumbles some more, but stays asleep. I sigh and then focus on the next trial I’ve got to face. I brace myself for hurt. You’d think with Sanji handling me with kid’s gloves yesterday, that I wouldn’t be so sore— _Is sex always going to hurt like this?_ I struggle until I’m sitting up finally and decide to take a break here. I’m not looking forward to the adventure of trying to actually stand up. I look around the room. This is the last time I’m going to see it.

I’m still going to miss this place, but the funny thing is that now I’m not so upset about saying goodbye anymore. Hey, maybe it’s because I don’t need what it stood for any longer. You know, ‘cause now Sanji’s not going to push me away the moment we leave? That’s right, what’s it going to be like after we’ve left this place behind? I comb all my fingers through my hair roughly and yawn as I roll that idea around in my head. That probably is something I’m going to want to talk to Sanji about while we’re packing up.

Eventually, I figure it’s about time that I start making the attempt to get up. As I rock forwards— _Eas—OW! Easy!—_ my stomach growls. I throw a glance over at Sanji, worried that I’d woken him again, but he’s sleeping soundly. With another soft rumble from my tummy, I remember that we never ate dinner last night and chuckle to myself.

The unexpected sound of an incoming call coming from the communicator makes me flinch, caught halfway between sitting up and rolling forward—my lower back twinges in response. The communicator goes off again, sounding just like a regular den den mushi— _beru-beru beru-beru_ —and it’s an uncoordinated struggle-crawl-walking-on-my-knees-thing speckled with a lot of whispered cursing to get to the other side of the room and I’m lucky, I guess, that I didn’t pack up the communicator yesterday like I’d planned to. I wonder what anyone on the Sunny would want to tell us this early in the morning—and for a horrifying moment I wonder if Nami knows about what happened through some mysterious means—but when I finally pull my ass up into the chair, slowly lower into the seat, I notice the transmission’s actually from Robin.

I quickly work the dials on the side of the screen. This is _Robin_. She hasn’t called in at all besides our prearranged check-ins. When her face appears on the screen she looks as calm as ever, if not a bit more serious. ˹Usopp-kun? Good morning.˼

I scratch the side of my head. “Uh, good morning, I guess. Robin? Is-is everything okay there?”

She’s wearing her usual disconnected smile now, but she shakes her head. ˹It appears the professor has managed to return a day earlier than scheduled. She’s alerted the Captain and the base is looking for me quite furiously˼ she says making it sound like she’s talking about the weather.

“They’re-they’re what!?” I sputter.

She smiles at the camera on her wrist. ˹I’m sorry if I Ruined your and Sanji-san’s morning.˼

“N-no, we’ve got to...” _I’ve got to get Sanji up and we have to pack everything up now. Then we have ta_ — “Wait! W-what do you m-mean ‘ruined our morning’?!” I stare into the camera incredulously with my jaw agape.

˹I’m apologizing if I unintentionally interrupted anything˼ she says with a sweet tone that would normally have Sanji gushing if he was awake to hear it. Me? I’m screaming in my head.

_How does she always know about this stuff!!_

˹That aside, if you and Sanji-san could come at your earliest convenience I would appreciate it. I’m kind of in an awkward situation it seems.˼

I pause nervously. “This is-isn’t ‘cause of that weapon they were designing, is it?” I ask, thinking I already know the answer.

˹That would appear to be the case Usopp-kun.˼

 _Ahhh!_ Leave it to Robin to be so calm about something like this. “I’ll be—I mean we’ll be there as soon as I manage to dismantle the communicator.”

˹Thank you for being so Efficient, Usopp-kun˼ she smiles again. ˹Oh, and Usopp?˼

“Yeah,” I say as I fumble to turn the mic back on. I’d already started moving to start tearing it down.

˹Congratulations.˼

My face feels like it’s on fire. “Aah! C-can’t you just focus on your own situation?”

She simply giggles in response.

 

Ah, that was the best I think I’ve slept since we arrived here. Yeah, my arm’s a bit stiff, but I cannot imagine a more wonderful feeling than waking up next to...—I open my eyes and see the empty bedding next to me. I cock an eyebrow. _What is this?_

I hear more of the sounds that I assumed roused me and look up to see the very object of my affection already at work on taking apart that communication system.

 _It seems rather early to be so hard at work_ , I muse to myself. I wonder what’s gotten into him.

“Good morning,” I say and he glances up at me with a red flush on his face, but he doesn’t flinch like I expected him to.

“Oh, uh, ‘morning,” he says turning back to what he’s doing, screwdriver in hand and all and I’ll openly admit I am more than a little let down by the offhanded greeting. But at the same time, I’m amused by the view before me. The idiot is leaning over one particular section of the setup with his hair pulled back and his goggles on, but otherwise he looks like he just crawled out of bed himself. He’s still wearing his pajama bottoms and his chest is bare. His bare feet are dangling from the chair and it all paints a rather impressive picture.

I get up and make my way over to him, leaning over his shoulder and watching for a while before speaking, although this time he does lurch in his chair, and from the unpleasant look that arises on his face, I assume he’s inadvertently bumped what’s most likely a still tender part of his back.

“What are you—Oh, shit! Sorry!”

“Ahh, ow! Uh, no, it’s fine...” he says sitting up a little straighter. “Robin called in a few minutes ago,” he concludes as he immediately returns to what he was doing.

 _The Lovely Robin-chan?_ “What did she have to say?” I ask curiously. It’s been awhile since I last saw her beautiful face.

“That Bacari-woman’s back. I got to hurry and tear this stuff down before we can go help her.” _What?!_ “I guess you were right about Robin needing back-up,” he says throwing me a quick smile as he works.

I’m torn between being angry that he seems so nonchalant about Robin-chan’s circumstances and being giddy over the smile he’s just shown me. I decide to let the two cancel each other out and focus on what’s important at the moment. “Is Robin-chan alright?” I ask seriously.

“Yeah, she told me we don’t have to hurry, but I’m not going to take any chances. I’ll just pack everything up as soon as possible so we can get over there.” I watch and he really seems to be working rather hastily. But as I stand here, I hear what is unmistakably the sound of Usopp’s stomach and I watch as he cringes at the sound of it. “Sorry,” he says with that same innocent snicker and expression he flashed me the first morning after we arrived here. I assume it’s only natural given that neither of us ate last night. Not that I’m fully unsatisfied with how last night turned out, my thoughts dance over the wonderful mental snapshots I collected of our crew’s sniper.

“I’ll make us breakfast while you’re work on this,” I say patting his shoulder and I notice the red tinge of color reappear on his face and rather pleased with the fact that it’s presence there is entirely of my doing.

I walk over to the kitchen and take out the fish that I’d put away last night in my haste to get water to clean us up with. I figure if I warm it up and serve it with miso and rice it should make a decent enough breakfast. I start the rice cooker and unhook another pot from the wall above the stove.

As I stand here, chopping the green onions for the soup, I’m musing over how this is probably the last time that I get to cook using my small petite kitchen. Since it was a gift from Usopp..—which now that I think about it, oh, and the stuff we did last night, can’t forget about that, it was probably an original labor of love—and I’m really sad I can’t just take it with us.

It’s a surprise to me that I’m so calm when my beloved Robin-chwan is in trouble, even as the voice in the back of my head’s telling me that she’s probably not in any real danger. I glance over at Usopp and smile to myself. No words can really depict how over joyed I still am with the fact that the budding love that I had for him not just yesterday was not only reciprocated, but met with the ripened reception of his own feelings. While I’m fighting the guilt that feels like bile in my empty stomach for what shitty asshole I’ve been to him in the past, I’m set on a future ahead of us where I spend my days showing him that it is more than just a whim that brought me to this revelation of my affection. I’m going to see to it that there’s not a moment when he doesn’t know that he is loved.

 _Oh ,yeah._ I look down at what I’m doing again. I don’t want to take too long. While we’re on a time crunch, Usopp’s probably really hungry.

~~.~~

Sneaking into the marine base was actually surprisingly easy. With most of the soldiers searching the compound for Robin-chan, the security at the entrances were severely lacking. There were two or three shitty guards there when we arrived and with Usopp’s _Bakusui Boshi_ , they were dwn for the count. Once in the halls, Usopp took lead pausing only long enough to motion me to follow. I didn’t give him the chance to get out of my sights, staying close behind him. I wasn’t sure how he knew where he was going; he must have discussed the lay out of the base before with Robin-chan at some point if not earlier this morning.

On the other hand, while I never let my guard down, I silently berate myself. From the looks of it he was normal, and even though he looked alright physically, I know he’s still sore. It’s not something you can see from his stride, because he was walking fine. It’s every time we have to stop, either to avoid some solider or to check around a corner. There’s a brief moment where pain flashes across his face. If I could, I’d tell him to wait his lovely, shitty ass outside and just let me handles this. If he hurts, it’s because I did a shitty job last night— _Or maybe there’s just no avoiding that the first time_ , I muse. Because of the plan we established, he has to be here, but I’m worried about him—which isn’t that weird of a feeling since I feel like I’ve always been a little worried about him specifically when we go into battle. It’s just another moment where I’ve felt something for him and dismissed it.

As far as strategies go, this one’s simple. The two of us are going to split up— _just hearing the term when Usopp first used it made my heart twist_. Usopp’s going to use his carnivorous plants to cause a distraction while I take care of Robin-chan’s security. It’s fine, we’ve used this trick before, but I can’t get that look on his face when he winces out of my head. I mean if anyone, I’m aware of his strengths, but he wasn’t at—  

Before clearing the next corner, I sense it and yank Usopp back by the strap of his goggles. A bullet grazes the wall inches from his face.

“W-wha—!?” he sputters, staring at the dent in the wall where his head had been only moments earlier. I can see a shiver run through him at the thought of what could have happened.

“Oi, you alright?” I ask. I know he told me to stop fussing over him so much last night, but—

“Uh, yeah,” Usopp says, sounding less like he even remembers what he said and more like he’s still a little rattled. He glances up at me, wearing a weak smile. “Th-thanks Sanji.”

I want to shower him with affection and tell him that he doesn’t need to thank me—that I would have gladly taken that bullet for him, _taken thousands_ —but I remind myself that now is not the time. “Don’t mention it,” I tell him as a partial alternative. Fewer words, my true message lacking explanation, but I hope to express everything to him later when there’s time. More so, I feel like there’s a lot that hasn’t been talked about between us yet. We’re missing a lot of important details, well, because we were too— _Ahem_ —distracted last night and this morning turned into a rush to get here. I feel like I want to save Robin-chan quickly, but not just because she’s in danger. The longer I wait to talk to Usopp, the more I feel that that my window of opportunity to do it is slipping.

Using observation haki, “There’s a large cluster of shitty marines waiting down that hall for us.”

“Then this is where we go our separate ways,” Usopp says unwaveringly and I clasp my hands over my heart. The way he can say that so easily without batting an eye is so cruel after we just started our relationship. “Sanji?” he asks giving me a curious look.

Oh, that’s right. I need to stay focused. “Yes,” I say quickly. “I’ll go find Robin-chan and we’ll meet you back here.”

He nods. “Good luck,” as he reaches into his bag and pulls out that fancy modified slingshot of his, firing one of those Green pop-shots down the hall towards the marines as I sprint off in the opposite direction. I can hear the yells of surprise from the confused marines over my shoulder and smile to myself. Usopp’s ingenuity is so breathtaking.

Guideless, I reach out with haki again looking for Robin-chan’s ever composed nature. She has such a way of remaining calm in such circumstances. When I’m not far from her location, it looked like I don’t have to keep it up as lovely, delicate hands spring from the walls and point me in the appropriate direction. Robin-chwan’s so thoughtful!

Still, even though Robin-chan’s my first concern in this situation, my thoughts keep slipping back to that shitty long-nose. As I said earlier, I’m aware that he is a very competent fighter; I know this, but still he’s not at his best when in close range combat and especially now when he can’t really run and move at full capacity. I’m responsible. Robin-chan needs to be saved first, but it needs to be done as quickly and efficiently as possible so I can get back there to help him.

The trail of helpful limbs stops in front of large overly done set of doors that look too fancy after all the iron and rusted ones I’ve run passed. This has to be the Captain’s office or something I assume. Only marine seniority would flash their grandeur around like this. But why would Robin-chan be held up in here of all places? I was under the impression that the marines were still looking for her.

All cunning strategies and thoughtful approaches aside, I kick the doors open ready to demand where the gorgeous Robin-chan is. I don’t have time for bullshit.

What I find leaves me more than a little confused. I expected to find Robin-chan is some kind of trouble, leaning more so on the deadlier side of things since the lovely Robin-chan’s likely to be able to handle herself in most situations—and yes, I was thinking that I could just burst in here and be her prince on a white horse—but what I see looks like a shitty tea party. Robin-chan, still looking lovely with her short blonde hair tucked behind her cute little ears, sits on one side of a coffee table on a sofa—a lovely spread and quaint tea set covering the surface of the table—and across from her sits another beautiful woman with hair wrapped up into a bun and a superior’s marine jacket resting on her shoulders.

 _The Captain is a woman?!_ She’s very pretty. Older, but pretty and something about her is very familiar, though I can’t put my finger on it.

She smiles at me and a powerful _click_ sound brings my attention to the gun in her hands that she has trained on Robin-chan across from her. She pulls the hammer back as she sits there. Both of them look very relaxed and comfortable despite the fact that even a child could tell this is a hostage situation. The other woman—the Captain—there’s something in her smile, I realize, that reminds me of someone, though I don’t know who nor do I have the patience to give the thought another second. Robin-chan’s in danger and needs me to do my part to save her.

“So you’re one of the men that Professor Bacari mentioned to me,” the Captain speaks. “She was very adamant about one of them being a playboy with a pretty face. Should I assume—Uh?” she loses her composure as she speaks, but she is very sweet indeed.

“Bacari-sensei said something like that about me. I’m honored!” I say feeling flattered that even though we were so cruel to the professor, that she would still remember my face so kindly. Oh, what a lovely woman.

“Uh,” the Captain says as she looks at me suspiciously. She turns to Robin-chan who is smirking into a lovely hand placed over her mouth. “Is your associate always like this?” she asks cocking a thin brow. I’m not sure entirely what she means by that. Is there something strange about me?

Robin-chan meets the woman’s eyes wearing her casual poker face smile. “Sometimes, Captain Wilhelmina.”

“From the way that the boy moves, he seems to have less of a spine then I would expect from you rebels.” Her head turns back to me, her eyes narrowed now and her smile’s gone. “You two are the ones that abducted professor Bacari. In her report she was very adamant that one of you two possessed an Akuma no Mi, though she wasn’t sure which of you or about your other friend all together.” I’m distracted for a moment by the thought of Usopp who’s still in the hall fighting off marines. _Shit, I have to make this quick_.

“As you can see here,” she says gesturing to the gun in her hands, which is still pointed at Robin-chan. “I possess a gun that’s been designed to hold and fire bullets made of Sea Prism Stone. If either of you make a move that I don’t like...” she says sounding far more confident in her weapon and against us then I’ve heard an enemy in her position in a long time. My eyes look to Robin-chan and she seems to understand my confusion. The Captain is confident, but she’s not a match for either of us—I mean, granted I would never strike a woman, I could disarm her and restrain her easily. I know Robin-chan’s probably in a bind because of the Sea Prism or she would have already handled this herself. This woman wouldn’t even be a match for Usopp. So why’s she seem like she’s looking down on us.

“Captain Wilhelmina?” Robin-chan asks looking lovely and innocent. The Captain throws Robin-chan a look that threatens her to keep her mouth shut. “I would like to introduce you to the young chef from the Finch Café that you praised so much.”

I’m confused how even the lovely Robin-chan knows of my job at the café, but whatever she’s said has greatly upset the Captain. The woman turns in her seat, the barrel of her weapon moving with her, till the gun is pointed at me.

“Impossible! You can’t be the Jin that my daughter told me about!” she says, her face aghast and I wonder what she— _Wait! That’s it!_ —“ _You’re_ the flamboyant cook that’s been making the meals my Windy delivers every day? I thought she said that you were gay.”

And I feel my ego as a man’s been thoroughly shattered, falling to the floor like so many pieces of broken glass. Robin-chan smiles at me from where she sits wearing a sympathetic smile and I try to regain my composure before it gets us in trouble. _But-but gay!? Windy-san you even told your mother about that?_ I suppose now that I am in love with a man, that statement has justification, but that’s not reason enough to go telling the world such-such a thing...

I breathe through my nose, trying to recover my frazzled nerves and shattered pride. It’s at least obvious now why this woman can sit back in her chair and think she has control of the situation. She doesn’t know who any of us are, Robin or myself, or that we are pirates. She said rebels earlier, at least I’m pretty sure. Most marines spit at the word pirates—not that I could ever see a woman quite like the Captain spitting—and they loathe them enough to address them by nothing else. If she’s still unaware of who she’s really up against, the better. We don’t need marines knowing that the Strawhat pirates have made it this far. Robin-chan’s smile glows as she watches me and I believe she knows that I understand now. This is all about getting that gun. Robin-chan wants to get rid of the bullets in the gun, but can’t. That’s why she’s putting up this charade. Well, I would do anything for the lovely Robin-chan. I charge at the Captain. Again, I’d never lay a finger on such a lovely being, but—

I aim a sharp kick at the gun in her hand, the Captain’s is either too dazed or too slow to respond, and the gun flies through the air. It hits the wall on the other side of the room leaving an impression, but falls from its hole with a clatter to the floor.

“How did you—?” the woman’s voice is cut out as Robin-chan cups one of her limbs over the Captains mouth.

“Thank you Mr. Cook. That’s all I needed.”

I walk over and retrieve the gun. “Are you sure, my lovely—” but the lovely Robin-chan raises a finger to her lips and I stop before I say too much. “Are you sure mademoiselle?”

“Yes. I think I’ll be quite fine here.” I can see the panic coming over the Captain. Besides her gun, she seems unarmed. Moreover Robin-chan’s sprouting limbs seem to be confining the woman’s movement completely. “You can go and help Mr. Long-nose now, if you’d like,” she says sweetly. I pause for a moment, wondering why Robin-chan would suggest that even though it is very much what I would like to be doing right now. “I’ll meet up with the rest of you later at our prearranged meeting location,” she assures me. I nod, taking this opportunity to turn the safety on and tuck the gun into my belt.

“I’ll see you then,” I say as I run out of the room, wondering vaguely what Robin-chan plans to do to that woman and trying not to imagine it. Robin-chan’s even stunning when she’s terrifying unsuspecting marines.

 

They’ve been keeping their distance this whole time. I don’t know if they’re too intimidated by Midori Boshi: Devil or what, but from here, I can pick them off easier so I’m not complaining, except for the fact that every time I’m forced to shift my weight from one leg to the other, there’s that exasperating pang of pain that shoots up my spine. “Just how long am I going to be like this?” I mutter under my breath as I fire off another simple Kayaku Boshi. Anything bigger would seem like a waste at this point. I glance over my shoulder, back at the way that Sanji went, wondering how they’re doing.

Just as I turn back towards the chaos in front of me, I hear the echo of Sanji’s voice. I can’t make out what he’s saying, but I’d know it anywhere. I feel a tightness in my chest release when I hear it. I place a hand over my heart. I didn’t realize that I was so nervous about all this.

I look over my shoulder again and smile when I see him racing back here, half curious where Robin is. “Hey San—!”

“Look out, Uso-swaan!” _All of my what?! He-he did not just call me that, did he?_

Sanji wizzes past me and I watch as he kicks a marine who is standing a little too close to me for comfort in the jaw, followed by a quick turn and kick to the solar plexus. _Shit_ , I’d taken my eyes off them for a few seconds and they’d already moved in on me. But I’m looking at Sanji right now, and I admit my expression is rather funny looking.

“W-what did you call me?” I stutter, only to have to reload Kuro Kabuto and fire another hoshi before a second marine can get closer to us.

“What, did I call you something?” he asks, looking confused.

“Y-you just called me Uso-swan, like you do Nami,” I stare at him for a moment before turning back to the marines that keep thinking that they can attack when I stop staring down the hall. I’m not that pathetic that I can’t hold my ground. I’m a sniper. I can pick off enemies easy.

“I did?” Sanji says look a bit amused about something and he scratches his chin.

“Yes, you did.” I don’t know what he’s playing at. Did he not hear what he obliviously said?

“Well, I kind of like the sound of it...” he says all too confidently. Before I can tell him off or at least tell him no, he starts talking again. “Anyway, Robin-chan told me that we can meet her back on the ship.”

“What?” I gasp and Sanji turns around, kicking another marine whose snuck close enough in the ribs. “B-but what about the gun—”

Sanji smiles at me as he pat the pistol tucked securely into his belt. “Got it,” he says coolly.

“And Robin—”

“She said that she had everything covered, so I came back for you.”

I stare at him blankly. Does he not realize that what he’s saying goes against everything I know about him? After he was so adamant that someone stay behind to help Robin, he suddenly understands that Robin is more than capable of handling herself? And he came back. _For me_? The pathetic scaredy-cat sniper. I-I know what happened last night is real and all—the pain in my keister won’t let me forget—but I-I just never thought that he’d do something like this. I feel kind of numb—except for the pain in my backside, that’s still there...—but I know for a fact that I know I’m smiling. There’s even a wet trickling feeling on my face.

“Shit, Usopp. Why?!” Sanji, sidetracked for a moment with kicking another marine grunt sideways into the wall, gets all frustrated and I can’t help but laugh. I-I’m not sure why I’m crying. It probably seems really weak and shit, but I can’t help it. I never imagined, even in my wildest fantasies _ever_ , that Sanji would come to help me when he could be helping a girl. I know that sounds really shallow, but that’s the way he is and I’m just a member of the crew, a friend...—well was, but I still—I never thought that he’d come to help me.

“It’s okay,” I sniffle and push my goggles aside to wipe my face with the back of my hand before I fire another shot at a marine. I can’t hit anything if my eyes feel like they’re swimming. “I’m just really happy,” I smirk at him.

Sanji sighs, pausing long enough to crush his cigarette under his shoe and I’m happy to see that he’s smiling. “Is that it? Well, that’s better than the alternative. We should get out of here and get your stuff,” he smirks and glares over his shoulder at the remaining marines. When he looks back at me, he’s still smiling. “Nami-san will be upset if we’re late.”

“Uh, yeah,” I say, shoving Kuro Kabuto back into my shoulder bag. I do one more quick swipe at my face. “Let’s go.”

I can remember a few other drawn out escapes from marine bases in the past. None of them were this easy. Most of these marines seem busy or distracted and there wasn’t much butt kicking involved. I’d almost be nervous that this was a trap or something, if it weren’t for the fact that I know these marines were weaker than the caliber we’re used to fighting. It’s like they’re completely unprepared for an attack. This makes me wonder, not for the first time, how this check point is still here. If you can’t get through without passing inspection, and they’re this weak, why hasn’t another group of pirates destroyed the base yet? There are plenty of other pirates in the New World that could take this place out easy.

Walking back to the brush and shrubs where Sanji and I stashed our bags, including the return on my huge backpack—stretched even tighter because of the increased load that’s inside since we were last here—I look back over my shoulder at where we’ve come from. “Are you sure that Robin’s going to be okay?”

Sanji looks over his shoulder with a thoughtful look on his face and nods. “Yeah, she looked like she had things under control when I left.” Looking back at me for a moment, he looks away as he says, “It was strange how she knew I wanted to come back for you,” he muses out loud.

My face goes hot and for a second I’m mulling over how I’m going to say this. “Sanji?”

“Yeah,” he says smiling at me and my heart suddenly feels too large for my chest.

“Robin, this morning, she-she kind of,” I pause, watching his face, “already figured out... about, uh...” I point at him with hands that I’m fighting to hold steady and then at myself. “...she already knows about us.”

At first glance, Sanji didn’t react, but his face gets all pale the next second. He leans into me with our eyes locked; he’s upset, I know he is. I mean, just because he told me he likes me back there doesn’t mean he wants the rest of the crew to know, the rest of the world. Back on the ship, it’s one thing for Luffy and Zoro to be all open about it, they’ve been that way since before Sanji and I even joined. They’re so natural together, it’s hard to notice anything unless they’re making out in some not so secluded hiding place or you literally walk in on them. But Sanji would probably—

“You told her?!” he asks earnestly, his one visible eye doesn’t look quiet angry, but...

“No, I-I didn’t,” I say quickly, the rest just kind of tumbles out in one breath. “She just figured it out all on her own. I swear!” After a moment, I tack on for good measure, “You know how she is.” And, still thinking about it, “Actually, she kinda knew about my feelings for you before even that.”

Sanji’s eyes look away before his head does and he pulls away from me in favor of standing there with his head bent forward and his shoulders hunched and I don’t know what to do. Is he going to be mad at me? Is he worried about Robin’s figuring it out? What?

“Usopp?” he finally says and I stumble over a “y-yeee-s..?”

“Robin-chan aside, do you mind if we keep “us” between just us for now.” I nod. I’m really fine with that. I’m more than happy. If he doesn’t want to tell anyone then it’s fine with me. I personally think I could never be as bold as, say, some other members of our crew. And Sanji might even be asha—

“Usopp.”

“Yeah,” I say feeling better about this now.

He reaches over and grabs my shoulders quickly and panic flashes through my system, because I’m still nervous about everything and I don’t know when this dreams going to turn into the nightmare it’s ultimately going to end up no matter how many times I tell myself I’m not asleep. But Sanji looks past my wince and that stupid little squeak that I make when he grabs me and after a short pause, he moves his head to the side and kisses me. Ha! Number six—and my body adjusts faster this time and I kiss him back, kind of proud of myself ‘cause I think I’m doing it right.

He pulls away after a handful of heartbeats and looks me dead in the eyes. “Don’t go thinking that I’m backing out of this or I’m ashamed about it, you got that?” and I’m not sure if my head’s still spinning from the kiss. It’s feels like he’s reading my mind. “It’s just I’ll never hear the end of it from that shitty marimo after all those faggot jokes I’ve been feeding him about him and the captain!”


	11. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> POV:  
> > Nami

“I can’t fucking believe this!” After all that work to come up with that stupid plan and then I have to set sail with the rest of these idiots for a month—to which was the worst decision I have ever made and I’m going to write that down in my log book and underline it three fucking times so I can make sure I never try something like this again, like getting stuck being the only one left standing between that moron of a captain and the fridge—to go on a treasure hunt—the treasure being the only redeeming light of this whole trip—while those two other idiots get to vacation on a summer island, it turns out that Robin didn’t actually need to break into the base and sabotage the system. There’s apparently another way to get around the check point that other pirates have been using for years. “This was such a waste of time and resources!”

Robin, sitting at her normal seat across the table on the lawn deck, looks up from her book chuckling and I sincerely hope that it’s the book that she finds so amusing. “At least it wasn’t a total waste,” she says leaning her chin on the back of her hand propped up on the table’s surface. Looking at her, I’m glad to have her back here with me, because I’ve missed her company the most. I’m also glad that she finally ditched that stupid wig she’s been wearing. The look on Sanji’s face when she tore it off was priceless.

I sigh, because even though life here was Hell, I guess she’s right. “Yeah, you guys did manage to steal those horrible Sea Prism bullets from the marines, so I should be happy with that.”

Robin smiles at me as she turns back to her book, “Yes, it seems that our trip might have been successful in more ways than one.”

I cock my head to the side. What does she mean by more ways than one? I feel like there’s been something she knows, something she been keeping to herself, and I want in on it, because from the sound of things, it seems like pretty juicy gossip.

“Sorry to keep you lovely ladies waiting, my mademoiselles,” says the ever eager voice off our lovesick cook. God, it’s nice to have him back too. I almost forgot how easy he makes it around here for me. Not that I’m going to stop indulging myself, but I guess I could throw him a bone every now and again.

“Thanks, Sanji-kun,” I say taking the fruity cocktail he’s offering me and he smiles at me with that stupid dreamy look in his eyes again, freaking hearts for eyes and that stuff.

“Don’t mention it, Nami-swan!” he says as he moves over to Robin who closes her book and pushes it aside to take her drink.

“Thank you, Sanji-san,” she says meeting his eyes as she takes it and if I hadn’t been watching, I’d have missed it. For a moment, Sanji’s lips twitched and his normal flirty nature drops. It’s only for a mere heartbeat and then he’s noodling again.

“You ladies are far too generous,” he says hugging the serving tray he has close to his chest and smiling much too wide for his face. It’s such a familiar sight that I try to tell myself that I shouldn’t think too much on what I just saw. Sanji’s seemed to really have a spring in his step since we got the three of them back on the ship and Usopp—

“Sanji?” Speak of the devil. Usopp comes over, hands still covered in grease that he’s smearing on his thighs as he approaches and I shake my head at him. “Oh, Nami, uh, Robin, heheh... Do you know where Luffy is? I need his help with—”

I feel like groaning. “Don’t bother. He and Zoro disappeared a half hour ago or so, so I’d just wait for them to reappear later if I were you.” Why Zoro couldn’t have been distracting Luffy earlier when I was at the point of ripping my hair out, is beyond me. Just my luck they were probably in the middle of a lover’s quarrel or something... Which actually might explain that fight that broke out on deck....

“Oh,” Usopp says, a light blush coloring his cheeks. “Really? Um, I guess I could wait until...”

“Why not ask Franky if you need assistance?” Robin offers stirring her drink idly with her straw and Usopp shakes his head, his ridiculous hair bouncing around animatedly.

“Nah, he’s busy right now and it can, uh, wait,” he says glancing from Robin to Sanji and then to me. _What the Hell?_

“Then if you’re not doing anything at the moment, could you help me with something,” Sanji says, smiling at Usopp and again Usopp glances awkwardly around.

“Sure, uh, what do you need?” he asks nervously.

“Dishes,” Sanji says with a smile as he starts back for the kitchen. Usopp looks after him confused for a second and then jumps like somebody just slapped him.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Uh, bye guys!” he says jogging after him.

I take a sip of my drink thinking about the last time Usopp and I talked over the communicator and wonder how he’s been holding up. It must be hard harboring feelings for someone for so long before hopelessly giving up like he did. And he’s been keeping it together so well around Sanji. I just wish there was something I could do for him, you know, that doesn’t involve me spending money or just flashing him, though I’m not so sure that would really cheer him up anymore...

“Usopp-kun seems to be in higher spirits since we got back, wouldn’t you agree Nami-san?” Robin says as she turns back to her book.

“What?” I ask curiously.

“Oh, nothing. Just speculating out loud...” Robin says wearing a highly amused smile. 


End file.
